Niche Ops™️

@Iamivy05 Ouch

NEURODIVERGENTS WILL BE LIKE “I’M SO TIRED” AND THEN REFUSE TO SLEEP BECAUSE THEY HAVEN’T HAD ENOUGH ME TIME AFTER SURVIVING THE DAY

@Texas_jeep_guy Yes but.. this isn’t nearly deep enough to provide meaningful protection in any capacity

Now that’s a huge hidden bunker. If I win the lottery that’s what I want.

@SQPHIA151 The dream

A massive solar EMP will render all NPC offline.

@Mrcryptoxwhale So… who are we buying stars from? Was the concerned solar system consulted and if so, how was payment forwarded to them?

Cristiano Ronaldo bought a star in the sky worth $37.5 million for his partner Georgina Rodríguez.

@Chesschick01 @Farmer31548981 For how long, I wonder?

Reject modernity, embrace tradition.

True.

@his4Everz A hard no

What is a large group of humans called?

@MarcNixon24 If North Korea can achieve it, why can’t we! 👍

Latest EKOS Poll modelled out 🔴 LIB: 343 seats (+174) 🔵 CON: 0 seats (−144) ⚜️ BQ: 0 seats (−22) 🟠 NDP: 0 seats (−7) 🟢 GRN: 0 seats (−1) Liberal total wipe-out of opposition. Liberal Supermajority achieved. (+/- change from 2025 election)

@ThrillaRilla369 The hospital can expect Chuck’s bill in the mail

BREAKING 🚨 Chuck Norris has been hospitalized in Hawaii This is not a drill Per TMZ

@his4Everz Marriage

@brockpierson 😂

STOP LIKING YOUR OWN TWEETS‼️ STOP LIKING YOUR OWN TWEETS‼️ STOP LIKING YOUR OWN TWEETS‼️ STOP LIKING YOUR OWN TWEETS‼️ STOP LIKING YOUR OWN TWEETS‼️ STOP LIKING YOUR OWN TWEETS‼️ STOP LIKING YOUR OWN TWEETS‼️ STOP LIKING YOUR OWN TWEETS‼️

@TheBuckYouWill Wow

NOT MUCH IMPRESSES ME... ...BUT KARL BUSHBY DOES. THIS MAN IS A FUCKING LEGEND. On November 1, 1998, a 29-year-old British ex-paratrooper named Karl Bushby stood at the southern tip of Chile with $500 in his pocket and an idea that sounded insane. He would walk home to Hull, England! Not fly. Not drive. Not sail. Walk. Every single step. No shortcuts. No exceptions. The distance: 58,000 kilometers across four continents. His estimate: about eight to twelve years. His reality: he’s still walking—and he’s almost home. Bushby set himself two iron rules: Rule One: No motorized transport could advance the route. If he needed to fly for visas, he had to return to the exact spot where he left off. Rule Two: He could not go home until he could walk there. These rules turned what was meant to be a decade-long journey into a 27-year odyssey. The early years took him through South America. Then came the Darién Gap, a dangerous stretch of jungle between Colombia and Panama controlled by traffickers. Bushby spent two months hacking through it, emerging alive, still walking. Through Central America. Mexico. The entire United States. By 2005, he reached Alaska. Ahead lay the Bering Strait. In March 2006, Bushby and French adventurer Dimitri Kieffer navigated 240 kilometers of shifting Arctic ice. For 14 days, they jumped between ice floes, braved polar bear threats, and wore immersion suits. They made it to Russia. But border guards immediately arrested them. After diplomatic intervention, they were allowed to continue, though visa issues persisted. Russian tourist visas only allowed 90 days per 180-day period. Bushby needed years to cross Siberia. After delays, financial crises, and the 2013 Russian ban, Bushby walked 4,800 kilometers to Washington, D.C. to protest. The ban was overturned. He continued through Mongolia, Kazakhstan, Uzbekistan, and Turkmenistan. Then he was blocked from Iran. And then COVID hit. Trapped by the Caspian Sea, Bushby made an extraordinary decision: he would swim across it. The Caspian Sea: 288 kilometers of open water. Bushby, who "wasn't a swimmer," trained for a year. With help from Azerbaijani officials, he swam across in 31 days, reaching Azerbaijan on September 17, 2024. From there, he walked through Georgia and Turkey, covering 2,204 kilometers. On May 2, 2025, he crossed the Bosphorus Bridge into Europe. One last challenge: the English Channel. To maintain his unbroken footsteps, he must cross without motorized transport. His hope is to walk through the Channel Tunnel's service corridor. 27 years. 47,000+ kilometers walked. 25 countries. 4 continents. Roughly 13 years walking; 14 years consumed by visas, bureaucracy, and delays. Why does he do it? "It's a challenge-based endeavor," Bushby says. Not for fame, charity, or records. Because it's hard. Because no one else had done it." Bushby's biggest lesson? "99.99 percent of the people I've met have been the very best in humanity," he says. "The world is a much kinder place than it seems." Somewhere in Europe, right now, a 56-year-old British man is walking west. His footprints stretch 47,000 kilometers back to Chile. Ahead: 1,500 kilometers until home. No planes. No cars. No shortcuts. KARL BUSHBY IS ALMOST DONE. (Almost home!)

