Andrew 🎃

@Caspersight 'Who the fuck are Yooooou??!!'

Lol 🤣🤣

@amnesia91 @fesshole I married a high sex drive. So yes. 16 happy years so far. Choose carefully my friends.

@Parasomnia7225 @fesshole Are you married Andrew? Because that sure as hell doesnt sound like married life to me.

My friends often feel bad I'm single saying it must be hard etc, it ain't, today I'm eating a bowl of custard for tea because I can, meanwhile my friend can't play football tomorrow because he's got to cut the grass and fit some shelves, so who's the idiot?

They took this away from us just because he was allegedly horny for a pretty blonde🥀

@MikeBales Old Greg at Number 3...

New neighbor asks the man across the street. "Anything I should know about the neighborhood?" The man thinks carefully. "Old Greg at number 3 — fixes anything for free. Legend." "The Johnsons at number 6 — lovely family. Annual block party heroes." "Whoever lives at number 8 — don't park in front. Don't mow before 10 AM. Don't exist too loudly. Just wave and keep walking." New neighbor nods. "And you?" The man smiles. "Number 8. Welcome to the street."

@benonwine Yeah. But I wouldn't be crying about it or filming myself. I would be savouring the peace, enjoying my food and reading a book afterwards.

This young man went out for a meal by himself. He said: ‘You don’t know lonely until you have to take yourself for that meal alone because sitting in a room with strangers is better than sitting in your own thoughts in an empty room’ 😔 Would you go to a restaurant by yourself?

@GamewithDave Someone at your door was a social event, not something to be feared.

People who actually experienced the 1990s: What is something you miss from that decade that just isn't the same today

I don't really know what or who Bill Maher is but this quote is pretty good LOL. BILL MAHER "If you don’t believe aliens are here and observing us, maybe you’re the conspiracy theorist."

@Caspersight Yeah, that'll do it. Notice how so much of the terminology has changed over time. Drip by drip they are filling our subconscious bath tub with ideas and phrases that are slowly prepping us for the absolute shit show of a script they are following.

Vice President says this! 😲"I don't think they're aliens. I think they're demons," describing this as a Christian understanding of "celestial beings who fly around who do weird things to people." What do you think?

@MbarkCherguia ...'I told me!'

Tell me? 😏

@fesshole Use the same pen to sign the inevitable divorce papers. Tick tock my friend

When my wife turned 50, she and I and our two kids went on a six-week European holiday - then when I turned 50 a few years later, she gave me a pen. She turns 60 next year and is making noises about another overseas trip, but I think I'll just use my pen to write her a card.

I’ve noticed that people who grew up walking on eggshells around parents who got angry easily or changed moods without warning often become adults who overthink every word, replay conversations in their heads, and assume they’ve done something wrong, even when nothing actually is. If you can relate, this page is for you.

@SirBylHolte I have always just put it down to: he's a bad actor

I had forgotten how much I HATE Tom Holland's Spider-Man. Then I re-watched "Spider-Man: No Way Home" and the reason why hit me like a truck: he's a dumb MODERN LIBERAL. "I’m gonna fix the bad guys." "Ooh, I don’t want the bad guys to get killed." "I don’t care how many people they hurt or kill along the way." "This is what I want, and humanity just has to deal with it." This time when I watched, after 6 years of democrat madness, I literally found myself rooting for "the villains." Because Green Goblin, Doc Ock, and Electro are at least competent and actually get shit done—unlike that bumbling asshole Holland. He literally frees his deadliest nemeses from containment… ….so they can stay alive, go back to their worlds…and kill more people. And the funniest part is that Aunt May cheers him on for FREEING CRIMINALS - and we all know how THAT turned out for her😂 Even Green Goblin calls him out for being too weak to do what needs doing. And now he’s about to ruin “Brand New Day” with his constant failure and weakness. I thank God this will be his last outing in the role. I’d rather have a 60-year-old Tobey Maguire in the suit than this bozo.

@MrBallen @winwithfandiem @MrBallenFnd When are you coming to the UK?

FINALLY...tickets for my new tour are on sale RIGHT NOW...but only for my fans who use the presale code BALLEN! There’s even an EXCLUSIVE Meet and Greet package that gives you access to preferred seating. BUT HURRY… because those are limited! And enter the @winwithfandiem giveaway in support of the @MrBallenFnd for your chance to win a trip to meet ME at one of my live shows! If you’ve been to a live show before, what was your favorite moment?

Please help spread this message ASAP — I was communicating with you on signal last night and you claimed to have seen evidence of the 1996 Varginha incident on the American side then you went dark and my texts are now blocked and or not going through. Please resume communication…I want to learn more. If you feel signal isn’t safe please contact me here: Momentofcontact@proton.me

@Mr_Husky1 Here's an idea: Get another job.

@90sWWE Triple H vs Cactus Jack, Street Fight for the WWF Championship, Royal Rumble 2000, Madison Square Garden, New York City... Absolute time machine destination, no other show has replicated that vibe.

Finish the sentence... I fell in love with wrestling when I saw...

@WWE @CodyRhodes Soon .....

Pointing to the #WrestleMania sign is what @CodyRhodes does 👏 👏

@WWE @CodyRhodes So, are you trying to piss us off, or?