Andrew Whitney

WELCOME TO THE HALL OF FAME! 🐻 Kenzie Williams 🐻

@JoeMercurio77 It’s hard enough lookin at one of you

Can I commission someone to make me a head that looks like me? I'm sick of never having a + 1 to weddings 😒

@Bailey_Shea Coincidentally it means “the essentials” in Latin.....

@DoThe_Drew Sounds like a stool softener or allergy medicine.. which makes sense coming from you.

Seems like pharmaceutical companies just put random vowels between every random consonant in order to name a medication (i.e. ofatumamab, melatonin, ativan, humira, xanax, loratadine). Drop your hypothetical life-saving drug name below. Mine's wuzupuranus

That’s the moon

@Blanar56 Let’s gooooo!!!

@DoThe_Drew Word just hit you with the follow

The best part of the day is when the trainer on the peloton app tells me they’re proud of me 🥲

@Blanar56 Ayyy! It’s andrewwhitney

@DoThe_Drew Need that username dawg

@EliWhit @News3Adam How long were you in school?

@News3Adam Do these count? 1966 thru 1986

You’re not a Mizzou grad unless you have one of these three cups in your pantry

@jvalentin3 I am in my living room 24 hours a day

@DoThe_Drew Lol are you back in the office

*gets out of bed at 7:57 instead of the usual 8:06* Well, guess I’ll get to work early today.

@GrahamarNazi Just nuts innit

@DoThe_Drew Can confirm. It's: Pre-K Kindergarten Grade School Middle School High School

Why does everyone from St. Louis call elementary school “grade school” ????? Ain’t nothing wrong with it but there is definitely something wrong with it

@devidy_duncan Yeah you and your people should be in jail for that

@prettyp222 I’m mad you even shared this cuz I just wasted 6 minutes of my life

My brain scrambled trying to read this 😂😂😂

Maddie told me if I ever saw josh hawley in person and punched him in the face that she would pay my bond and legal fees 💕

No one even remembers that 2020 was also the year where Ronaldinho spent 32 days in jail 😞

Ok but what is bon iver even saying

@AustinDoyle15 Remember when I told you to do this in May last year

@DJ_BluJay 🤣🤣🤣

@DoThe_Drew youve had the xbox like a week

I got suspended from Xbox live for 3 days for cussing and the president got suspended from Twitter for 12 hours for inciting a coup 😞