Craigor Barbarian

My love language is potato

I actually speak 5 languages, and not one of them has a word for weirdos like you who eat bananas with a spoon.

@LIVINIGLIFE At this point it's Good luck and Godspeed. May the odds be ever in your favor.

@CraigorDammit They picked my two favorite things lettuce & raspberries. I'm completely disorganized at this point 😂

Damn. I have two different salads on the menu this week. Fuck it. Let's play butt roulette.

if u want a flat stomach u need to go to the grocery store ASAP and buy lettuce. eat it raw DO NOT COOK. thank me later

@Thebbie1 My Boy Scout training at work

I installed new hardwood flooring in my DMs for that extra slidability.

In honor of today’s t shirt I thought I’d share the time I wore it first. No one needs to see my brother’s mug.

Those bald folks fly on Receding Airlines

She sounds like the cholera basement ghost on that sitcom Ghosts. Iykyk

@LIVINIGLIFE Thanks! I got it last year for my dad's 80th birthday. We all dressed like it was the 80s.

@CraigorDammit Omg I have a MTV great shirt my friend.

Good morning I want my MTV

Some of my least favorite accounts are those that look at 20 year old tv shows with glaring plot holes and wonder how they could get away with it. I don't know man. Maybe because we all just enjoyed the shows rather than scrape every detail up and inspect it like Sherlock Holmes

@JustL2000 Thank you! Good morning ☕️

@CraigorDammit Great shirt! 🙌🏻good morning

I got two tickets to paradise. Pack your bags, We’ll leave tonight.

I used to have some audacity. It faded away.

Let’s see. A little about me: I’m 55 (56 next month) Born and raised in Ohio 6’2” 215 Excellent cook Part time wood worker Browns and Buckeye fan A bit of a know it all Total nerd Anything else? Just ask.

@CraigorDammit Rock and rolla cola wars, I can't take it anymore...

What’s your favorite line in We Didn’t Start the Fire? Mine is Space Monkey Mafia.

I shoulda got gas today. Might need a loan to fill up soon.