Phil Dawson

After failing to rename the Gulf of Mexico, the Gulf of America. Donald Trump’s deal with Iran includes the renaming of the Strait of Hormuz, the Strait of Donald Trump. #DonaldTrump

The Claudia Winkleman Show is just the Graham Norton Show without Graham Norton. #claudiawinkleman #grahamnorton

Artizan Centre, Dumbarton Approved for a glow-up. Demolished in parts. Then… nothing. The mural fades. The square’s still imaginary. Levelling up? More like levelling off. @jackiebmsp @WDCouncil @LennoxHerald @dumbartonreport #Dumbarton #ArtizanCentre #LevellingUpOrJustLevelled

It’s a hard watch & has been for a good while now, last night’s @itvcorrie slumped to new depths. Do the writers of the show only know how to write about the LGBT+ community these days. Sadly after 50 years, I’ll not be tuning in again.

Has the @POTUS asked for the Golden Key back @elonmusk or is he changing all the locks on the White House instead.

Hi guys are there any sessions where I can just turn up & play @DrumPickleball

Good evening @EE a charge of £4.21 on my account this month for a 3 SECOND PHONE CALL. Absolutely shocking. Been a loyal customer for over 25 years. Any chance you’ll refund this astronomical charge

Took a few photos on behalf of @lancfootlights at the weekend to promote the upcoming production of Blackadder at the wonderful Lancaster Grand in March. Tickets are available here lancastergrand.co.uk/shows/blackadd… thanks to @thurnhamhall for the use of their wonderful building

@SarahLancsUK Every episode had got better and better. Well done to you & everyone involved Sarah

Tonight’s episode is INSANE! You don’t want to miss it!!!!👀👮🏼‍♀️🚨 #HappyValley

Can you beat 13 years on Twitter. Evidently I’ve tweeted 4746 times which works out on average at 1 tweet per day. #MyTwitterAnniversary

@BrexitRonnie @DavidDsmithson1 Lived in Scotland for 20 years having moved from London via Gloucestershire. People used to ask where my accent was from. I would state ‘South of Glasgow’ their reaction would be ‘really’ & I would then say ‘400 miles south of Glasgow’ to which they would laugh

I’m Scottish with a Scottish accent living in Kent. People ask me where I’m from, I say Scotland, they say ‘could guess that, but whereabouts’? I say ‘oh near Stirling’ and a conversation about Scotland or Stirling follows. I don’t feel racially discriminated, I enjoy the chat.

@OwainWynEvans I think you’d be better off responding to those who send you kind words & ignore the idiots. They want a response from you.

The vast majority of letters I get from people are so, so lovely 🥰 But I still find it bizarre that people take time to scrawl stuff like this onto a notepad and send it to me. Hope this camp pic doesn’t put you off any meals dahlings! 😂 (Warning, letter is hateful in nature)

Sunset over Heysham Power Station & @HeyshamGolfClub this evening @VisitMorecambe @MorecambeProm @MorecambeEden @MorecambeBayUK @The_Visitor @MorecambeBID @itvweather @TownMorecambe @LancashirePics @Lanc_pics @kellyforan @kerriegosneyTV @OwainWynEvans

What else would a future bride want to do on a Saturday morning.

@NEAmbulance #bbcambulance why hasn’t John’s neighbour phoned his GP. This isn’t an emergency

Tonight’s the night.. 4 1/2 years after I formed my first club up in Scotland. I’m about to start the venture here in Lancaster

I’m Back… With the backing of @LancasterCityFC I’ve been asked to organise the club’s new walking football club @ditcwfc. Looking forward to starting again. You can find out more about me here. dailyrecord.co.uk/news/local-new… google.com/url?client=int… dailyrecord.co.uk/news/local-new…

Just posted a photo @ Gainsborough Trinity FC instagram.com/p/Chzxn79McQh/…

The Sunny Slopes of Heysham nr Morecambe @VisitMorecambe @Lancashirelife @MorecambeProm @MorecambeEden @MorecambeBayUK @The_Visitor @MorecambeBID @itvweather @BeachMorecambe @TownMorecambe @MorecambeAndArt @LancashirePics @Lanc_pics @kellyforan @JonMitchellITV @kerriegosneyTV

I did say he was the most laid back footballer I’ve ever met.. Here’s @enocklikoy17 sleeping during the @lancastercity.fc team photo shoot @ The Giant Axe (Lancaster City FC) instagram.com/p/ChPTQY-swpH/…