adam$ Josh Mvmphv

Laugh zone ni oo😀😀 👇👇👇👇 Desmond Elliot was my classmate at the university. We both studied Economics. He was flamboyant and a young Christian cell leader. He was calm and lovable back then. He also carefully selected his friends, he was never really a man of the people, but of a selected few. I guess that is still how he operates in politics today. 👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇 Gbajabiamila’s Office. Abuja. Closed-door meeting. Desmond Elliot walks in wearing a spotless white agbada so bright it could direct traffic. Desmond: “Good afternoon sir. You sent for me?” Gbajabiamila: “Sit down, Desmond.” Desmond sits confidently. Crosses leg. Adjusts cap. Smiles like man coming to collect endorsement. Gbajabiamila leans back. Gbajabiamila: “How many years have you been in the House of Assembly?” Desmond: “Twelve years sir. Three solid terms.” Gbajabiamila: “Excellent. Now tell me… what exactly did you build?” Desmond freezes. Desmond: “Sir?” Gbajabiamila: “Projects, Desmond. Physical things. Things human beings can touch. What did you build?” Desmond clears throat. Desmond: “Well sir, I sponsored 11 motions…” Gbajabiamila: “Can people live inside motions?” Desmond: “No sir.” Gbajabiamila: “Continue.” Desmond: “I also co-sponsored 42 motions…” Gbajabiamila: “Did any of the motions become a bridge?” Desmond: “Not exactly sir.” Gbajabiamila: “Road nko?” Desmond: “No sir.” Gbajabiamila: “Hospital?” Desmond: “No sir.” Gbajabiamila: “Drainage?” Desmond: “Sir… technically…” Gbajabiamila: “Desmond!” Desmond quickly changes strategy. Desmond: “Sir I also launched a 198-page book titled My Surulere Journey: Twelve Years of Impact and Strategic Legislative Synergy.” Gbajabiamila stares at him like NEPA bill. Gbajabiamila: “So after twelve years… you gave the people homework.” Silence. AC temperature suddenly drops. Gbajabiamila: “From Bank Olemo to Masha to Iponri, the people are complaining.” Desmond: “Sir opposition propaganda. Sponsored attacks.” Gbajabiamila: “You said the same thing during the #EndSARS protest.” Desmond: “Sir that one was misunderstood.” Gbajabiamila: “And the potholes?” Desmond: “Natural disaster sir.” Gbajabiamila rubs forehead. Gbajabiamila: “Desmond, do you know I personally begged Surulere to accept you in 2015?” Desmond nods aggressively. Gbajabiamila: “Obasanjo called Tinubu. Tinubu called me. I called party leaders. Everybody joined hand to package you like Big Brother contestant.” Desmond: “And I remain forever grateful sir.” Gbajabiamila: “Grateful for what? You inherited a political mansion and turned it into photo studio. Every project they praise in Surulere today, I built before you arrived. You spent twelve years posting captions.” Desmond goes quiet. Very quiet. Even his agbada looks ashamed. Desmond softly: “Sir… if I offended anybody in any way whatsoever concerning anything somehow related to everything… I am sorry.” Gbajabiamila: “You don’t even know what you did wrong.” Desmond: “Sir I am apologizing in advance and in arrears.” Another silence. Gbajabiamila: “I have found your replacement.” Desmond sits up immediately. Desmond: “Replacement ke?” Gbajabiamila: “Her name is Barakat Odunuga-Bakare.” Desmond blinks twice. Desmond: “Sir… a woman?” Gbajabiamila: “Is Surulere allergic to women?” Desmond: “No sir. I just thought experience would matter.” Gbajabiamila: “Twelve years of what? Ring light and Instagram captions?” Desmond nearly chokes. Desmond: “Sir what happens to my fourth term?” Gbajabiamila: “What about it?” Desmond: “Can I still contest?” Gbajabiamila: “Nigeria is a democracy. Anybody can contest.” Desmond’s face brightens immediately. Desmond: “Ah! So I still have your support?” Gbajabiamila: “Did I say that?” Desmond: “But you said I can contest.” Gbajabiamila: “And Manchester United can win Champions League. Both are technically possible.” Silence. Painful silence. Somewhere, a ceiling fan laughs quietly.