Jacob Liam Wagner

I guess Parker was a fussy baby. Well, he’s /still/ a fussy baby.

*Jake slides his wedding present, a sketch, under the door for @BornInCaldecott and @ChargedDeck and sneaks off.*

@HellionTK @__Wildcard__ I’m glad everyone throughout time knows you’re the worst, Oli.

@__Wildcard__ @JakeBamf Ew!

It’s too bad @__Wildcard__ isn’t still here. The past is weird.

@__Wildcard__ Ugh, I have a headache. *He rubbed his temple.* So why are you here anyway? Did all the rugrats annoy you so much you had to escape?

@JakeBamf Well, Mom thought that @HellionTK was playin' some sorta joke or something. Pops handled it pretty well. As well as he could I guess. [shrugs]

@__Wildcard__ No, he definitely did not... How did your parents take it when you told them about you?

@JakeBamf Did he...y'know...know about you an' Nina?

@__Wildcard__ Awkward, goofy, makes bad jokes. I really freaked him out when he realized who I am.

@JakeBamf [Shoves his hands in his pockets.] So...what's he like?

I mean the name “Speedball” doesn’t really scream cool.

@__Wildcard__ *Jake paused.* You ever imagine someone for years and build them up in all these different, larger-than-life ways. Then you actually see them and they’re just normal and small? It’s like that.

@JakeBamf Yeah? And?

@__Wildcard__ She’s totally obsessed with finding our dad. *Jake sighed.* I’d say she’s completely lost it, but her stupid plan worked... I found him.

@JakeBamf ...Yeah, that sounds about right. She hung around that Stark kid too much.

@__Wildcard__ My crazy sister made a time portal and freakin’ pushed me in.

@JakeBamf What're you doin' here anyway, Jake?

@__Wildcard__ Yeah, I saw my mom. She looks so young. That was definitely surreal.

@JakeBamf It's...definitely weird. Surreal? Is that the word?

@__Wildcard__ Wait, seriously? *He paused.* Doesn’t it freak you out to see things you only heard in stories happen right in front of you?

@JakeBamf Yup. Mom an' Pops. Although I coulda told 'em that was gonna happen.

@__Wildcard__ *He swatted his cousin’s hand away.* I guess I got distracted while I was trying to sneak. I heard someone got married.

@JakeBamf [puts his index finger to Jake's forehead and gives a little push] I wasn't sneakin'. Get your head outta the clouds.

@__Wildcard__ Gah! *Jake’s voice cracked as he jumped.* It’s not cool to sneak up on people, Oli.

@JakeBamf You rang?

@BouncingFury *In a nervous gesture Jake’s hand combed through his hair. He glanced at Robbie to make sure this wasn’t all some weird joke. With a steadying breath he gingerly slid down into the darkness.*

@JakeBamf Yeah, she's not a big fan of 'em. [After feeling through his dark closet a bit, Robbie tugged on a lightbulb string which triggered the back walls of his closet to open up. Revealing what seemed to be the beginning of some sort of giant slide.] You first, kiddo.

@BouncingFury I’m assuming that’s before you met my mother, the music snob. *Jake glanced around and his eyes caught a familiar band shirt, one he’s seen TJ wear on occasion. Usually depressed occasions.*

@BouncingFury *Jake gave him a side-eyed look. Given his own height, he kinda had to look up at Robbie. How did this dingdong manage to get with Mom?* Um...nice.

@BouncingFury *Jake stumbled out of the car and looked up at the building.*

@BouncingFury This is the weirdest day of my life. *He murmured under his breath and slouched further into the seat.*