Keith Chalmers

@SamaHoole Could I add some hunter and gather mayonnaise?

Nobody has ever given a full-throated sales pitch for a tin of sardines. That is a market gap. Allow me. The tin is food-grade steel, lined, sealed, oxygen removed. The environment inside is more controlled than most restaurant kitchens you have eaten in happily and without incident. No preservatives. Canning is heat and the absence of oxygen. Just the fish, suspended exactly as they were the day the boat came in. The omega-3s survive it. Studies comparing fresh to tinned show no meaningful difference in EPA and DHA. The fish was caught, canned within hours, and the fatty acids went nowhere. The bones are edible. They have been sitting in olive oil long enough to become soft, and they are the calcium delivery mechanism the sardine built for itself. You eat them. That is the intended use. What the tin actually contains: EPA and DHA in immediately usable form. Selenium, iodine, B12, CoQ10, vitamin D, calcium, complete protein with every essential amino acid. Your protein shake has twenty-three ingredients. The sardine grew its own nutrition in the North Atlantic and asked for nothing. A food humans have eaten since before written history now apparently requires a defence. Buy the tin.

@SamaHoole If I eat too much fat (which isn't a massibe amount tbh) I dont sleep. Any reason for this? I'm slowly phasing in carnivore but the no sleep thing is difficult.

The average person: - Thinks a three-egg omelette is pushing it - Orders egg whites because the yolk is "where all the fat is" - Buys the 5% ground beef and feels quietly responsible about it - Sees the red label on the 20% ground beef and mentally files it under "occasional treat" - Trims the fat off their steak before it hits the pan - Drains the fat out of the pan after cooking because it "can't be good for you" - Switches to skimmed milk because full-fat "has more calories" - Uses spray oil instead of butter because it feels like the sensible option - Snacks at 10:30am because breakfast didn't hold them - Has been overweight, tired, and inflamed for a decade and assumes this is just getting older Don't be average.

@SamaHoole They said it about vaccines as well. Hopefully, this decade that facade will fall.

"The science is settled." They said that about lobotomies. Drilled into the skull, severed the frontal lobe, sent the patient home quieter. Twenty thousand performed in the US alone. The surgeon got a Nobel Prize. They said it about radium. Sold in toothpaste. In face cream. In water tonics for "vitality." The factories that made it left a radioactive legacy that required federal cleanup eighty years later. The women who painted the watch dials were told to lick the brush to keep a fine point. They said it about smoking during pregnancy. Doctors endorsed specific brands. Camel ran ads with physician testimonials. "More doctors smoke Camels than any other cigarette." The settled science of the 1940s. They said it about mercury for syphilis. Rub it on the skin. Inhale the vapour. The cure was frequently worse than the disease. The disease, at least, took years. The mercury took weeks. They said it about bloodletting. For two thousand years. Every major illness. Every fever. Every infection. Open the vein, release the corruption. George Washington was bled of roughly forty percent of his blood in twelve hours on his deathbed. By doctors. Who were certain. They said it about margarine. Heart-healthy. Scientifically proven. Cardiologist-approved. The trans fat content was not discussed, because the people funding the studies were not in the business of discussing trans fat content. They are now saying it about red meat. About saturated fat. About cholesterol. About the LDL hypothesis that has never survived a randomised controlled trial with all-cause mortality as the endpoint. Settled science is where investigation stops. It is also, reliably, where the funding starts.

@Alan_Watson_ @SamaHoole And they are more likely to be pegging you by date number 3. Peer reviewed studies also confirm the covid vaccine to be safe but thats also complete bollox

Keith, mate - the ‘soyboy’ panic was debunked years ago. Do keep up. 40+ clinical studies (including a 2021 meta-analysis in Reproductive Toxicology) show soy and plant-based diets have zero effect on testosterone, estrogen or male hormones. In fact, multiple peer-reviewed papers (NHANES, NYU Langone, Andrologia) link higher plant-food intake to lower risk of erectile dysfunction and better sexual function thanks to improved blood flow and endothelial health. Bonus dating maths: women are roughly twice as likely to be vegan/plant-based as men (Vegan Society 2025: 3.6% of UK women vs 1.9% of men). So the ‘liberal loony lefty ladies’ you’re worried about? Statistically far more likely to swipe right on a guy who actually eats plants 😉.

