Fejfar

Remember the episode where Spongebob starts crying to his grandma because he wants to be a kid again? Now after having been in the real world for a while I can 100% see how a breakdown like that is possible.

United Airlines has got to be the absolute worst company in the known universe

Some people just shouldn't have licenses

Why can't we retire at like 32 instead of 65

I haven't played musical chairs in about 2 decades, and the idea of it still stresses me the fuck out

"FIeLdS iSnT gOoD" ~Everyone

Verizon owes me so much money it's not even funny

Shoutout to my HS Spanish teachers for giving me some of the skills needed to successfully book a tattoo in Chile

@aGlitterTree If I was artistically gifted, I would start this business myself! I think it'd be hilarious

@Fejfar4 you're onto something

A tattoo studio where you just pick 3 random words out of a hat, and that's the tattoo you get. Like: Apple, Moped, Goatee

People in DC will straight up run a red light just to be stuck at the next one a block away

It's mid August stop with this Halloween display shit @ all grocery stores

Can you say "scouts honor" if you've never been a scout? Asking for a liar

Thank god Rihanna invented umbrellas

Difference between my gf and I scrolling through social media: Her: "What do you think of this wedding setup?" Me: "Look at this orangutan driving a golf cart"

An updated list of companies/entities that owe me money: United Airlines Alaskan Airlines Verizon DC DMV

Great date idea: spend the day doing whatever billboards you pass tell you to do

Why does all hold music have a saxophone

Imagine having a job where you could be wrong about literally everything all the time. Oh wait there is one it's called a weatherman

The person in front of me just ordered an iced coffee with TEN creamers. I'm not sure who to call to give this woman the help she needs

If Jesus were alive today, he'd probably say the Latin equivalent of, "wtf is this dumbest fish symbol thing you all have on the back of your cars?"