The Terrible Daughter

#TalesoftheFlobbed is out. My real story of growing up in the #CourtofKJ, a red-wine drenched domestic dictatorship run by one unpredictable, green-jumpered tyrant with delusions of grandeur and a black belt in gaslighting. #TheTerribleDaughter theterribledaughter.substack.com

Every Christmas Eve, KJ would “fix” the working boiler, and break the heating. We’d open presents in winter coats, hairdryers under blankets, while he drank boxed red wine. theterribledaughter.substack.com/p/the-pre-even… #TheTerribleDaughter #CourtofKJ

KJ eats two boiled eggs a day for youth, but grazes on them for 12 hours. As the house fills with a sickening stench, he barks: 'Eggs are very good for you.' theterribledaughter.substack.com/p/the-all-day-… #TheTerribleDaughter

My father thinks the cleverest way to feed his garden is to pee on it. If anyone says anything he pops his hands on his hips and declares: 'I tell you what, this is what you call nature.” #CourtofKJ theterribledaughter.substack.com/p/the-garden-g…

In the #CourtofKJ, a trampoline is not play equipment. KJ uses it to launch himself to first-floor height, wave mid-air, and shout “HI GUYS!” before plummeting back down to earth. If this sounds normal to you, you’re in the right place. theterribledaughter.substack.com/p/the-airborne…

So pleased I divorced Daz, ahem Baz. I still need to figure out how to divorce my dad - @helendalby you know what Daz was like 🤣🤣 #CourtofKJ theterribledaughter.substack.com/p/the-royal-di…

In the #CourtofKJ, a child’s fatigue is not a concern, it’s a weakness that must be “trained out” through high-velocity discipline. theterribledaughter.substack.com/p/the-royal-fo…

Today’s #CourtofKJ features shrub theft, beach-based resource extraction, and a man who believes National Trust grounds are basically an underused supply chain. It’s called The Royal Groundskeeper, and yep, he really does think he’s saving money. theterribledaughter.substack.com/p/the-royal-gr…

Most men recover from a #vasectomy with frozen peas & dignity. KJ hobbled up the street like a battlefield survivor leading a march to view a new palace, When his own mother asked if he was okay, he spun round & bellowed: 'I HAVE HAD A VASECTOMY' theterribledaughter.substack.com/p/the-vasectom…

@rickygervais My dad sits in itchy knitwear on a carpet, self-satisfied after advising my ex-husband on tax fraud and telling him not to overthink fidelity, while stealing shrubs from stately homes. He calls it “the reality.” #flobbed

@AdrianEdmondson I’ve been writing about a man called KJ who thinks he’s a mogul but mainly steals rhododendrons.

#Flobbed (verb): to be emotionally steamrolled and then told you’re lucky it happened. The Terrible Daughter is here: theterribledaughter.substack.com

The audacity of a man sitting in itchy knitwear on a carpet, completely self-satisfied after advising his own son-in-law to commit tax fraud and cheat on his daughter. I'm the #terribledaughter for documenting it. theterribledaughter.substack.com/p/the-royal-di…

Welcome to The #CourtofKJ a domestic kingdom ruled by absolute certainty, unnecessary inspections, and increasingly disastrous DIY interventions. These stories are absurd, and, true. I AM the #TerribleDaughter #TrueStories #Memoir theterribledaughter.substack.com

@TPExpressTrains it took nearly ten hours from Newcastle to Liverpool today. Thanks for ruining my day

@ThomasCookUK tried to send feedback and your form sends me in circles

#Xodus I'm over on #BlueskySocial bsky.app/profile/jencla…

‘Essential to act now’ to prevent chaotic climate breakdown, warns UN chief theguardian.com/environment/20…

Read about @HeelToeCharity👣 @crowdfunderuk to support its specialised Rebound Therapy Project. drumbusinesspark.co.uk/news/heel-toe-… @DrumGroup Thank you @JenClairRobson

Talking to a friend of mine in his early 30s. He doesnt read or watch news at all. Just gets it off social media. Thinks Trump is funny and therefore good. Doesnt know what the left or right means. Doesnt know about climate change. Doesnt know about bots or disinformation. I think he represents a massive chunk of the population today. I dont think the media understands the way the world is changing at all.