Mr. Sparkle

DIRT IS MR. SPARKLE'S ENEMY. NORTH KOREA BUILT ON BIG PILE OF DIRT. YOU DO THE MATH.

MR. SPARKLE HELP MAKE JAPAN SQUEAKY CLEAN FOR JOHN KERRY, BECAUSE IT IS NO PLACE FOR LOAFERS.

KIM JONG-UN, JOIN ME OR DIE. CAN YOU DO ANY LESS?

WHY IS DARKNESS DISRESPECTFUL TO SUPER BOWL? I AM FILLED WITH SHAME BUT CANNOT SEE BECAUSE LIGHT HAS BEEN BANISHED FROM STADIUM.

MR. SPARKLE PROMISED SUPER BOWL ADD 16 YEARS AGO, BUT IT WAS BANISHED TO LAND OF WIND AND GHOSTS. WILL THIS BE THE YEAR IT ESCAPES AND AIRS?

SHAME ON YOU, OPRAH! IF U HAD USE MR. SPARKLE, FOODSTUFFS WOULD BE BANISH FROM DISHES & YOU'D GAIN SUPER STRENGTH TO LIFT BIRTHDAY GIFT.

MR. SPARKLE SUCH GOOD BRAND LOGO, HE APPROACHED TO MAKE SEXY ACTION THRILLER BY NETFLIX.

MR. SPARKLE'S POWERFUL SOAP ACTION SO GOOD, HE MAKE LANCE ARMSTRONG LOOK SQUEAKY CLEAN!

WHILE PLEASING THE USAGE OF MR. SPARKLE, IT IS RECOMMENDED NOT TO INGEST THE FOODSTUFFS ON DISHES AFTER BEST WASH.

YOU CAN'T SPELL DISRESPECTFUL WITHOUT D-I-R-T.

YOU NO HAVE MR. SPARKLE AT HOME? GO TO GARBAGE DUMP AND LOOK FOR MY FACE. MAYBE YOU GET LUCKY.

USE MR. SPARKLE BEST WASH TO PLEASE REFRAIN FROM DISHES LOOKING DIRTY.

MR. SPARKLE IS THE SOAP CONTAINS DIRT'S ENEMY, WHICH THE HIGH QUALITY ONLY PRODUCE.

Jodie Foster is filibustering, won't let awards show go on until she gets answers about Benghazi

SHE-BANSHEE JODIE FOSTER DISHONORS ME WITH HER GOLDEN GLOBE ORATIONS. CAN YOU SEE THAT I AM FEELING SHAME?

USE MR. SPARKLE TO BANISH FRAGRANCE OF COFFEE AND BREAD FROM YOUR DISHES TO THE LAND OF WAILING SPIRITS.

HEAVYMANUFACTURINGCONCERN IS NOW HIRING. CAN YOU DO ANY LESS WITH THE EMPLOYMENT YOU HAVE NOW?

MR. SPARKLE IS AVAILABLE IN A PREFECTURE NEAR YOU. ASK LOCAL UNKEMPT MERCHANT FOR LUCKY BEST WASH DETERGENT.

MY POWERFUL SOAP IS UNFIT FOR USE BY THE LIKES OF YOU UNLESS YOU JOIN MY CAUSE.

I AM THE NEMESIS OF ALL THAT IS UNCLEAN. I BANISH FOODSTUFFS FROM YOUR DISHES.