Lou

Top 10 tweet all time

Acabas de pedir una pizza. Pones Mewtwo vs Mew en la tele. No hay clases mañana, a tus papás no les importa si te desvelas... Es una noche perfecta tienes 37 años, casi 39, el año es 2026

IT WAS CALLED THE SCHOLASTIC BOOK FAIR AND THEY BROUGHT THE BOOKS TO THE SCHOOL AND SET IT UP LIKE A BOOKSTORE AND YOU COULD GET GOOSEBUMPS AND FEAR STREET BOOKS BUT ALSO MICHAEL JORDAN POSTERS AND NICKELODEON BOOKMARKS AND PENCILS THAT SMELLED LIKE CUPCAKES

‘Do you know how hard you have to abuse a mammal for them not to have children?’ (re humanbeings)

I used to think my dad just had a weird habit. Every night, no matter how late it was, he’d check if I was asleep. Like actually come into my room, stand there for a second, then leave. I remember pretending to sleep sometimes just to see how long he’d stay. Sometimes he’d fix my blanket, sometimes he’d just sigh and walk out. As I got older, I thought it was kinda annoying. Like… why are you still doing that? One night I finally asked him. He just shrugged and said, “Just checking.” Years later, my mom told me the real reason. When I was a baby, I got really sick out of nowhere. Stopped breathing in my sleep. They barely made it to the hospital in time. After that, he never fully trusted “quiet.” So every night, for years… he just needed to see my chest rise at least once before he could relax. 🥹

@BlakqWasntHere Me too lol

@BlakqWasntHere Haven't been to the theater since Godzilla (2014). I will be from and center when this drops.

𝙰 𝚗𝚎𝚠 𝚎𝚛𝚊 𝚘𝚏 𝚎𝚟𝚒𝚕. From the mind of Zach Cregger, director of Weapons and Barbarian. Watch the new teaser trailer for Resident Evil. Filmed for IMAX – in theatres 9.18.

79 hours hours of crocheting 🧶🪡

Before the Internet, we didn’t even know how dumb everyone was. We suspected of course, but now we have proof.

My son just yelled from his bedroom “mom what time was I born??” BOYYYY SHE A WITCH HANG UP THE PHONE NOW!!

i finished my gengar tower!! with absolutely nothing suspicious about it whatsoever :)

@BlakqWasntHere Good. That negro was using her to get more money. He probably was about to get deployed.

@BlakqWasntHere That nigga wanted money. BAH, if I can remember. He was gonna screw her over in the end. I hope she didn't go through with it.

Finally…

@bigchi3fdanny24 @PidgeyPerico I'm stumped, brother.

@PidgeyPerico @Loucem_ any guesses??

Me: Your daughter is severely dehydrated and her sodium levels are dangerously high. What have you been giving her for the diarrhea? Mom: I’m using the "Home ORS" I learned online. Me: Standard ORS is salt, sugar, and water. How are you making yours? Mom: I don't use water; it’s too weak to stop the runny stomach. I mix two spoons of salt into a bottle of Coke and give it to her every 30 minutes. 🥤  Me: Salt and... Coke? Mom: Yes! The Coke gives her energy to fight the stooling, and the salt "binds" the water in her body so it won't come out again. I even added a little ginger to "warm" her stomach. Me: Ma'am, the high sugar in Coke actually draws more water into the intestines, making the diarrhea worse. You are literally pickling your child’s organs with that much salt. Me: 👇

This hoodie wasn’t made with a machine, i spent about 87 hours crocheting it. Please take a moment to appreciate and share it. thank you 🫶

1965: Franca Viola was 17 years old when her ex-fiancé Filippo Melodia, the nephew of a Sicilian mafia boss, broke into her family's home in Alcamo with twelve armed men. They beat her mother. They dragged Franca into a car. For the next eight days, he r@ped her in a farmhouse outside town, telling her she would now have to marry him to save her family's honor. Under Italian law at the time, if she married him, his crime would be erased. It was called matrimonio riparatore - the rehabilitating marriage. Every Sicilian woman before her had accepted. Franca looked at him and said:"I do not love you. I will not marry you." She took him to court instead. Her refusal sent him to prison, eventually abolished the law, and made her the symbol of a generation of Italian women who stopped saying yes.