Punderstruck

Mozart: [pulling out harpsichord] anyway here's wonder waltz

@KitchenAid_CA Why would the paint come off your products so easily? Is it food safe? I bought the hook on the left less than a month ago and it's beginning to chip. This isn't even daily use. What is your suggested solution? Even the metal portion leaves black marks on cloths.

@AleaKootz "Aside from dismissing your existence we'll be welcoming." 🙄

December 18, 2022. 34 year old Leo Messi will win the World Cup and become the greatest player of all times. Check back with me in 7 years.

@lavern_spicer Uh. Uh. You might want to read the Bible. Or, say, the Lord's Prayer? You know, the things that refer to Jesus by pronouns all the time?

Do not ever refer to my Lord Jesus Christ with pronouns.

I'm going to break with tradition and start a false crime podcast. I will call it Slander.

So the fanboys for Elon. What do we call them? Muskovites?

@robreiner I wish I were still so optimistic that it isn't already meaningless.

I was always a Golgi body kind of kid

@TorontoBlonde 0 x 1.7 = ... fuck

Odd that Americans draw the line at shouting "fire" in a crowded venue, not firing into one.

Elon Musk can afford to lose $44B. We cannot afford to lose daily access to tomfoolery we will be depressed brother

@thwphipps Well, the plums start comin' and they won't stop comin'. Gotta hit the icebox for some more cold plummin' Didn't make sense to eat lukewarm plums You got the icebox, so go chill them, son

People born in 1983 will be 60 next year. Let that sink in.

I seem to remember there were other ways to share news and information other than Twitter. If it’s a swamp, maybe we just all walk somewhere else.

@bessbell No

Is this real??

Yo @elonmusk there might be more to this story than meets the eye

Trans rights are human rights

A picture is worth a thousand words, especially if it's a picture of a thousand words