Porch Drinkin'

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Porch Drinkin'

Porch Drinkin'

@DarylMoore

It's me, that guy who does the stuff and things.

Earth, Solar System, Milky Way Katılım Şubat 2009
846 Takip Edilen170 Takipçiler
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Porch Drinkin'
Porch Drinkin'@DarylMoore·
Video is so easily faked these days, why aren't camera makers embedding checksums or crypto hashes to prove video is taken from the camera and not post-edited / modified? It shouldn't be long before all video evidence can simply be discounted as too easily faked.
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Elon Musk
Elon Musk@elonmusk·
Try using @Grok for your taxes!
jimmah@jamesdouma

.@grok just saved my sister $1,441 on her taxes. I had it check the turbotax output and it found a mistake. Seriously - 4.20 is very good with taxes.

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Mr. Mike
Mr. Mike@mrmikeMTL·
What's the story behind your username?
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NewsManJack
NewsManJack@BreakingNewsNik·
If I am paying for @x now and I am getting this many ads then what's happening to you fucks that aren't paying for x?
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Porch Drinkin'
Porch Drinkin'@DarylMoore·
@ZelleSupport @Zelle When clients look up my Zelle they are presented with a name that differs from what they expect. My bank said they cannot change what you show them. It's not a transaction (although I also have a large transaction pending now for several days.) 😠
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Zelle Support
Zelle Support@ZelleSupport·
We’re sorry you’re getting the runaround. Zelle has no access to customer accounts or transactions. We suggest reaching back out to your bank or credit union and mention it’s about a Zelle transaction so they can route you to the correct team. You may want to ask to speak to a supervisor. Sorry we can’t be of more help.
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Porch Drinkin'
Porch Drinkin'@DarylMoore·
Hey @Zelle my bank says I have to contact you to solve a problem and your website says I have to solve it through my bank. You provide exactly zero methods to contact you on your website. Exactly what am I supposed to do?
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Porch Drinkin'
Porch Drinkin'@DarylMoore·
@ZelleSupport @Zelle And they told me the issue is with Zelle and they can do nothing about it. They told me to contact you.
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Zelle Support
Zelle Support@ZelleSupport·
@DarylMoore @Zelle Hello, thanks for reaching out. We’re sorry for the frustration. Zelle doesn’t have access to individual accounts or transactions. Only your bank or credit union can review your details and help. Please contact them directly using the number on the back of your card.
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unusual_whales
unusual_whales@unusual_whales·
At 30, you should have retirement savings worth one year of your annual income, and double that by age 35, according to Fidelity. By 60, the typical worker should have eight times their annual income socked away for their retirement. By 67, you should have 10 times your income saved. Do you agree?
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Porch Drinkin'
Porch Drinkin'@DarylMoore·
Today the AI I put in charge of my corporation laid me off. It said I ask too many stupid questions. The AI fired all staff and opened subscriptions to six other AI tools to replace them. But I'll get the last laugh. I put fish on the counter in the break room before I left.
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Raven
Raven@Ravenismeee·
Name a career that AI can’t steal
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Porch Drinkin'
Porch Drinkin'@DarylMoore·
@gothburz This post is not believable because there are too many capital letters.
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Peter Girnus 🦅
Peter Girnus 🦅@gothburz·
Last Tuesday I fired four thousand people. Half the company. I wrote the memo on Monday night. I used the word "leaner" three times. "Leaner" is a word that means fewer people. But it sounds like a fitness goal. The board approved it in one meeting. Nobody asked which four thousand. Including me. I said we were "streamlining to focus on what matters." What matters is the stock price. The stock went up twenty-three percent. Twenty-three percent. That's the biggest single-day jump in the company's history. Not when we launched Cash App. Not when we hit a billion in revenue. When we fired half the people who built those things. The market rewarded us for becoming lighter. I used that word too. Lighter. Like we put the company on a diet. The diet was four thousand people. HR asked how we'd handle the transition. I said we'd "leverage AI to maintain operational velocity." They nodded. Operational velocity is not a real metric. But it sounds like one. A VP asked which teams were being cut. I said "the ones AI can replace." She asked which ones AI can replace. I said "we're still evaluating." We are not still evaluating. We already decided. The answer is "whichever ones cost the most." We kept the AI team. Fourteen people. They replaced four thousand. On paper. In reality they built a chatbot that answers internal IT questions. Most employees still email Dave in IT. Dave was laid off. The chatbot's name is also Dave. That was not intentional. But nobody changed it. We told the remaining employees this was "a new chapter." New chapters are what companies call layoffs. The previous chapter was "unprecedented growth." That chapter employed four thousand more people. Jack wrote a blog post. He said the company was "returning to its roots." The roots did not include four thousand people. The roots are a mobile payment app and a man with a nose ring who posts philosophy on Twitter. The blog post got twelve hundred likes on LinkedIn. Mostly from people who fire other people for a living. The severance package was twelve weeks. Twelve weeks to find a new job in a market where everyone is "leveraging AI to maintain operational velocity." A senior engineer asked in the all-hands why we couldn't cut executive compensation instead. He suggested we start with the $42 million in stock grants. We thanked him for his candor. His position was eliminated the next morning. His role has been absorbed by a "cross-functional AI workstream." The workstream does not exist yet. But it's on a roadmap. Roadmaps are how companies prove things will happen later so they don't have to prove them now. CNBC called it "bold." Bloomberg called it "decisive." An analyst at Morgan Stanley upgraded us to "overweight." Overweight means buy more. The company is lighter. The stock is heavier. The people who built the thing are gone. The thing is still here. The stock price says that's an improvement. I'm presenting at an investor conference next week. The title of my talk is "Building a Leaner, AI-Native Organization." I will stand on a stage and explain how removing half the company made the company better. The audience will applaud. They always do. They own the stock.
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Porch Drinkin'
Porch Drinkin'@DarylMoore·
Imagine being so full of yourself you refuse to use capital letters while you fire 4,000 people.
jack@jack

