Christy

If you are going to tell lies about me, at least make it interesting. Tell people I hexxed you with an ancient Wiccan curse and now every time you go to flip your middle finger you can't.

You never forget how it all began.

Don’t waste time chasing anyone, unless it’s yourself.

Know my every waking thought and love me anyway.

Creating something out of nothing is one of the internet's best kept secrets

Watched Independence Day the other day and one of the few realistic things about it is that two people actually said goodbye to each other on the phone.

If you look closely, you can tell a person's damage by their tweets. But nobody's got time for that, so whatever.

My love comes unconditionally. My devotion does not.

Held hostage by hesitation.

I wanted to remember him so I wrote down every lie. First I ran out of fingers. Then I ran out of toes I'll always remember you, baby, just not for any of the reasons you might be hoping for.

It is quite timely, that someone could give away their twitter account and then Twitter immediately gives that person back their first account, which they were previously locked out of for years. Like a little Christmas miracle for everyone, and not at all shady.

There's a woman on Twitter who tells people I doxxed her for writing a tweet about a raccoon. Please don't get any of your facts from Twitter.

Every time I read an inspirational tweet I think about that one friend who liked to tell my then boyfriend when she was masturbating, and not gonna lie, the tweets feel a lot less warm and fuzzy.

Girl, I am just relieved that you survived your eleven failed engagements and multiple Mexican kidnappings so that you could be here on Twitter, and celebrating your birthday month with us.

If she talks a lot about light and love, oh boy are you gonna get a lot of angry drunk text messages in the middle of the night. Good luck.

Romantic: moving to someone's town to be with them Slightly less romantic: moving to someone's town after they've broken up with you and asked you not to. Multiple times.

If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong

@deepeemaurer 🤣🤣🤣 I mean, she isn't shy, and they are nice boobs. Everyone knows that.

@CheeseDaydreams tell her it's because she has spectacular boobs and watch the fun.

Her: -stalks every tweet for a year & a half -tells people I doxxed her for writing a tweet ABOUT A RACCOON -watches every interaction & DMs people to tell them they shouldn't talk interact with me Also her: OMG why is this bitch obsessed with me?