Maud Carter

“We should have got on to him early on” Ian Hislop’s takedown of Elon Musk is a thing of beauty 👏

Surreal how? I mean… had it been Dave Grohl, she’d be pregnant by now

@jk_rowling Don’t waste your time @tesshall most Harry Potter fans have not read a single book 🤦🏽‍♀️

I love that you added “all rights reserved”, just in case people try and submit to the Academy Awards without your approval.

@therealmrbenn scroll down to @rickygervais

With so many terrible things going on in the world, it can be hard to find any happiness. It is there. It could be in the spring sunshine, or a bunch of daffodils, or watching a dog chase a stick. Keep your eyes open, you will see something that makes you smile every day.

@MorrisBrightMBE Benny Hill

First television show that comes to mind when you see and hear this....

@ManMadeMoon Tom Jones of course… or perhaps Kenneth Branagh

@ManMadeMoon I doubt you’d say that if you’d tried sausages from happypigclub.co.uk

Lemme see those Spotify wrappeds.

Thanks @pearljam for spending 731 minutes with me in 2022. I couldn’t stop listening to Black. #SpotifyWrapped open.spotify.com/artist/1w5Kfo2…

@ManMadeMoon Both

@ManMadeMoon Mannn those were the days…

@domjoly He playing the long gaime

The thing that really sticks in the craw is the pathetic dishonesty of trying to justify his appearance on the show while Parliament is sitting by claiming that it is to highlight dyslexia- something he has steadfastly not done whatsoever.

Here’s the thing about Matt Hancock. He seems a fairly dull, normal(ish) bloke. But it’s the utter lack of self-awareness that is both a reality TV show producer’s dream and what makes him seem so detached from what everybody but Gary 🇬🇧 in Plymouth thinks… (cont’d)

This tweet is evergreen.

@rickygervais Vegas Baby

Guess where I am.

@domjoly Sure is nothing like a good gilet

Ant’s jacket…🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮

@BrianUkulele @MichaelRosenYes @AidanBruce But some of us are more charming than others

The soonest I can get a flu jab at the GP is Nov 17. Should I go to my local chemist, shell out a few quid and get it done sooner?

@gracepetrie And yet I bet you can go from a C to a G chord without thinking - the struggle is real for the rest of us

It is absolutely wild to me that there are people who know left and right immediately without thinking/checking/waving their hands up and down for 0.1 seconds

@JoJoFromJerz I’m pretty confident that this bus driver will cheer you up

I’m having a rough morning and I could really use a laugh or a smile right now. Dad jokes, puns, useless trivia… anything, please. 🙏🏻

@ManMadeMoon Cornetto?

To my followers: do better