Cal Evans

I am one damn lucky man. ❤️ ❤️ ❤️

@allgarbled Mine keeps a running tally of the token refund I am due because of its stupidity

I made a /seppuku skill for my Claudes for when they make an unforgivable mistake, and now they use it spontaneously without me asking.

@SandyS1 @SMB_Attorney Ocala doesn’t suck, there is a cool little speakeasy down town. But we are looking a little west of there in Beverly Hills, FL

@CalEvans @SMB_Attorney Also, Ocala is central Florida and…it’s boring.

Central Florida gets a bad rap, but the data and reality says otherwise. You could make a serious argument that Orlando is one of the best places in America to live right now. The Orlando metro was the fastest-growing large metro in the country last year, adding roughly 76,000 new residents in a single year with 2.7% population growth. And people aren’t moving to “Orlando.” They’re moving to incredible places like Horizon West, Winter Park, and Lake Nona. Horizon West exploded from ~14,000 residents in 2010 to nearly 75,000 in 2025 and has become one of the fastest-growing master planned communities in the country. Lake Nona has transformed into a legitimate innovation and health-tech hub with Medical City, UCF’s medical campus, biotech investment, autonomous transit programs, and one of the most ambitious mixed-use developments in the country. Winter Park gives you a completely different vibe, walkable streets, lakes, great restaurants, Rollins College, old Florida charm, and household incomes north of $130k for families. People talk about the heat, but the reality is Orlando has 8-9 months a year with incredible weather while much of the country is dealing with snow, gray skies, or brutal winters. And then there’s lifestyle. You get lake living almost year round. World-class golf. Boating. Restaurants. Professional sports. And the #1 tourist corridor on earth sitting 20 minutes away whenever you actually want it. Disney, Universal, concerts, conventions, Michelin-level dining, events, all accessible without needing to live in the middle of it. The business ecosystem is also way more developed than outsiders realize. Deloitte, Lockheed Martin, EA Sports, Siemens, KPMG, Disney, and a growing tech + healthcare ecosystem all have major operations here. Orlando’s GDP is approaching $200B. And MCO has quietly become one of the best airports in the country. When I lived in Dallas and Denver, out-of-town visitors came every few months. In Orlando, it’s basically every week. People underestimate Central Florida because they associate it with tourism. Meanwhile, a lot of us are over here wondering why more people haven’t figured it out yet. Cc: @kenpozek

@jamesawhiite Bite me. in FL we wat Daylight Savings Time.

It’s imperative that we revert to STANDARD, not Daylight time, for two reasons, one of which you may have never considered. You know the first: solar noon is closest to 12 o’clock all year. That means an equal number of hours before and after noon each day. This also means earlier sunrises which are significantly better for establishing a healthy circadian rhythm. The second reason is that nearly ONE THIRD of US counties are in the wrong timezone. A significant swath of the country isn’t only an artificial hour ahead because of daylight time… but TWO HOURS ahead of true solar time. Year-round daylight time, especially without recalibrating time zones, would establish this error permanently, affecting millions of Americans. We should be letting the Sun dictate the day the way God made it. Arbitrary, artificial tampering would be worse for us all. Fix the time zones and affix standard time.

This is day 145 of asking @LeaderJohnThune to pass the SAVE America Act. Can you believe I’ve had to petition Leader Thune for 145 consecutive days to do his job?

Doug McCormack’s fight for fair laws changed his business and helped other craft distillers — hear the hard-earned lessons he shares. #FoodEntrepreneur heartsntales.com/podcast/002-ya…

Raw workshop footage: Colby Theisen and Chris Schmitt walk through marrying engineering precision with hands-on craft. Watch here: youtu.be/7kr2-C8jqSE?si… #MadeByHand

Two simple Truths: Jesus Christ died for our sins. America’s fallen died for our freedom. May we live worthy.

@r0berto_mid_5 You’ve obviously never been to Ohio

I think this area might be the most racist place in the world

Proud to be in DC tonight. Honored to be the Grand Marshall for the Memorial Day Parade tomorrow. Here to give Respect and Gratitude to our Fallen. Remember them on #MemorialDay.

