Colonel Catty

@FinalCutTile We have a local place too, she knows me by my order, regardless of how much time passed

I have been going to this Thai food place for 12 years now. It is good, but thats not why I go there. The reason I go there religiously is because the little Thai lady owner. She is an absolute treat, always happy, always smiling, always wants to know how my jobs are going and wants to see pictures. She gives me a Christmas card every year with 1 free meal, she has ordered special peppers to make my extra hot fried rice even hotter 😂 Just being around her for the 3 mins I'm in there each week is like a reset, it changes my entire day because her happiness is so contagious. Even tho I tip well, I still get the better end of the bargain, because I really cant put a price on how much her aura heals my soul when I am in need of it. 🫶

@jonstewart Not as good as you! Stop being so humble.

@diana_dukic @EPavlic @elonmusk

@EPavlic @elonmusk Honest criticism fixes things; licking boots doesn't.

Went from scrolling 24/7 to not even wanting to log in. X just hasn’t been hitting the same lately.

@YatYas1070 @Jony_Invests @escapefrommelos

It’s non toxic. It’s porous so it allows rain to slowly soak into the earth instead of running off and eroding the soil. It helps the gravel to stay in place during extreme weather events. But jackasses like you would rather live in a grass hut in the middle of a mud flat. Cool. You do you Boo. Stay the hell away from everyone thats not retarded like you.

it's staggering to me that this kind of callous, shallow recklessness is legal

@kylenabecker @ScottPresler @MrJulieGoldman They can not stand anyone that thinks freely

@ScottPresler @MrJulieGoldman We support FREEDOM, Julie. STFU

Hey. If you want a self hating homosexual Trump loving pandering, coward, paid influencer, as your state committee rep vote for this tool! He will be sure to represent his bosses and make sure to lie, bait and fuck you over ! #maga #tool @ScottPresler

@BTCBreadMan @GetSurplusApp Roommates that occasionally sleep together. We know a couple that's like this.

@GetSurplusApp If you’re transferring money back and forth because you “owe each other”, you’re romantic roommates. Not a serious married couple.

My best friend is 36 years old. He’s been married for 7 years, but they still don’t have a joint bank account. He and his wife literally Venmo each other for half a meal out, or half of the gas bill. How do I kindly explain to him that they are acting like unserious children?

@monkieboy99 Our janitorial company started using it, instead of the proper cleaner. We terminated our business.

Can ICE deport this awful smelling cleaner? Make Pine-sol great again

@gunsnroses2016 @WotCoasts QUEER people exist to make their preferences eveyones problem, gay and lesbians do not

@WotCoasts You should be able to express yourself however you want. Queer people don’t exist to impress you

@Geniustechw The reason many waffle houses are going to carryout only

What is this? 😳

@JBmalloyd @onemalaikaa Simmer down June bug

@onemalaikaa Let’s go

Man in the hood threatens to end a gay dudes life and gets beat

@DaFergies13 @Grampy_Calls_BS @wakeupusa Stop condoning the gangster lifestyle

@Grampy_Calls_BS @wakeupusa Why not? I’d love to know why you think this hairstyle is inappropriate. Do tell.

WATCH: Father cuts his son’s dreads off because he bullied a kid with cancer. Is this the correct punishment?

@anymanfitness Blood work and Colonguard tells you what you need to know

Men, if you're over 40, it's time to get a colonoscopy - don't wait til 50. Tons of horror stories out there, better safe than sorry. The prep isn't too bad, but be sure to drink plenty of electrolytes or you will be dehydrated. I passed out while taking a leak, don't be me.

@prax1s_mm @anymanfitness The calender part and something to talk about is 100% true

@anymanfitness It's not for you. It's for her. She wants to be invited to a party/meal/whatever so she has something on her calendar or something to talk about with her friends. It's not malicious. But it also has nothing to do with celebrating you in any way.

Every year my mother in law asks me when we are going to “celebrate” my birthday and every year I tell her I don’t want to. 45 year old men shouldn’t even acknowledge the day, they should just go about their business.

@Gracie5111 @its_The_Dr @CRIXUSwasHERE It's all they know

@its_The_Dr @CRIXUSwasHERE Why live your life in a state of fury and hate? Do you think we were happy with Biden? NOOOOOOOO. what did we do? Went to work, happily lived our lives. You should do the same.

What would you say to her?

@TaraBull Look at that convenient tap pay

Card skimmer found while pumping gas. How would the average person even spot one?

@OutGrowGreed @Mr_Husky1

@Mr_Husky1 If we didn’t know why, we weren’t paying attention. A large number of scientists, epidemiologists and infectious disease specialists had been screaming at the top of their lungs for weeks about the forming pandemic. Kind like the climate scientists have been for years now…

6 years ago today, we were told to take our laptops home for no reason. Friday March 13th, at 11:30am, we received an email telling us why.

@Leigha_Sapienti That poor dog 🐕

Controversial social media influencer Lilly Contino faced restaurant drama today while streaming. The people she sat next to didn't want to be filmed. The server asked her to change her camera angle. Lilly changes the camera to an angle where shes filming people on the other side of the table, to putting it back to the original camera angle, to then putting an emoji sticker on a few faces at the table. Lilly calls them Karens after putting an emoji sticker on them, and states the will eventually go to the manager and complain (they never did) Lilly has made no changes in her content despite stating that she would. Lilly then leaves after playing the victim card, and stating that the whole table is mean to her. When she leaves, she goes to film the entire table.

@HELLSBELLS828 Mustard and onion 🧅

I had a liverwurst sandwich for lunch. Am I the only American left who likes liverwurst

@JacintaAllanMP The buyer has and always will pay for due diligence

If you're selling a home, you should have to provide a building inspection report - instead of every interested buyer paying for their own. We're changing the rules to require exactly that.

@js_ace_football @Casey Boss is ok, given the relationship warrants it. Small dicked fools that feel threatened use “chief or buddy”.

@Casey I’ll take buddy over Chief or boss any day

there are only two circumstances wherein a grown man should call another grown man 'buddy'; 1. if you want to fight 2. if you want to condescend, before you fight