Eryn

computa make everyone be my friend

starting the second half of your sandwich is like hell yeah baby let’s run it back

you can tell a person's in a very dark place when a fortune cookie means a lot to them

starting tomorrow im gonna be super normal funny sexy kind and functioning

Turns out I’m happier when there’s nothing on my bedroom floor

I am the hottest person from rows 21-33 on this plane

sorry i cant :( i have to do my laundry and then walk around for 6 hours

spent two hours picking out what movie to watch and now it’s too late to start it

i find that being around children cures me of all neuroticism

They were playing geese in banana republic

Me in the office

I can tell that it’s causing discomfort when I refuse to look at my phone idly in public spaces. But I’m trying to bring back just looking around

when they bring up chatgpt around me so now i have to hit them with the face

WAKE UP FROM YOUR FUCKING NAP

Why are the standards higher for The Bachelorette than the President of the United States?

I was doing like an advanced kind of joke where it isnt funny

i hate a “who even still uses twitter” ass bitch bc what are you laughing at if not donna kelce renovation tweets

U say something funny and guys r like hmm.. it would be so funny if someone said that

I just want to be TAN and TIPSY with a HOT DOG at a BASEBALL GAME

I feel like god is calling me to spend a bunch of money online shopping today