ℳ𝒶𝓇𝓁𝓎

If you would abandon your child for any reason ever, DO NOT HAVE KIDS.

@samikitts where did you get this pen. i need

*me at work* me: okay if you wouldn’t mind to sign this receipt for me please. *hands patient Shrek pen* *patient looks at pen, then at me, then back at pen* me: 😐

@hanner2014 the hedgehogssss 🥺

@hanner2014 omg he’s the cutest 🥺

You baby boy is why I do it all

@yankee_law_ direct message 🥳

Hey you guys I’m pretty stupid on Twitter,(my kids eye roll here), can someone tell me what a DM is?

This is Billy. Billy came in 5 minutes before we closed, but don’t worry… he left me cash. 😵‍💫 Don’t be like Billy.

You’ll always lose with ill intentions.

my ADHD has forced me to pick up, yet again, another hobby lol

imagine throwing shade and i don’t see it because i don’t give a fuck about you

baby daddy 🖤

i get to marry my best friend today 🤩

It’s so rude to sit at your tables for a hour after you pay out. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

some people will never put their child’s interests/needs before their own, and that makes me so fucking sad

tardigrade… tough as shit 🤩

@EmilyEdmisten @arlycay06 same lol

@arlycay06 I ghosted mine so you’re doing better than me

I just broke up with my therapist and it feels real weird

@Nath_Walters wwwooow did you buy this pattern?! 🥺

another one 💚