Chloe woke up at 6:45am and immediately felt proud of herself. She had, after all, not eaten a single animal product in four years. The planet was healing. She could feel it. 6:52am - Applied her morning SPF. The SPF contains beeswax. Chloe does not know this. Moving on. 7:10am - Breakfast: a smoothie containing avocado. The avocado was grown in Michoacán, Mexico, on land where a pine forest was until 2019. It required approximately 320 litres of water to produce. It was flown to the UK. Chloe sprinkled hemp seeds on top. The hemp seeds came from China. Chloe felt connected to the earth. 8:00am - Got dressed. Polyester leggings, derived from crude oil. A bamboo top that was processed using carbon disulphide in a Taiwanese chemical plant. Trainers with a recycled plastic upper that sheds microplastics into waterways with every wash. Chloe's outfit today had a higher carbon footprint than a ribeye steak. Chloe does not know this either. 9:30am - Posted on Instagram about choosing compassion. The phone was manufactured in a Shenzhen factory using cobalt from the DRC, where mining operations have displaced local communities and killed an unknowable number of small mammals, reptiles, and insects. The algorithm served Chloe an ad for oat milk. Chloe liked it. 12:00pm - Lunch: tofu stir-fry. The soy was grown in Brazil. Brazil produces more soy than almost any country on earth. The primary reason is soybean oil: one of the most widely used industrial and culinary oils on the planet. The soymeal left over after oil extraction is fed to livestock as a byproduct. Chloe is aware of the livestock connection and finds it outrageous. She has not looked into why the soy was grown in the first place. The answer is the oil. The oil is in her salad dressing. 1:30pm - Drove to the garden centre. The car runs on petrol. Chloe has a Just Stop Oil sticker on the bumper. This is not being commented on further. 3:00pm - Bought a monstera. The monstera was grown in a Dutch greenhouse using natural gas heating. Chloe put it next to the pothos that is slowly poisoning the neighbourhood cats. 6:00pm - Dinner: pasta with cashew cream sauce. The cashews were processed in Vietnam, often by workers in conditions that would prompt significant commentary if they were in an abattoir. 8:00pm - Watched a documentary about factory farming. Wept. Posted about it. Caption: "We have to do better." Chloe is, by every measure she has chosen to measure by, doing brilliantly. By some of the others, the picture is more complicated. Chloe has not chosen to measure by those.

@benjamincowen Weak men fell for the covid scam. Weak men allow the likes of Tony Blair to remain out of prison. Weak men are governed by people who are all over the epstein files.

Guess where we are now

@joeroganhq @TheOmniLiberal

Name a left-winger you'd like to see on Joe Rogan.

@joeroganhq Destiny

@SamaHoole Just had my hgv theory test today One question in the cpc section was. If Kevin wanted to remain healthy what should he avoid. Sunflower oil Fruit Vegetables Saturated fat. Nearly killed me having to tick the ultra wrong answer.

Your body runs on two fuels. Glucose and ketones. Every cell in your body can run on either. With one exception. Cancer cells have damaged mitochondria. Damaged mitochondria cannot process ketones. They run primarily on glucose, and to a lesser extent on glutamine, but ketones are off the menu entirely. This is called the Warburg Effect. It has been observed, documented, and replicated across multiple cancer types for nearly a century. PET scans, the imaging technology used to locate tumours, work by injecting radioactive glucose and watching where it concentrates. The glucose concentrates in the tumours. Because the tumours are consuming glucose at an accelerated rate. Because their broken mitochondria leave them almost no other choice. The PET scan works because cancer loves glucose. The dietitian recommending complex carbohydrates to cancer patients has had a PET scan explained to them. These two facts exist in the same hospital. On the same floor. They have not been introduced to each other.

@WilkieisBack66 Lenny Henry owes me reparations for having to watch his horrendous TV shows back when we only had 3 or 4 channels.

