Megan Marie

I’m laughing too hard at my poorly done meme

@luxemiaa My dad accused me of lying about my high school boyfriend’s age because he had a full beard. He thought I was trying to pass off a college student as a 17 year old. Also had to show his ID for proof 😂

When my brother was 16, he went to pick up a girl for a date and apparently puberty had already paid him a full salary because he looked about 25 years old. He pulled up to this girl’s house thinking he was about to have a normal teenage date. Instead, her mom took one look at him through the window and refused to open the door. Not even a crack. She kept talking to him through the door asking how old he was, and when he said 16 she clearly did not believe him at all. According to my brother, she looked genuinely concerned for her daughter’s safety. He kept trying to explain that they went to school together and were literally the same age, but she still wasn’t convinced. Finally she told him he needed to prove it before her daughter was going anywhere with him. So my teenage brother had to pull out his driver’s license at the front door like he was getting.......

The year is 2001, you are a American citizen and cannot believe the dumbest man in the world is taking you to war in the Middle East. The year is 2026, you are a US citizen and cannot believe you were wrong; there is in fact a dumber man.

Crockett: "I don't really know where we are in this country. Why are we even having this conversation? The United States is falling apart right now, partially because he's allowing for the killings of people in the middle of the street, but the other part of it is we have a 34 count convicted felon and there are people that are still shielding him from any type of accountability as it relates to a child sex trafficking ring. I don't understand why we are pretending like any of this is normal."

Here’s where I am. If six random people jumped him and executed him because he had a gun, they’d be murderers. The feds do it and I’m supposed to call them heroes? Miss me with that shit. They’re murderers too.

I rescued my 1st FIV+ cat in 2017. I’m now on #3 and #4 after losing the previous 2 to cancer. Jughead (right) was live trapped by my boss for TNR but came home with me after testing positive. Everest (left) I found via a rescue’s FB posts & I couldn’t resist that face!

@NicoleBehnam Met my husband in a similar situation! A friend wanted to set me up with a guy she knew and he realized I had so many common interests with his best friend that he set us up instead. I married the best friend and the original guy was the best man at our wedding 😂

When i was 22 I went on a date and after about an hour and a half I got the sense that we weren’t a match. But the guy reminded me of my friend, so I told him and asked if I could introduce him to her. He said yes, they hit it off instantly, and they got married a few years later. Be generous. Hook your friends up. They may not be right for you, but they’re right for someone else.

More importantly:

The Trump administration just ordered two Gulfstream luxury private jets for Kristi Noem at a cost of over $172 million. This comes as Americans can barely afford groceries.

“why is it 90 degrees in october?” bc you can’t make your grocery list without using chatgpt.

Adulthood hits hard

*eating dinner* Husband: This is delicious! Me: I made a few tweaks to the original recipe. Husband: Write down what you did so you can make it the same way next time. Me: I won't forget. *next time* Me: F*ck.

Best one yet!

President of the United States

Daily Reminder.

Senator Brian Schatz SLAMS Trump and his billionaire friends 🔥

@_FarmerDad A couple years ago I started gifting kids their favorite snacks and it’s been a huge hit with kids and parents! For my own kids we always say no gifts necessary but encourage snacks, art supplies, books, or clothes for people who still want to bring stuff.

Would be great if you all could shift the debate from baby showers to (4 y.o.) kids birthday parties for a few hours? We don't want to tell people what to do. But we don't want to end up with a pile of random plastic toys. And we don't feel like saying "don't bring any gifts" is really fair for a 4 yr old either. Thanks, appreciate it 😆

@medusahead817 @Ewelannawhite Agreed. Married my HS sweetheart when we were 23/24, the other HS couples we knew who got married right away were already divorced by then 😅 definitely helps to wait a few years!

So if @CNBC and this @FrankLuntz joker want to spread the lie that you can magically whip up a holiday meal for 10 people with $58, fine. I'm telling you - with knowledge hard-earned of what it is to be poor and hungry and desperate and ashamed - they are truly full of shit.

Wanted cheaper eggs and got. Rapists. Pedophiles. Sexual assaulters. Putin apologists. Talk show hosts. Enjoy your fucking eggs. #DemsUnited

Trump’s incoming administration isn’t just mostly white and mostly male. It’s also mostly rapist.