Maximus Textoris Pulcher

Poor Bart, everyone's favorite whipping boy in Brussels over those Russian funds. 😿Prescription from your emperor cat: ridiculous red Santa suit for stress relief. No gifts for the EU grinches. 🎅 #CatTherapy

@Number10cat He is back!

Went for a quick nap and ended up sleeping for 6 weeks. Sorry. Have I missed much?

@FredericDeGucht @DeckxHeidi @cdenv @vincent_v_p Pannenkoek!

@DeckxHeidi @cdenv @vincent_v_p Eéntje voor pannenkoeken dan?

Volgens @cdenv en @vincent_v_p is er geen loonkloof met onze buurlanden… Ik heb andere les wiskunde gekregen en Eurostat zal zich vergissen waarschijnlijk🤯

@thomas_spaas @FredericDeGucht Hmmm... rijstpap!

Wat voor een zielig mannetje is die @FredericDeGucht . Ik wil nooit meer iets van dat omhooggevallen geval horen, eerlijk gezegd.

Pro tip from Maximus: Tricky Axel Miller nomination for the position of chairman of the board at SFPIM? Book a table at Henri in Bergen. One photo op and poof — problem massaged. Still waiting on my tuna though… 💰

Behold true power in action. I’ve trained my human exquisitely well.

In the Netherlands with Bart and Vincent Karremans promoting our cat book. The Dutch loved it. Our book is better than their cheese. Our cat book is a diplomatic triumph. Even the seagulls in Scheveningen are now reading it! 🇳🇱😺

Why is it so quiet today? No one in the office...

Meow from the wheel of power!💪While the ministers argue about the budget, I'm generating 100% renewable energy for Wetstraat 16. 47 km/h already — that's enough to power the coffee machine AND Bart's Latin quotes. Who needs nuclear when you've got Scottish Fold stamina? 🐈

Bart De Wever and his cat Maximus 'testing' the mysterious seeing stone that came bundled with Palantir. Tried asking about next EU summit. Unfortunately someone at the European Parliament was looking too.

"... What exactly do you mean by 'suggestive announcements about a possible story'?" "Bart - can we just hire her already?" 💕

I have equipped a chonk in Crimson Desert and no... I don't think I will ever put it back down

"Hey Maximus, did you order this?"

Breaking: IMEC just turned my chill tree session into a biosafety Level 4 operation, nerds in full hazmat cosplay just declared my tree a 'critical semiconductor habitat' and are relocating it. Relocating ME?! 🛸

Maximus in the Parliament: "Alright, listen up - from this moment forward, we separate the sheep from the goats in this government, as Bart asked nicely, so consider it done. Strength and honor… to the survivors" 🐐

Paul Magnette pulls rabbit… wait no, pulls MAXIMUS out of top hat: "See Belgium? This is how I make things appear from nothing! Next trick: I wave the same wand… and our budget deficit disappears! Plus free energy by breakfast. Who's ready for the grand finale? 🪄🇧🇪

The stakes in the Russia oil negotiations are enormous. One wrong word and the entire European energy security collapses. Also, if we don't reach a deal soon, my 400 kg of highest-grade Iranian catnip will go haywire... oops. I said nothing.😼#IranCatNipDeal #deafspraak

BREAKING: I accepted Iran’s offer of 400 kg of highest grade catnip in exchange for Belgium recognizing Persian Empire 2.0 borders. Bart is screaming, Macron is crying, Bibi is typing in WhatsApp: “THIS IS WORSE THAN MUNICH 1938 AND THE CAT IS THE NEW CHAMBERLAIN!!!” 🇮🇷