Prince

Coworker I had relations with told me I have no shot with a different coworker. Challenge accepted. Already accepted the insta follow. Runs marathons so Prince needs to hit the pavement. The next two months are mine, believe that. FYI: Never bang your coworker. #fuck

@joemauersdad Maybe so. But at least I didn’t lose my debit card, identity, credit card, health insurance, dental insurance, CPI certified card, grand casino rewards, 10 dollars to subway, 3 random business cards, social security, and 8 crumpled one dollar bills all at the same exact time.

@Princehasdied Not the best guy to call you on this, but you have lost your card more than anyone I know.

Wallets are easily top 5 gayest thing you could own. Let me put a fucking book in my pocket with 15 cards I don’t use and then struggle to take the 1 card I actually need out of there. Absolute dogshit. You’re a sheep if you use one, go look in the mirror. Got me pissed off.

I may have been wrong…

@AtlantaFalcons If your offense coordinator has his entire salary on the under please let us know in advance next time 🙏

At the half

@SNYGiants I think Jameis Winston is one of the greatest humans ever

Jameis Winston was asked what his favorite Thanksgiving dish is: "My wife, man, she makes some kale collard greens. Her family’s from New Orleans so she makes a nice Creole dressing. It’s unbelievable. One of her cousins, her auntie, she always ships us some gumbo for us to start off the day with some gumbo. So, man, it’s a beautiful thing. Taysom Hill put me on this turkey. I’m typically a ham person, but Taysom Hill put me on this Uncle Ray’s turkey. They ship this turkey right to your door, you pop that thing in the oven and I’m talking about, it is succulent. That thing is juicy, it’s spicy, oh my gosh, it’s amazing."

@AlexCaruso About once a month I convince myself that you know what you’re talking about and about once a month I realize you have no idea what you’re talking about.

Super Underrated Bet Today. Brock Purdy Under 0.5 Interceptions 50❤️ and I’ll drop NFL Play #5 49ers are 7 point favorites and likely to win and Brock has not thrown an INT in 17/21 wins and didn’t throw an INT last week And 6/8 QBs are under vs the Panthers who are weaker vs the run so I expect a heavy run game from the 49ers today Especially as Purdy has INTs in a lot of his losses when he’s chasing points to get back in the game but he’s been exceptional with any form of lead So it’s a perfect time to fade the Panthers coming off their best game I expect the 49ers to roll them and Purdy to not be throwing dangerous if up big early Best Line: -120 Fanduel

@TCU_Cash @joemauersdad

I dare someone to show me a bet slip with Brevyn Spann-Ford scoring a TD

@FatPatCelly Yes

@Princehasdied How high are you prince?

It’s called basketball because you shoot a ball into a basket. I thought it was just a random name like hockey or soccer. I just found this out at the age of 23. Never occurred to me.

Did not expect shefty to be tatted like this

If anyone wants to shoot me in like the shoulder or hand PLEASE do it.

I remember the day like it was yesterday. Wasn’t no barking from KG when he saw me running up the floor with the rock. The song Purple Rain was actually inspired by that day because it was raining goddamn threes in that gym. Fuck em. Believe that.

Work sucks, can’t hit a bet to save my life, no girlfriend in the big 25. But…. WOLVES ARE FUCKING BACK BABY and that’s all that matters.

KOC finally realized he had the ginger version of Bin Laden at QB so he let him get absolutely fucked on for 4 quarters. This is GREAT news. Get ready to learn Canadian buddy.

All I can say is is wow

Clocked in a ten hour shift at the bar last night. 4pm Happy hour to closing down the state bird. Feeling the consequences but glad to know I still got it

@JustinRost420 @uncledoomer This has to be number 1 on Trump’s agenda!

@uncledoomer @Princehasdied

i still cant believe this happened. ive seen it a thousand times and its still one of the funniest things ive ever seen in my life

I don’t respect one thing about fancy restaurants

The legalization of marijuana, bad.