@theralkia Linear shits are for newbies

Shits about to get nonlinear

@gothburz Anyone actually read all that?

My net worth peaked at $1.2 million. None of it was real. I don't mean that philosophically. I mean it was located on servers that have since been turned off. I own eleven properties in the metaverse. Three in Decentraland. Four in The Sandbox. Two in Voxels. One in Otherside. And a beachfront villa in Horizon Worlds that I bought for $214,000 because Mark Zuckerberg called it "the next frontier." The frontier closed last week. It's a mobile app now. Last year I mass DM'd 340 people the phrase "you don't understand how early we are." I have since stopped doing that. Not because I was wrong. Because most of them blocked me. I got into metaverse real estate in November 2021. Everyone was buying. Someone paid $450,000 to be Snoop Dogg's neighbor. In a video game. With no legs. The avatars didn't have legs. I thought that was bullish. "The legs are coming," I told my Discord. "Legs are a roadmap item." Three hundred people reacted with rocket emojis. I called myself a "digital land baron." I put it in my Twitter bio. I put it in my LinkedIn headline. I said it on a podcast that had eleven listeners. Three of them were bots. The rest were my alts. My virtual property has more square footage than my actual apartment. My actual apartment has furniture. Location, location, location. My most valuable asset was a plot next to a virtual Gucci store. Gucci left in 2023. The store is still there. Nobody's in it. It's like a mall in Ohio but with worse graphics and no food court. I held. Diamond hands. That's what we said. "Diamond hands." It means refusing to sell while your investment loses 94% of its value. We turned financial paralysis into a personality trait. A guy in my Discord paid $2.4 million for a 618-parcel estate in Decentraland. Prime district. High foot traffic. I asked him what "foot traffic" meant when the platform had 38 daily active users. He said I didn't understand the technology. I didn't. I still bought more. We had a DAO. A decentralized autonomous organization. That means we voted on decisions. There were nine of us. Three never showed up. Two voted on everything without reading it. The other four were me and my alts. We voted to "acquire strategic parcels." The vote passed unanimously. I voted four times. My portfolio peaked at $1.2 million. I told everyone. I made a spreadsheet. I projected 40x returns by 2025. I made a pitch deck. The pitch deck had a slide that said "WE ARE BUILDING THE DIGITAL ECONOMY." The slide had a rocket emoji. That was my entire financial model. In 2023 I bought a Bored Ape for $189,000. It's worth $14,000 now. I don't talk about the Ape. I still use it as my profile picture. People ask me about it. I say "I'm long-term bullish." Long-term bullish means I can't sell it without crying in a Panera. My mom asked me what a Bored Ape was. I said "digital art on the blockchain." She asked why it cost more than her car. I said "you don't understand Web3." She said "I understand you live in a studio apartment." She's not in my Discord. Justin Bieber bought one for $1.3 million. It's worth about $90,000 now. I felt better about mine after I heard that. That's community. WAGMI. We're All Gonna Make It. We said that every day. In the group chat. While the floor dropped. While the volume dried up. While 95% of all NFT collections went to zero. We're all gonna make it. None of us made it. But we said it with conviction and a laser-eye profile picture. That counts for something. It doesn't. But we said it did. That's decentralized consensus. Meta spent $84 billion on the metaverse. I need to say that again. $84 billion. More than the GDP of Luxembourg. More than the GDP of Iceland, Luxembourg, and Malta combined. They spent it on a platform where the avatars had no legs, the graphics looked like a 2006 Wii game, and the peak user count was lower than the lunch rush at a Chipotle in Des Moines. They just pulled Horizon Worlds from VR headsets. It lives on as a mobile app. My beachfront villa is now a mobile app. Location, location, location. Zuckerberg renamed the entire company for this. Facebook became Meta. A $900 billion company changed its legal name because the CEO watched Ready Player One and said "I want that." Reality Labs lost $10 billion in 2021. $14 billion in 2022. $16 billion in 2023. $18 billion in 2024. $19 billion in 2025. That's not a strategy. That's a speedrun. They laid off 1,500 Reality Labs employees this year. Shut down three VR studios. Killed Supernatural. Put the entire VR social vision in a casket and said "we're pivoting to AI and wearables." The pivot took four years and $84 billion. I pivoted too. I'm an AI real estate investor now. I bought a virtual plot in an AI-generated world that doesn't exist yet. The founder said it was "the intersection of spatial computing and large language models." I don't know what that means. I gave him $40,000. He has a whitepaper. It's 47 pages. I read the title and the tokenomics section. The tokenomics section is a pie chart. I love pie charts. They make everything look like a plan. The project has a roadmap. Q1: "Build community." Q2: "Launch beta." Q3: "Scale ecosystem." Q4 is blank. Q4 is always blank. That's where the exit scam goes. My accountant asked me to value my metaverse portfolio for tax purposes. I said $1.2 million. He said "current market value." I said $6,400. He stared at me for eleven seconds. I know because I counted. He asked if I had any other investments. I showed him my NFTs. He stared for longer. I told him they were "cultural artifacts with long-term provenance." He asked if I'd considered a 401k. I told him a 401k was "legacy finance." He told me to leave his office. The metaverse is dead. I don't accept that. I am a digital land baron. I own eleven properties across four platforms. I have a beachfront villa in a mobile app, a plot next to an empty Gucci store, and a cartoon monkey that cost me more than my actual car. Location, location, location. The location is nowhere. But I'm early. I'm always early. That's the same as being wrong except you get to say it with confidence.

