Mum of one

Please follow my new account for my artwork. I shall try not to flood this account any longer. @Ange__Art

@Jingerella66 It was one of those red bastards

@Emmm_Aye What kind of ants have you got?

Just took a fleece off the line and put it on me and a solitary fucking ant bit me all over and around my fucking armpit, the little shitehawk!! Agony and itching like fuck. Needless to say, it is Ant-hony's wake in my bathroom tonight where he met his crushing demise!!

@Emmm_Aye For future reference

@rackandrule Little nippy shite!! Deserved all he got!

@Emmm_Aye ANTOCIDE! 🐜 😂😂

@RoundLike She's lucky she's cute.

@Emmm_Aye Beautiful

I have my own little fucking terrorist.

@SqueakySays I can see into your very dark, deep soul. Do not recommend.

@Emmm_Aye can you see me with those contact lenses 🙄

Bloods coming back tomorrow. Am I dead yet?

Shit show incoming.

@fenlandflo He's still breathing, so yes.

I’ve just got back from the vets. Has he embarrassed us further while I’ve been out?

Let's check in on Gerald the Planet Killer. Gerald is a four-year-old Hereford cross in a field near Ledbury. He weighs about 600 kilograms. He has been busy this morning. 6:14am - Woke up. Began destroying the planet by eating grass. 7:02am - Continued environmental catastrophe by walking slowly toward the water trough. 8:45am - Committed a war crime against the atmosphere by exhaling. 9:30am - Did a pat. In a field. Where it will become part of a complex nutrient cycle that has been running successfully since before humans existed. 11:00am - Grazed a section of meadow, inadvertently aerating the soil with his hooves, spreading seeds in his dung, creating habitat for dung beetles, and sequestering carbon through the root systems his grazing stimulates. Noon - Had a lie down. The scientists monitoring Gerald's methane output have calculated that this methane, derived from grass pulled from British soil, is part of a carbon cycle that has been net neutral for ten thousand years of continuous cattle domestication. They have not been asked to present this finding anywhere. Gerald is unavailable for comment. He is destroying a particularly threatening patch of ryegrass on the south side of the field. Someone stop him.

W. W. Wwwwwwww Oh, it does ork.

It's fucking baltic. Thailand for to weeks looks very inviting.

I prefer the term cashier tbf

@2LivesCid @realmocktheleft I have those too

@Emmm_Aye @realmocktheleft Don’t do it. Buy some sexy spectacles instead

Haven't worn contact lenses in almost 20 years after an unforgettable encounter with corneal ulcers. Today I bite that bullet.

@realmocktheleft Fair.

@Emmm_Aye You are a blind muskrat though.

Sitting outside trave agents. Wonder if they'll do me a good middle east deal.

@minimooey Thanks x

@Emmm_Aye Good luck

@AngryExile Sabbatical. Life etc.

@Emmm_Aye Oh, hello. Thought you’d disappeared off of Twxttxr.

@realmocktheleft I'm not a fucking big fanny bag like you. That's how.

@Emmm_Aye Would rather walk around like a blind Muskrat than put pieces of glass or plastic in my eyes. Yack! Don't know how you can face doing that.

@SqueakySays Morning!

@Emmm_Aye Helloooo!