Derek Larsen

I’m 30 and still don’t step on cracks. One day I hope my kids respect that cuz my back be hurting cuh

Don’t mind me just getting stoned in my room

Do nazis get pumped when they order a pizza and the notification says your orders in the oven?

I hate a bitch that says oops

Does anyone ever buckle up in an Uber?

Turns out Derek Larsen’s funny

Midnight sets to become great

Y’all crazy that’s a mansion in Indiana

A grown man flying a kite alone is screaming red flags

Olivia Rodrigo looks like she’s part of the Manson family

You can tell whose doing well in life based off of how often they post on Facebook

Signed up for Kill Tony for the 56th time tonight. We’ll see!

It’s 65 degrees and I’m wearing double hoodies. Texas has changed me

Most important rule of comedy. Burn those bitch ass bridges.

America lost

I hope both teams lose today

These college students just offered me weed because ‘I look like a kid that has never smoked before’… I turn 30 this year

@zerochills This is actually more prevalent than y’all think! The notes app is a problem

Thoughts?

One of the best feelings as a comic/comedy writer is writing for a roast and having your joke get an applause brake. Ya boy is finally getting somewhere in this comedy game

@crazyclipsonly Hmmm looks like the same shield in every Asian porn

Dude shows off the invisibility shield he made