HaikuGuru

Are you counting the Syllables while you read this Or do you trust me?

Everytime he sees a new movie. Every. Time.

When it rains it pours So I guess it’s raining on My face cause WOW pores!!

It may be end times, but these boys are always prepared. Don’t let their superstitions fool you, these rascals are in deep with the Elder Gods. So kick back, consult the bones and watch our newest sketch: “Superstitious Party youtu.be/PqFQAcSBDYQ PS: Goats are yum, yum!

I was on-book for The Little Mermaid recently—what a mess

Man, I go to work True winner—jeans skinny, like Squidward; Cat Daddy.

Kinda regret getting the new #AnimalCrossing ://

I wanted to hear Funky Town—so guess what, love? I played Funky Town.

Wow, I miss my wife. I miss my wife so, so much. It physically hurts.

Cover your mouth when You sneeze, cough, or someone says “Who has teeth? Gimme!”

Imagine how much Hotter I would be if I Was better looking

May not have gotten A Valentine, but will you Be my Quarantine?

Times are tough right now. They are. But there is a sliver of hope. “Tribute” by @tenaciousd is almost at 100,000,000 plays on @Spotify If we pull together—if we unite—we can get them there. THIS is our Pick of Destiny. Let’s do this!#Tribute #RoadTo100M @jackblack @gassleak

Call me old fashioned— Seriously. I dare you. Just see what happens.

Our firsts new sketch is on YOUTUBE at this very moment! A local celebrity drops by to visit our living room and make new friends :) youtu.be/dWlqfSANYnw

Birds are not cute so Please stop making memes as if They’re remotely sweet

Brazil doesn’t want Your baked ziti potluck dish So STOP sending it!!

I’m a cow, baby. Moo moo. Moo-oo-oo baby. I’m just a damn cow.

@PeteONeill12 @JacobCorsaro Do you want to see These damn hands or what, my man? Don’t fuck with the frog

How wild is it That we all know the Can-Can? Truly all of us.

Dear Evan Hansen, Today I was turned on by Milk. Sincerely, Me.