Slave reparations! I’m all in! I’ve decided to personally gift £1 million Sterling to every single person my family ever enslaved. Please form an orderly queue and bring: • Ironclad documents proving my family personally enslaved you (bonus points if they include my great-great-grandpa’s signature and a Polaroid). • Your birth certificate proving you were born before Britain abolished slavery on 1 August 1834. • Proof you’re still alive (the gift can only be claimed in person, no ghosts, no estates, no “my ancestor told me so”). Oh, and while you’re at it, maybe swing by the local cemetery with a shovel. I’m sure those poor souls buried since the 1800s would appreciate being dug up for their cheque. They’ve waited long enough, right? Look, if we’re doing “reparations” for historical slavery, let’s do it properly: only to the actual victims. Not their great-great-great-grandchildren who were born free in the 20th or 21st century, sipping oat milk lattes while tweeting about “trauma.” This isn’t justice, it’s a cosmic-level grift. It’s like demanding the Roman Empire pay for the roads they built because some distant ancestor got conquered by Caesar. Or billing modern Italians for every Gaul who got turned into a slave 2,000 years ago. Newsflash: No living person in Britain today was a slave under British law, and no living person in Britain today owned slaves under British law. The people who suffered are dead. The people who profited are dead. Their descendants, Black, White, Asian, mixed, whatever had zero say in it. Chasing “reparations” from random taxpayers (including the descendants of abolitionists, coal miners, and people who arrived after 1834) isn’t healing historical wounds. It’s creating new ones while opening the most hilarious Pandora’s box in human history: • Should Ireland demand reparations from Britain for the Potato Famine? • Should Britain demand reparations from Denmark for the Viking slave raids? • Should Italians bill Mongols for the sack of Baghdad? • Should every African nation start invoicing each other for the centuries of tribal warfare and slave-trading that predated (and supplied) the transatlantic trade? Where does the grievance chain end? 1066? The Bronze Age? Lucy the Australopithecus getting stiffed on her cave rent? Slavery was a universal human horror, practised by every civilisation from the Egyptians to the Aztecs to the Arabs to the Africans themselves (who sold millions into the trade). Britain didn’t invent it. Britain ended it, at massive cost, with the Royal Navy spending decades hunting slave ships while other empires kept right on going. Demanding cash from people who never owned slaves, to give to people who were never slaves, isn’t “reparations.” It’s retroactive time-travel cosplay with other people’s money. It’s the ultimate participation trophy for historical victimhood: “My ancestor suffered, therefore I deserve a payout… even though I live in a free society with more opportunity than 99.9% of humans who ever lived.” If you want actual justice, how about this radical idea: Stop obsessing over who owes whom from 200 years ago, and start judging people by what they do today. Work hard. Build. Create. Don’t inherit grievances like their family heirlooms. The desire for slavery reparations isn’t righteous anger. It’s lazy, entitled, historically illiterate greed dressed up as moral superiority, demanding a lottery win for a suffering you never endured, from people who never caused it. My £1 million offer stands. Just bring the paperwork. And a time machine. #Reparations #Slavery Oh, and fcuk you Lenny Henry.

@LizWebsterSBF @SamaHoole Wef bot 🤖

@SamaHoole We do produce a lot of lamb and export a big share of it. That’s the point. The sector depends on access to export markets, especially the EU. Brexit added friction and costs, so farmers now keep less of the value.

Britain is 110% self-sufficient in lamb. Let that sink in for a moment. Not "pretty good." Not "mostly fine." One hundred and ten percent. We grow more than we eat and export the rest. We have done this on permanent upland pasture that cannot be used for anything else, managed by farmers whose families have worked the same ground for generations, using animals that have been optimised for these conditions over centuries. 85% self-sufficient in beef. 100% in milk. 90% in eggs. The animal products on your plate, if you're eating in Britain, are almost certainly British. The supply chain is: farm, abattoir, butcher or supermarket. Measured in miles. Sometimes in tens of miles. Now. Your January strawberries are from Egypt. Your year-round peppers are from Spain or Morocco. Your salad leaves are from Israel in winter. Your green beans come from Kenya. Your blueberries are from Peru or Chile. They travel by refrigerated air freight, which is roughly fifty times more carbon-intensive per kilogram than road transport, to sit in a plastic clam shell next to a small flag and the word "fresh." The environmental argument against British animal products is not an environmental argument. It is a geography argument made by people who have not checked where their food comes from. Check where your food comes from.

