Lazy Dictator

@spurs Do NOT play Wemby if he is not healthy! DO NOT KILL THE MAN! No trophy is worth it!

@JimmyDean Re: Breakfast Sandwiches The sausage patties have no seasoning. It's not Jimmy Dean without them. Also, the patties need to be flame-broiled before being assembled with the sandwich

@AnimalPlanet In the way that you have the Puppy Bowl, you should also have the Animal Oscars - honoring animals who have acted in film & television

Waking up to find out what dumb shit the US has done today #ProjectSTUFI

@BanyanFoods Did you all change the recipe on your Classic Kimchi? The last two jars I've bought haven't tasted quite right. The spice is fine - but it doesn't taste "alive," you know what I mean?

#gravityfalls #fiddauthor

@Uber I cannot log into my Uber account, and nothing on the website is very helpful and helping me to get in

@sesameplaceca So when are we getting a Sesame Place in Texas? :3

@WillingBlam Actor Robert Duvall has passed away. I've always wondered - what did you do with the 50 bucks he gave you?

@DateEverything So when are we getting Fight Everything? All the same characters, just now a battle royale mode, lol

@DisneyPlus Did you guys do some weird HD upgrade to Hocus Pocus? It's way too smooth and it's giving me motion sickness 🤮

Listen, I'm just saying, that if #THC usage has brought me closer to #JesusChrist, than any attempt by the #USgovernment to curb my usage is a violation of my #FirstAmendment rights.

Attention @ToysRUs The people don't want the creepy one on the left. We want the cute one on the right. I can understand if you keep the star patterning though

Attention @toysrus__uk The people don't want the creepy one on the left. We want the cute one one the right. I can understand if you keep the star patterning though

If I had to describe my personality in a single picture #Millenial #90sKids

Three dorks off to see #IronLung

@SMB12707 @_AlexHirsch @Artiah669 I love him, Your Honor #StanTheMan

FUCK ICE