Nickels Series

She said she left me because she was worried she'd never know who I was before we met. No backstory - the worst character flaw.

She tells me to relax and be myself. Even with all our shared history, she still has no idea what that means.

I quickly came to realize that anger was pointless. She'll stop deceiving me when I quit answering the phone.

When you have a lot of scar tissue things don't always work the way they're supposed to. I'm going to have trouble doing yoga.

We glorify the past when the future dries up... that's from a song. I'm not smart enough to be as profound as pop culture.

Getting old increases your tolerance for pain and decreases your tolerance for everything else. You become bitter, bigoted, or apathetic.

Fraud is for cowards scared of face to face robbery. I wanna see the look in a man's eyes when he realizes I have nothing left to steal.

I have a past. So do you. And so does anyone who has survived more than a day. That chapter has already been written, and I hate reading.

I let her think the bullet missed me because of luck, fate... God. Really, though, I'm just a slower runner than the shooter pegged me for.

I tried being the good guy once. Didn't much care for it... didn't hate it either.

I was just... me. She hoped for something more. I didn't let her down... her expectations did.

There is no emotion more powerful than regret. (beat) That was a little too heavy for this conversation. Why'd I say that?

The stale sprinkles on this donut are making me pee blood. Also, I was eating it while being punched in the kidney.

@markmatthews That gave me a concussion.

Our co-creator Ian edited this feature and for a limited time it's available to view for free! vimeo.com/108079669?ref=…

I have no strong feelings either way on the nature of apathy because... well... who cares?

It wasn't something I did or said. My sin was being exactly who she thought I was. Plus I banged her sister. But that was before.

I am the sum of my quirks because that's all you require of me.

Stayed up late last night watching McMillan & Wife.