JAYDIOHEAD

@emmanueladda2 Water has nothing to do with getting clean. Neither anything besides time and body fat content really. Honestly, if you have a year's worth of smoking stored in your body fat and you exercise and burn fat it will REmetabolize stored THC into your pee test yourself weekly. Amazon.

I smoke weed everyday for abt a year now and im gonna get drug tested EXACTLY one month from today do i have enough time???

Just watched Star Trek 2 for the dozenth time. Pretty cool to see Spock on the streets of San Francisco. #MovieClassics

@NeilNevins His dad said he could sell the shit-tube

Alex Jones watching Tim and Eric clips thinking the Cinco Corporation is real

@NeilNevins The Cinco brothers are some of the most corrupt.

@RealAlexJones Electric Sun 20! Look in to Dr.San and the ",China Connection". Corrupt to the bone!

The Onion newspaper has been rocked by the discovery that their new creative director, produced pro pedo/child kidnapping, torture and murder programs. Billionaire Michael Bloomberg is the main financier of the Onions hostel takeover of Infowars and is funding productions designed, in their words “to wear Alex Jones skin.” Below is an actual mug shot of the creep..

Me on @OCATCOfficial Oscar Special night

@Forty1_0 Technology exists that measures it for the doctors

How tf do doctors know babies prescription if they can’t tell them what they can & can’t see???

@OhRyanMead Stromed it

I've seen this before.

@MurrayHillGuy1 RIP St Marks

Everyone in NYC needs to be outside today… It’s 45 degrees, this is basically heaven St marks street is already insane at 2 pm Rage before the snow storm Spring is coming People are horny for the sun

@Harriwxu3 Gotta turn left to go right

My little brother’s suitcase turns sooooo smoothly 😎

@KenRETFCCM @am4rrt 0 delegates

@am4rrt She should stand aside and make room for Harris to have a clear run at it, she is the candidate we deserve!

@latterdaylaura Justwait until you pick them up and they look you in the eye and say "Dada" *pokes nose* "Nose".

Tired of all the “just wait until they wake up screaming at 2 am” comments. Give me your best positive just waits. Like, just wait until they’re 9 and you get to show them some of your favourite movies and watch their reactions and laugh together at Nacho Libre squeezing his glutes

@HardBarn Boomers

Everytime I’m at the CVS pharmacy drive thru, I sit behind cars for at least 10-15 minutes… yet when I’m at the window I’m gone in less than 2 minutes every single time. Can someone legitimately explain to me why this is? What could possibly take so long?

@xandoys Life is a mystery

The teachers union must be disbanded!

@simphiweyinkoc_ Copy and paste the original message and reply without a change.

How do you say “did I stutter?” in corporate language

@Syrup_Tishus That's how they get Dasani so grey.

Guys, I found out how they make Dasani.

just sitting here trying to figure out which of these best represents the Democratic Party right now

@its_adamneely Tepetition Regitimizes

hm