John Ʌ Konrad V@johnkonrad
Ryan wasn’t in this intervention at all, so it’s unfair to pin it on him.
But he reminds me that we had mutual friends who were very successful in tech & publishing.
At that level of success careers stretch into long plateaus punctuated by short meteoric rises when a book or app or movie breaks out. Many of these people are obsessed with breaking the plateaus.
They have remarkable methods for doing it. I learned a lot being around them. But each new level gets harder. The world tires of them. They run out of tricks.
At that point, most turn spiritual.
Another thing about very successful people of this sort: PTSD is rampant. Most carry childhood trauma. A few earned theirs through excessive drug use. Coping with PTSD is usually what teaches a Type A personality to compartmentalize and focus on the work. A spiritual awakening is seen not only as a way to reach a new level, but to heal the soul.
I grew up in the Bronx during the height of its troubles. Riding the firetruck to a five-alarm fire on my dad’s lap is one of my best childhood memories. In their minds, that was child abuse, no different from an infantry soldier dragging his kid into a combat zone.
The point: in their eyes, I had massive trauma to work through.
So a few of these friends staged an intervention. They were convinced I needed a spiritual awakening.
Problem was, I had been raised by a devout Catholic father, and my paternal grandfather was a Methodist minister. I had fallen far from the church, but I never cut the umbilical cord to Jesus.
So I resisted.
They weren’t pushing any single solution. The menu was wide: Buddhist, Taoist, Wiccan, deep meditation, Jewish, Muslim, tantric, DIY yoga.
“Any path you want.” There was no overt anti-Christian pressure. Jesus simply wasn’t discussed. If someone brought him up, faces would tighten, & the conversation moved on.
Thankfully, I resisted. Two reasons.
First, many who “find inner peace” lose all drive to succeed.
Second, a few months before the intervention someone entirely outside this group m tried to recruit me into a full satanic temple in LA. I rejected it flat out, and the experience left me repulsed by any spirituality on offer.
The lighter advances like were easy to push off. You’re encouraged to experiment, find the one that “fits your soul.” They’re open to any new age method that delivers focus, connection, and inner peace.
But here’s the thing: I never felt broken inside. I had witnessed trauma as a kid & at sea, but it never settled into my soul.
So I rejected the quest. Not for others, just for me. “Not for me, but if it works for you, go for it.” I did read most of the major religious and new age texts but out of intellectual curiosity, not personal need.
Many years later, I found my way back into the church. Back into the embrace of Jesus.
I’m not writing this to shame anyone or to convince you to believe in Jesus yourself. I’m writing because today it’s abundantly clear what was going on.
Jesus hasn’t offered me inner peace. The trauma still speaks loudly in my soul. Jesus offered me love and truth, not peace. If anything, he opened my eyes to more tragedy & pain around me. I don’t think a retreat in Sedona could cure my inner pain.
Love is pain.
The spiritualism DOES “work” for these people , but for a very specific reason.
The ptsd events were encounters with real evil. The demons are still there, causing turmoil & psychological pain. I can manage my own demons because I know they have no power over my love of Jesus. They are an annoyance. They do not rule my mind.
What happens on these inner spiritual journeys is simple. To accept the peace, you have to believe in the process. In doing so, you implicitly reject Jesus. The demons causing turmoil in the soul of these people are satisfied by that rejection & stop stoking the ptsd, knowing they have won.
“Inner peace” is the demons giving up on you because they have won
Because the opposite of love isn’t hate, it’s apathy.
