Mrs Matthew Hopkins

@FE_EngineTwo Parfnyppe #parfnyppe

Nothing like a board game to really bring the family together at Christmas time.

STATISTICS OF THE YEAR: Americans killed annually by All Islamic jihadist terrorists 9 Armed toddlers 21 Lightning 31 Lawnmowers 69 Being hit by a bus 264 Falling out of bed 737 Being shot by another American 11,737 rss.org.uk/RSS/Get_involv…

I hath notte yet heard yon Wham's Lafte Chriftemaf. Thank fukke.

Parfnyppe! #parfnyppe Tys as irrev.. illerev.. ivver.. poyntleffe today as twas thenne. twitter.com/MrsMattHopkins…

I doth lyke yon Mafter Pratchett's Death O' Rats - ytte doth fqueak, and it hath an tynye scythe. Also, tys oftimes a bytte of a cunt.

@Slippery_Jack Pah! And yon twatte doth ne'er bryngge me one backe! Nng!

@MiloJames2 Parfnyppe! #parfnyppe

@GlassboyBob @Wytchfinder_Gen Aye. They art moftlye shytte at plumbynge an' all!

@MilosParrots Aye. We do myffe @Wytchfinder_Gen biglye.

@MilosParrots It may hath been a requefte, in whych event it art lykely he hath expired from fruftration. @Wytchfinder_Gen

A vole on a ftryngge art a shytte fubftitute for a yoyo. But it pysseth them ryte off, so there art thatte. #finderwyfetyppes

.@Vole_Facts Voles jufte want to haveth funne.

Paha! Thysse! twitter.com/donaeldunready…

Paha! Thysse art yon outfyde wall o' myne fcullerye! twitter.com/Vole_Facts/sta…

I hath lofte track o' yon shytte that hath been lefte in myne gardenne synce Chryftemass! Fukkesakes! #fynderwyfetwelvedays

@MilosParrots I hath nay idea, fadly. @Wytchfinder_Gen

Lafte nyte I did'ft fynde 5 plaftic curtain rynges on myne doorfteppe. #fynderwyfetwelvedays

Someone hath lefte four crowes in myne gardenne. And the fukkers art squawkynge lyke fukkery! #fynderwyfetwelvedays