@Alan_Watson_ @SamaHoole Someone has eaten too much soy and positioned himself as the ultimate white knight. She ain't gonna.....you know....even the Liberal loony lefty ladies dislike soyboys

Sama woke up at 6:45am feeling like the ultimate apex predator — because nothing screams “alpha male” quite like ordering 400g of pre-slaughtered ribeye on DoorDash while still in bed. Real men don’t count calories. They count carcasses. The planet? Burping methane like a frat boy after taco night. But hey, that’s just nature’s standing ovation for the carnivore king. 6:52am – Slathered beef tallow on his face. (Feedlot runoff poisoned Texas rivers, but at least his skin has that “ancestral glow”… and zero self-awareness.) 7:10am – 400g ribeye for breakfast. The cow lived in her own shit, farted enough to match his diesel truck, and died so he could flex on the timeline. He salted it like a conqueror claiming his spoils. Salt mined by destroying Utah aquifers. Classic Sama: dominating everything except his own hypocrisy. 8:00am – Dressed in wool from overgrazed hills, leather from a calf that never saw adulthood, and fossil-fuel sneakers. His outfit has a bigger land footprint than Chloe’s entire wardrobe. But real men don’t do “footprints.” They do carbon dominance — and then call women “weak” for choosing differently. 9:30am – Tweeted that vegans are the real animal killers. Phone made with the same child labour and conflict minerals as Chloe’s. Algorithm fed him grass-fed collagen ads. He liked it and admired his reflection: “Peak male performance.” 12:00pm – Bison patties for lunch. “Regenerative” on land where wild herds used to roam — until ranchers shot them all. Still needs Brazilian soy, the same fields he mocks Chloe for. But admitting that would require nuance, and nuance is for girls. 1:30pm – Drove his diesel truck to the gym. “Just Eat Local Meat” sticker proudly displayed, right next to the fragile male ego. 3:00pm – Bought another cast-iron skillet forged in toxic fumes and exploited labour. Added it to his knife collection sharpened with blood diamonds. Nothing screams “strong man” like tools built on suffering. 6:00pm – Dinner: liver, heart, bacon. Pigs smart enough to play video games, gassed to death for his “carnivore life, bro.” Plastic packaging will outlive him by centuries. But at least his testosterone feels high… or is that just the cognitive dissonance? 8:00pm – Watched a regenerative grazing doc, shed manly tears, posted: “We have to do better… by eating more steak.” Because the solution to environmental destruction is obviously doubling down - peak male logic. Sama measures success by how loud he chews and how many animals he “honours” with his fork. Legend status achieved. By every other metric - methane, water waste, habitat loss, slaughterhouse horror, plastic trash, and killing hundreds of sentient beings a year - he’s a walking eco-disaster with a superiority complex. But sure, keep calling Chloe the villain for her avocado. After all, real men don’t do nuance. They do steak… and misogyny.

@SamaHoole High amounts of fat cause me insomnia. Would this be because I'm not fat adapted yet and am consuming 2 different energy sources? Is there a way to switch without having to deal with insomnia for a period of time

If you're just starting carnivore, or you're thinking about it, here is the only thing you actually need to know: Fat is not optional. Fat is not a concession. Fat is not something to nervously add a little of and see how it goes. Fat is the entire mechanism. Your body runs on glucose or it runs on fat. These are genuinely different fuel systems with different hormonal environments, different energy characteristics, and different downstream effects on your mood, hunger, and body composition. You cannot run the fat system on lean meat. You will feel terrible and blame the diet. Choose the fattiest cuts you can find. Ribeye over sirloin. Lamb shoulder over lamb leg. 20% mince over 5% mince. Chuck over fillet. If you're cooking ground beef and there's fat in the pan at the end, stir it back in. Add butter. Add tallow. Add double cream to scrambled eggs. Don't drain the fat away and then wonder why you're hungry in two hours. This is the fuel source that made us human. Literally. The archaeological record is very clear on this: our brains grew, our guts shrank, and our cognitive capacity expanded in direct proportion to our access to large, fatty ruminant animals. We are, in a very specific biological sense, the product of animal fat. The fear of it is recent. The food pyramid is sixty years old. Your genome is two and a half million years old. Trust the older document.

Can confirm. Unreservedly

@elonmusk Depends, does it still think vaccines are safe and effective?

What are your initial impressions of Grok 4.20? Major upgrades are still landing every week.