@ScottPresler Tell them nobody cares. Tell them to get their butts off their shoulders and do the damn job they are paid to do. The will of the people. Same goes for you Sir, we don’t pay you to podcast. We pay you to get things done. Of late all I’ve seen you do is podcast and vacation.

BREAKING Senator Ted Cruz revealed on his podcast that 4 Senators are P*SSED: ▪️Bill Cassidy ▪️Thom Tillis ▪️John Cornyn ▪️Rand Paul From President Trump’s endorsements to losing elections, each of these Senators — according to Cruz — is angry. With a 53-47 majority, we can’t afford to lose 4 votes & this will complicate how we move forward. Source: Verdict with Ted Cruz

@TeamCornyn @newtgingrich It is really rare to see Speaker Gingrich wrong, but its happened before.

Former Speaker @newtgingrich knows effective conservative leadership matters. Texas needs a Senator who will continue delivering for Texans, protect our conservative majority, and fight for the values that make our state strong. I’ve done that throughout my career, and I will keep getting results for Texas families in the Senate.

Memorial Day isn’t about barbecues or beach days—it’s about those American heroes who gave everything for our freedom. THIS 70-SECOND VIDEO CAPTURES WHAT THE DAY IS TRULY ABOUT. 🇺🇸

Those were good times. :)

This is day 144 of asking @LeaderJohnThune to pass the SAVE America Act.

@JohnCornyn @statesman This is day 144 of asking @LeaderJohnThune to pass the SAVE America Act.

@RobertMSterling No. Not once in his career did he do brilliant comedy. Jerry Seinfeld did, Rodney Dangerfield did, but Colbert never did. At best we was C-Level.

The tragedy of Stephen Colbert is that he really is a brilliant comedic talent and—according to those who know him in real life—a kind and thoroughly decent man. He could have maintained his liberal political beliefs while ring-fencing them from the Late Show and no one would have cared. Instead, though, he sold out, electing to become little more than a regime-media court jester, a funny man’s Rachel Maddow. He chose pandering to an actuarially decaying audience of geriatric shitlibs over remaining funny to a broad and politically inclusive audience, and he ultimately paid the price through declining relevance, reduced ratings. and decimated advertising revenue. It would be tragic, if it weren’t so completely well deserved.

Stephen King has never proved that he’s not a pedophile

@ThePrimeagen When the dust finally settles, and we all realize the discipline required to properly use agents, I think we will be looking at a productivity increase on the order of a factor of 2 to 5.

Hello Senator Thune, I'm replying to your post from yesterday: "Despite Democrats' partisan games, we're still going to get the entire federal government funded." Today, you sent the Senate home... not because of Democrats. Because of you. Here's what actually happened. On May 18, the DOJ announced an Anti-Weaponization Fund: $1.776 billion to compensate Americans harmed by Biden-era DOJ abuse. Your own caucus revolted. After a two-hour closed-door meeting, you departed for Memorial Day recess without a vote. ICE and CBP funding, punted to June 1. The "partisan games," it turns out, were yours. Your stated objections: no congressional authorization, no eligibility standards, no legal precedent, executive overreach. Fine. But let's talk about November 2025, when you tucked a provision into the government funding bill. The FBI had quietly seized phone records from eight Republican senators without notice, under an investigation codenamed "Arctic Frost." Your provision gave those senators, and only those senators, $500,000 per violation, retroactive to 2022. The House voted 426-0 to repeal it. The critics weren't opposed to compensating victims of DOJ abuse. They were opposed to senators compensating themselves while doing no other structural reforms. Lindsey Graham held the Senate hostage to preserve it. He delayed a spending deal in January 2026 to secure a floor vote on his revised version. Let's put the two columns next to each other: ➤ DOJ abused senators: $500K/violation payout, senators only, no hearings, no process, no eligibility debate, no floor vote on substance. ➤ DOJ abused Americans: "very legitimate questions," two-hour meeting, Senate goes home, reconciliation punted, June 1 deadline in jeopardy. You told Punchbowl News you "did not personally see a need for this fund." You personally saw a need for the fund when the targets were you. Go cry harder to your Punchbowl friends @JakeSherman and @AndrewDesiderio, because at this rate, they'll soon become the only people who are buying what you're selling.