@Triumph777CB @SatireSquadHQ 😂 that explains it

@NicheOps @SatireSquadHQ Funds are allocated between a combination of costumes and renaming streets. For the homeless, I'm confident.

$500,000 Per Homeless Person in Toronto. $220,000 in Vancouver. Still Not Enough. Canadian cities confirmed this week that homelessness has officially become one of the country’s fastest-growing industries. Toronto now spends up to $500,000 per person annually, while Vancouver comes in at a more modest $220,000figures experts say depend largely on which denominator is politically convenient. Officials insist the system is working. “It’s created thousands of jobs across multiple departments,” one source noted. “Coordination alone requires entire teams.” Critics say the model has quietly evolved: create a crisis, expand the response, then scale the response faster than the results. Government, they argue, now plays both roles helping manage the problem while steadily growing the infrastructure around it. Residents say they’ve noticed. “There are more programs, more funding, more people involved than ever,” said one taxpayer. “It just doesn’t seem like fewer people need help.” City leaders maintain that solving homelessness remains the priority, though they acknowledge it will require more time, more resources, and likely several new layers of administration. At press time, both cities announced expanded hiring across homelessness-related departments to better address the ongoing shortage of solutions.

@liminal_warmth Bro, 17yo, 8 “friends” in my living room, saw every traitor amongst them & spat in their face (was a lama for a few min), all but two were spat on. All while not moving an inch from my chair. None of them ever knew. Enlightened my circle for decades to come. Highly recommend.

I don’t understand how anyone could hear about salvia trip reports like “I spent 5 years in the bug dimension” or “I was a sentient inanimate hose in my back yard for 20 years” and still be like “well maybe I’ll just try it once…”

@GuntherEagleman Given that the monetary system itself is a fraudulent construct: 100%

How much of it is fraud?

@alphafox Fucktards

What

@ThrillaRilla369 History. Total crock of shit

@elonmusk @SaP011 100%

@SaP011 They should be executed

Her name was Leonie, she was a 13-year-old Austrian girl. While she was out with friends, 3 Afghan immigrants secretly put 11 ecstasy pills in her drink. Stunned and unable to defend herself, she was taken to the house of one of the three. The ecstasy dose was way too high, the girl started overdosing but the 3 immigrants, completely indifferent to her suffering, began to undress her and took turns raping her, putting their hands around her neck, strangling her. All of it recorded by themselves on a mobile phone video. That’s how Leonie died, naked, in atrocious suffering, while the beasts raped her. The autopsy would later confirm the cause of death was triple overdose and asphyxiation. When they were done, they wrapped the body in a carpet and dumped it roadside, under a tree. The girl’s body was found the next morning by some passers-by, wearing only her underwear and with clear strangulation marks on her neck. One of the perpetrators fled to the United Kingdom, but was quickly tracked down in a hotel and extradited, the 3 Afghans were sentenced: - Zubaidullah R. life imprisonment; - Ali H. 19 years in prison; - Ibraulhaq A. 20 years in prison. During the closing arguments, the Public Prosecutor told the court she was “stunned” by what the defendants said throughout the proceedings, stating that “there is not a trace of remorse”.