Nickname

@WHSmith How the fuck do you sleep at night?

I’ve just ruined #gardenersworld for Jackie, by noticing Monty Don, is bereft of eyebrows.

I fought the lawn.

The in-laws are a bit undecided about their bathroom design.

@kazzydoodah Go you!!!!

@leonmoore1006 Spurs and Harleston both losing 5-1. What are the chances???

The way Stoke are playing, and our inability to turn up, this could be 4-5

@Simmo_bo_boots At least we can concentrate on our relegation battle 😩

You know when you think it can't get any worse, i give you spurs

For the love of God! It’s coming out in handfuls. - Clare, balding. #Crufts

@andy_the_chef That Albert chap was useful

#TheChase At least she got her name right.

@leonmoore1006 Good chance of playing your lot next season.

Tottenham are actually going to get relegated

I’m not allowed to look at the woman’s half pipe. I’ve got to watch #masterchefprofessional

@HarlestonTownFC @BranPickess @Gusso6 Well deserved! 👏👏👏

Player of the month for January is @BranPickess for a string of great performances. Presented by ex Town manager @Gusso6

@GaryDelaney God arksed Noah. A three word joke I’m moderately pleased with.

So I said to him if you’re going to build a proper ark you need a way to keep all the animals separate. Noah fence.

@leonmoore1006 @HarlestonTownFC @whitecapps1999 Happy birthday mate!

@HarlestonTownFC Happy birthday @whitecapps1999 Cracking photos 📸

Happy Birthday to our Chairman Adam Mullin. The dedication he shows to the club has put it where it is today.

@HarlestonTownFC What’s the verdict?

Pitch inspection at 10.00am after the rainfall overnight

@SartorialThug Bacon roll. That’s it.

I tried some overnight oats the other day. I lobbed in some banana and raspberries. Tomorrow, I might scoop up some cold dog sick and lob in some banana and raspberries to see if I can tell the difference.

@SartorialThug I’m actually in two minds whether to watch it this time, it’s getting increasingly grating, absolute idiotic people. Of course I’ll bloody watch.

The Apprentice starts tonight. It's a pleasure of mine that I make no apologies for. I think Rajan is going to be one of those annoying try-to-hard bellends and not just because of his matching tie and pocket square. I like the sound of Vanessa's business plan, though.

@HarlestonTownFC Those corners Josh took were superb. Really whipped them in! Great second half, showed great character.

Town grab a goal with Hawkins from a JD corner.

@Ring0SP @GaryDelaney Rescue dogs are dogs that are in a pound somewhere and good kind people rescue them and give them a home. This one was useless when our humble narrator fell down a well. Self explanatory innit.

@GaryDelaney I dont understand this at all.....🫣

@HarlestonTownFC Hope it’s good to go lads! Looking forward to going.

Due to heavy persistent rain over the last 36 hours there will be a pitch inspection at 9.30 at the Rec we will keep you all posted

@HarlestonTownFC @Woodbridgetown Booooo!

Today’s fixture against @Woodbridgetown has been postponed due to a frozen pitch.