Michael

@GuideMeElmo No cute names! You are Elmo, a professional and you must be treated like one. 🤣🤣🤣

@GuideMeElmo File a grievance at once!

@GuideMeElmo Injustice to one dog is injustice to all dogs. Or something.😉

@TroyandEllie1 Beach days are great. Don't get a sunburn.

Just the bestest day ever. We’ve been to the beach and swam and played with the ball. Happy happy

@svershbow Love that faceleh!

We had a nice lazy day

@rcohen Such dreadful emptiness and sorrow. 💔💔💔🖤

Our hearts are shredded with grief. Michael Daniel Lledo was born on April 13, 2022. After fighting — so hard — for 10 days to be a part of this little family, he passed away peacefully in our arms early this morning.

@KellDA An IQ of 4.

@abbythetweet Tastes like...?

@estern839 @RonFilipkowski Yeah.

Woman at Trump rally explains why she believes Princess Diana and Jackie O are still alive.

@RonFilipkowski She's got a mish-mash of Jewish mysticism strangled in Q Anon craziness.

@Tobi_Is_Fab Be more gruntled.

@servicerotties @RitchieYEG @michaeljanz You're a good neighbor, Kuno.

What a great day! I went on a neighborhood walk with our Community League and our city counselor. This was a great way to meet a few new people, get to know our elected representative and hear about some of the issues in our city & community. Now I'm off to a nosework event!

@StruggleDisplay Whew!

Child: Can I help with dinner, mommy? Me: NOOooOoOOO

Tonight’s dinner: stuffed porn chops

@StruggleDisplay Very sad woman! 🤣🤣🤣

[Delicately massaging with olive oil ] “There, that should make them moist enough to be stuffed…”

@transplnt_mdphd 🥺😬❤

Omg WHY are the pop-outs in metal electrical junction boxes SO HARD to actually pop out?! I about to take a drill to this little f*cker.

@DrGRuralMD He'll survive. You will tremble every night. Think of all the funny stories you can tell his fiancee at the rehearsal dinner. Relax, mom! 😚

@servicerotties Grass rolling is great in warm weather!

It's a great day to be a dog here in #Edmonton. ☀️ & up to 15°C is perfect for fetch, hiking, grass rolling and snoozles in sun puddles. Heavy rabbit traffic expected this weekend as they continue to protest the Cobra Chickens arrival. I'm Kuno with the #yeg #Weatherdog Report🐾

I was groomed repeatedly in elementary school, but I never got a better haircut. I blame the education system for all my bad hair days.

@RottieCole I see you, Cole!

I always got my eye on you no matter what!!! #dogsoftwitter

@astroclem The sky-watching thingy? The see the twinkle twinkle lights really well.

Hello, I have a PhD in astrophysics, and following a powerful brain freeze I had to refer to a telescope as a "space zoom device" today.