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Count Mackula
65.9K posts
Count Mackula
@CountMackula
6’3, slappin babies for thee. Celebrity consultant. Dolphin whisperer. Musician. Wildcat Linguist
Same Galaxy as You Katılım Eylül 2010
2.2K Takip Edilen7.7K Takipçiler
If you ever feel behind in life remember Sauron was 50,000 years old when he forged the one ring. It’s never too late to follow your dreams.
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@CountMackula This still has me laughing… years later and not at Christmas 🤣😭
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Fit check, kidding I am already work it is too late
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Not Red or Blue
Red White AND Blue
United We Stand
America Strong
July 4th
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I wanna see the CEO of Pfizer taking benzos
Trung Phan@TrungTPhan
Costco CEO Ron Vachris did the “CEO eats his own product” challenge by destroying a hot dog (and confirms the Costco hot dog combo is staying at $1.50 forever). Legend.
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@fayesxh Not sure
Approaching women is one of the most fun things to do
Just be ready for her girlfriends to trash talk a little too haha
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@Okay_Bye___ I wept because I had no shoes,
Until I saw the person that had no feet.
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When I finally open up about my pain and they say 'others have it worse'
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I was cool
a decade or so ago
(mean mouths: still am bitch)
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Sipping your own blood heals you,
so just prick your finger and get a few drops any time you need to
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The Straight of Vermouth?
Yeah it’s dirty, filled with olives, dry and shaken not stirred
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It’s called Karma.
And it’s pronounced ‘Ha ha fuck you”.
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Romeo and Juliet is my favorite story about how when you fall in love, it's best to just kill yourself.
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