@SamaHoole Sorry about the hedge

Keith the Apocalypse Bringer is a three-year-old Anglo-Nubian goat in a field in Devon. Keith should not be underestimated. Keith has been systematically dismantling the ecosystem since approximately 7am, when he ate a bramble. This is significant because bramble is an invasive scrub species that outcompetes wildflowers, reduces biodiversity, and creates dense monoculture thicket that nothing else can use. Keith ate it. Keith does this every day. Keith does not charge for this service. 8:15am - Keith ate a thistle. Thistles are also considered invasive scrub in managed pasture. Goldfinches eat thistle seeds, but Keith's grazing will ensure the pasture remains open enough for the ground-nesting birds that can't use dense scrub. Keith has not attended a conservation workshop. Keith arrived at this conclusion by being a goat. 9:00am - Keith dismantled a section of hedge. This was less helpful. Keith does not have a perfect record. 10:30am - Keith escaped the field. He was in the road for eleven minutes. He ate a neighbour's rose. This is not being counted in Keith's environmental impact assessment. 11:00am - Keith was returned to the field. Keith regarded the farmer with the specific expression of an animal that does not recognise the concept of property. 12:00pm - Keith ate more bramble. His digestive system: four stomachs, a rumen full of specialised microorganisms, the ability to extract nutrition from lignified plant matter that would defeat any other animal on this field, is converting scrub vegetation into milk with a fat content of approximately 4.5%. The milk will become cheese. The cheese will be sold at the farm shop. The farm shop is four miles away. The cheese food miles are: four. 3:00pm - Keith produced manure. The manure will grow the grass. The grass will grow the bramble. The bramble will be eaten by Keith. This system has no inputs. It has been running since goats were domesticated approximately ten thousand years ago. Keith is not aware he is saving the planet. Keith is thinking about whether the fence on the north side has a weak point. It does. Keith found it at 4:45pm. Keith got out again.

@SamaHoole Aren't eggs also high in vitamin A as well as dairy?

This is terrible advice. Yes, liver is nutrient-dense. Vitamin A, copper, B vitamins, iron. But here's what nobody mentions: Vitamin A toxicity is real. Copper accumulation is real. Liver stores toxins the animal was exposed to (that's literally its job). Eating liver weekly can lead to: - Hypervitaminosis A (joint pain, bone issues, vision problems) - Copper overload (especially if you have genetic susceptibility) - Consuming whatever pollutants the animal processed Beef does not have these problems. Liver can't replace it.

@nickylee121283 @RealAlexJones So far

@RealAlexJones Starmer protected Jimmy Saville ,King Charles friend and UK worse caught pedo

🚨🚨Learn the real reason King Charles brother Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor was arrested..🚨🚨

@VitalityInCont @SamaHoole Strange, for me, high fat stops me sleeping. If i ate butter id not sleep at all

@SamaHoole Cholesterol from animal foods actually helps lower high cortisol & stabilize the daily pattern. I used to eat butter when waking up due to dysregulated cortisol spiking too early at night—it calmed things down & helped me sleep through. High-fat is key for adrenal balance.

"Ketosis causes chronically elevated cortisol!" Low-carb diets raise resting cortisol levels... right up until the three-week adaptation mark, after which they return to normal. The initial cortisol spike stimulates gluconeogenesis to compensate for reduced incoming glucose. This is a temporary adaptation phase, not chronic dysfunction. Long-term carnivore does not raise cortisol unless you're chronically undereating, but that's a fault of the person, not the diet. Studies show normal cortisol levels after adaptation. TSH remains stable or decreases. No signs of HPA axis dysfunction. The "keto flu" people experience during adaptation (headaches, fatigue, irritability) is real. It's your body switching from decades of carb dependency to fat-burning pathways that have been dormant. But it's transient. Usually resolves within 2-4 weeks. Judge the diet by long-term markers, not adaptation turbulence. Carnivore doesn't create chronic stress. It eliminates the dietary stressors (sugar crashes, inflammation, gut irritation) that caused it.

@emilyhewertson Why would anyone want to sing about saving Jimmy saviles friend and Andrews brother (like he didnt know what they were like)

England either needs its own anthem (Jerusalem) or all of the United Kingdom should play God Save the King.