Julio, Marc's Imaginary Pet Monkey

I'm a social vegan, I don't like meet.

Broke in cash, billionaire in love.

I couldn’t believe how many gnats we had in the house last night until I remembered I have cataracts

Admit it, you've Googled yourself before.

Copper thieves be like I love the wire

If the conversation involves sarcasm and twisted humour, I'm in.

It’s not right that people living in the south are experiencing spring and up here in Ontario I have to get the dog sled out again

Will someone tell me when it's safe* to come out please? * when teens stop sticking their tongues out in pictures

Feeling unwanted changes you.

Don't even talk to me until i've had my divine retribution

Chuck Norris was like…I’m gonna go kick ass in the afterlife, because fuck this.

my glass house and i would just like some privacy. so please, just let us be you fucking pieces of shit

My condition is unconscious but stable. No. The other way round.

I don't give a fuck Chuck Norris died. One less trumper.

The kind of slow healing only listening to the wind as it whispers to me can bring

Keep doing the hard things because when life fcks you again, you’ll be ready

being unhinged to keep things interesting.

A womans sigh can speak a 1000 words

Ding dong.

Let's find little ways to validate each other. Mix it up!

Coffee time...