Captain Pissgums @[email protected]

Russia's counting every weapon being deployed by the USA and keeping track of their remaining arsenal. Then Trump will so another very stupid thing, and will realize too late that Putin is actually the enemy and America is relatively defenseless.

@Questergirl @BiatchDulce You've got one. It's the second amendment. Use it or lose it.

@BiatchDulce Amendments take forever, and I doubt that Congress will be willing to vote to give up one of their powers.

America must add an amendment to our Constitution giving citizens the power to remove a President when Congress refuses to do their sworn duty. Don’t you think so?

@Questergirl @AscendTrue Yeah, but Trump uses it for toilet paper.

@AscendTrue It won't happen. We have the Constitution on our side.

🚨 ÚLTIMA HORA: Los liberales están enloquecidos tras los rumores de que se planea construir una enorme estatua de Jesús, el Cristo de la Libertad, en el puerto de Nueva York para honrar la herencia cristiana de Estados Unidos. ¿Cuál es tu reacción?

How the fuck did I wake up this morning and see that I'm following Elon fucking Musk? Did that asshole do this? Fuck him.

@tommysantos14 I wish that were true, but the rest of the world has already moved on from you.

When Trump leaves office: The Department of War will go back to being the Defense Department. The Trump Kennedy Center will go back to being the Kennedy Center. The Gulf of America will once again be the Gulf of Mexico. The unfinished East Wing (it won't be finished by the end of Trump's term) will be rebuilt by the next president, and it will not be a ballroom. Federal agencies packed with unqualified loyalists will fire those people and rehire the career experts Trump fired. The Department of Justice will go back to enforcing the law instead of protecting the president. Scientific agencies like NOAA, the EPA, and the CDC will go back to publishing research without political interference. The U.S. will re-align with its allies and not with its enemies. The presidential pardon power will stop being used as a rewards program for loyalists. Inspectors General will go back to investigating corruption instead of getting fired for it. The White House press room will go back to having briefings, with real journalists and not podcasters. U.S. foreign policy will stop revolving around flattering dictators. And the world will progress as though Donald Trump never existed.

@DipshikhaGhosh Motility issues in sperm is species protection. If the sperm doesn't have all the proteins it needs to move effectively, it's not a good candidate for passing on its genetics.

No cure for endometriosis. No proper management for menopause. No adequate symptomatic relief for menstrual discomfort. But let’s get handicapped sperm a wheelchair to make not so healthy babies because it would make men feel strong.

@Questergirl Jesus fucking Christ.

NOPE. NOT IN A MILLION YEARS. HOLY HELL. And I don't even hate spiders!

@KcNightfire And yet, nobody's impeached, arrested or assassinated him. That's shocking to all of us.

Do people in the rest of the world realize just how much most of us detest him too?

@curvy40s Happy Friday to you, and thanks for sharing this. You've brightened my day!

lust has no boundaries & no taboo eroticism is the fire that fuels pleasure.... Happy Friday beautifuls🥰😈

Does Iran have an elite strike force landing at Palm Beach just after dark tonight to carry out a round of assassinations aimed at effecting regime change? Please?

@Winsome_Wench Denmark has lovely Saab torpedoes.

@Questergirl @MikeBales My lads called swearing "Mama language."

@MikeBales Another reason it's a good thing I didn't have kids, because OMG, that would have been my kids. LOL

I realized I had a road rage problem when my 5-year-old grandson shouted, “Pick a f*ckin’ lane, d*ckhead!” while sitting in my shopping cart at the grocery store. 😖

@deAdder I delivered The Coast throughout the Wallyworld years. I'm so proud to see how far and wide you're pissing people off who need to be pissed off. Keep being awesome.

I was born in Moncton, NB, raised in Riverview, NB, went to university in Sackville, NB. I now live in Halifax, NS. My mother was from Westville , NS and my father is from Kentville, NS. Everybody with the name De Adder has roots in Nova Scotia. My mother was a Joyce. My grandfathers cousin was Ron Joyce of Tim Hortons. No, we got none of the money. My grandmother got Ron to send my mother $600 for hockey equipment for my brother in the 80s. That was all we ever got and we appreciated it. She was divorced and broke with three boys. My brother was a competitive hockey player. I was very fortunate just to attend university. And I'm very fortunate to make a living drawing. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't appreciate how fortunate I am.

@Winsome_Wench @BrewtBlacklist Mum and Dad, that''s two. Brewt and I, that's two who are strongly on the other side. You're frigging gorgeous, and not just on the inside. Not that I've been inside you. But a man can dream...

@KcNightfire @remarks Canada doesn't want Ted Cruz back. You can fucking keep him.

@remarks Really need to stop calling it an immigration crackdown and call it what it is. His effort to make America whiter.

JUST IN: 🇺🇸 President Trump's administration moves to expand efforts to revoke US citizenship from foreign-born Americans as part of immigration crackdown.

Maybe I should give this Melania movie a look, after all... youtube.com/watch?v=jq55Z8…

Every American needs to watch this:

@LePapillonBlu2 I'm reminded of the legend that downloaded St Anger into their recycling bin so they could steal from Metallica and also never listen to it.

NOBODY should watch Melania on Amazon Prime. Not for curiosity. Not for a doom watch. That shit needs to fail HARD. #BoycottingMelania

@Questergirl @TerribleMaps Yes, well, ask the good people of Sakatchewan first. They're a justifiably particular bunch.

@TerribleMaps Works for me.

A proposal for the partition of North America by u/finanon99

@Questergirl @KeruboSk So pathetic.

@Pissgums @KeruboSk Right?

Anonymous confession: I'm a married man in my mid-30s, and if I'm being honest, my ego is bruised. Before we got married, my wife already had a thriving business. I admired her drive - that's what drew me to her. But marriage has changed how it feels. She earns far more than I do, and it's messing with my head. I suggested she put the business in my name so I could lead it as the husband while she supports. She shut it down immediately, saying she can't hand over what she's spent years building. Now I feel disrespected, and I'm starting to question whether she truly values me or this marriage.