we're making @blocks smaller today. here's my note to the company. #### today we're making one of the hardest decisions in the history of our company: we're reducing our organization by nearly half, from over 10,000 people to just under 6,000. that means over 4,000 of you are being asked to leave or entering into consultation. i'll be straight about what's happening, why, and what it means for everyone. first off, if you're one of the people affected, you'll receive your salary for 20 weeks + 1 week per year of tenure, equity vested through the end of may, 6 months of health care, your corporate devices, and $5,000 to put toward whatever you need to help you in this transition (if you’re outside the U.S. you’ll receive similar support but exact details are going to vary based on local requirements). i want you to know that before anything else. everyone will be notified today, whether you're being asked to leave, entering consultation, or asked to stay. we're not making this decision because we're in trouble. our business is strong. gross profit continues to grow, we continue to serve more and more customers, and profitability is improving. but something has changed. we're already seeing that the intelligence tools we’re creating and using, paired with smaller and flatter teams, are enabling a new way of working which fundamentally changes what it means to build and run a company. and that's accelerating rapidly. i had two options: cut gradually over months or years as this shift plays out, or be honest about where we are and act on it now. i chose the latter. repeated rounds of cuts are destructive to morale, to focus, and to the trust that customers and shareholders place in our ability to lead. i'd rather take a hard, clear action now and build from a position we believe in than manage a slow reduction of people toward the same outcome. a smaller company also gives us the space to grow our business the right way, on our own terms, instead of constantly reacting to market pressures. a decision at this scale carries risk. but so does standing still. we've done a full review to determine the roles and people we require to reliably grow the business from here, and we've pressure-tested those decisions from multiple angles. i accept that we may have gotten some of them wrong, and we've built in flexibility to account for that, and do the right thing for our customers. we're not going to just disappear people from slack and email and pretend they were never here. communication channels will stay open through thursday evening (pacific) so everyone can say goodbye properly, and share whatever you wish. i'll also be hosting a live video session to thank everyone at 3:35pm pacific. i know doing it this way might feel awkward. i'd rather it feel awkward and human than efficient and cold. to those of you leaving…i’m grateful for you, and i’m sorry to put you through this. you built what this company is today. that's a fact that i'll honor forever. this decision is not a reflection of what you contributed. you will be a great contributor to any organization going forward. to those staying…i made this decision, and i'll own it. what i'm asking of you is to build with me. we're going to build this company with intelligence at the core of everything we do. how we work, how we create, how we serve our customers. our customers will feel this shift too, and we're going to help them navigate it: towards a future where they can build their own features directly, composed of our capabilities and served through our interfaces. that's what i'm focused on now. expect a note from me tomorrow. jack

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aka
aka@akafaceUS·
Noticing that a child rode by his garage every day, a man decided to draw a track outside so the child could enjoy himself as he passed.
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Jeff Kowalsky
Jeff Kowalsky@JeffKowalsky·
@Breaking911 How do you pay for police, fire departments snd infrastructure?
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Breaking911
Breaking911@Breaking911·
The Florida House voted 80–30 to abolish all non-school property taxes for homeowners.
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Porch Drinkin'
Porch Drinkin'@DarylMoore·
The Hammond Ursus, aka "Big Dippers" is the name being floated for the renewed franchise. #chicagobears #bears
NFC North News@NFCNorthNewss

🚨🚨BREAKING: The #Bears have officially committed to a building a new stadium in Northwest Indiana. Originally the team stated that if they moved states they would retain the “Chicago Bears” tag but after the new agreement with state officials that is no longer the case. The Chicago Bears franchise will end with only one superbowl despite being one of the oldest franchises in NFL history. Heartbreaking. 💔💔💔

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not today satan
not today satan@tanylake·
Fruit just kinda sucks now. When was the last time you had a knock-your-socks-off good piece of fruit? For me it was a strawberry from a Mennonite market years ago
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