Randomguy

In honor of Charlie Kirk, I’m going to document my path of learning about Jesus and Christianity. I am an ex-atheist. I struggle with same-sex attraction. I just started reading the Bible months ago, I prayed for the first time last weekend, and I’ve never really been to church.

@Rogerr0718 You’re not!

I just don't want to be a pathetic victim and a burden anymore. Don't be alarmed by this. Just venting. Ignore it.

Life changes so fast. I married this amazing woman in April, now we find out we will have a baby around mid-January 2027. My mind has been racing a bit. God is putting a huge responsibility on me and it's daunting.

@sanderson1611 My wife loves this song!

"Moonlight Sonata" (First Movement) by Ludwig van Beethoven

I don't even know how I would've managed my many deeply negative and dark emotions lately if it wasn't for the people I've met on here. Every time I open this app now it feels like I'm regaining myself. I really aspire to be as good of a person as the people sending me support.

@BereskyEric @Rogerr0718 Leave my friend alone, he’s sad that someone is sick and suffering, that’s called being a decent human being. What’s wrong with you.

@Rogerr0718 I really hope ypu are sterile for all of our sake

I just saw my neighbor get brought out on a stretcher. I don't think I'm gonna be getting any sleep now. I'm so worried. It's so hard to handle the stress of so many horrible things at once.

@Rogerr0718 @StowawayPenguin You are not a burden!

@StowawayPenguin I really don't wanna be a burden on anyone though which is why I don't feel comfortable reaching out to anyone about it personally. Both of my friends stopped talking to me because of me being a burden on them. I don't want to do the same thing to people on here.

@Rogerr0718 You can talk to me!

I just found out today that something very serious is going on with one of my only family members. I can't stop crying. The friends I would've gone to to vent about heavy things like this are gone because they think I started going crazy. I miss them so much and wish I could prove them wrong. I just don't want anyone else to die or abandon me. The only good thing in my life seems to be the friends I'm making here. I'm so grateful for what I do have.

@Ngamini2004 @ostrachan Yeah that attraction is evil! But I think a Christian can feel that attraction and resist it with God's help! Like a Christian can be tempted to gamble or do drugs or cheat on his wife, but resist it. The Bible says "resist the Devil and he will flee from you". James 4:7

Well first I think it would be helpful to define same sex attraction. Same sex attraction is having a sexual attraction to the same sex. That may seem elementary but it’s not. But the attraction isn’t the same thing as lust. Lust involves actively desiring something. Same sex attraction is someone seeing a guy and feeling aroused sexually by them. Same sex desire is when that temptation turns into a desire to be with them. That’s lust. Being attracted to the same sex is a temptation. Desiring to have sex with the same sex (or the opposite sex if you aren’t married) is lust. The temptation should be resisted otherwise it will lead to lust. But they are not the same thing. The key is desire. Same sex attraction isn’t same sex desire. It isn’t wanting to have sex with a guy. It can lead to that. But there can be someone who is same sex attracted but doesn’t want to have sex with a guy for moral reasons. Let me give an illustration: Let’s say a guy comes out of a gay lifestyle and is saved. And let’s say that he’s out walking on the beach and he sees a man he finds attractive. So he sees this guy and feels aroused by him. That attraction is a temptation he’s facing. But He’s not sinning at this point. This temptation came to him and seeks a resting place in his heart. At that point, he has a choice to make. He can either feed that attraction or deny it. The Side B movement would tell him to not fight this attraction. To feed it. Coddle it. Make it his identity. And do that for the rest of his life. If he does that, then it will lead to him to move into desire. Where he actively wants to have sex with this person. At that point he is sinning, because he’s taking that temptation and feeding it. And given enough time, that lust will lead to him acting on it. Either through pornography, or physically. And wreck him spiritually. So that’s his first choice. Coddle it. The second choice is for him to say no to the temptation of the attraction and resist it. That’s what Scripture counsels him to do for all lust. And over time as he does that, it will become easier to do so. Maybe that temptation will go away with time. I know people for whom it has. But if it doesn’t, and he’s 90 years old and still is attracted to men, that isn’t a failure on God’s part. God doesn’t promise that the flesh will be eradicated in this life. But the more you exercise the muscle of saying no to temptation, the easier it usually gets. But regardless, this man is still responsible to resist that temptation. So what is same sex attraction? It’s a temptation. It’s one of the many different temptations that affect us in this fallen world. Different people deal with different temptations. But with all that being said, I still wouldn’t call same sex attraction morally neutral. Because while it is not sinful, it is an attraction that is geared towards something that is sinful. Let me give an example. Let’s say there’s a 25 year old married dude. He’s out on the beach and he sees a lady and he feels sexual attraction to her. That feeling isn’t a sin. It’s a temptation. But it’s not morally neutral. Because he’s attracted to doing something that is sinful. Having sex with someone other than his wife. So it’s not morally neutral. And If it leads to him desiring her and undressing her in his mind, that it becomes a sin. Jesus said if you look at a woman to lust after her, you’ve committed adultery with her in your heart. (Matthew 5:27). Lust is a serious sin. But it’s not the same thing as sexual arousal. So same sex attraction isn’t a sin. But it’s still a temptation and it should be resisted in the power of the Holy Spirit. Just like I’d tell a married heterosexual man that he should resist feeling sexually attracted to anyone that isn’t his wife. I could say more on this but those are my basic thoughts on the question of same sex attraction.

Even as we grieve, we must be clear. The experience of homosexual desire is sinful. This is not unloving to say. This is loving to say. There is nothing about homosexuality that is righteous. There is no such thing as a "gay Christian." Love requires us to teach the truth.

@musicalboi76 Doing great! Trying to limit my screen time! Did you call me Ryan or is that autocorrect for my handle? Anyway I never said my real name on X (except in private chats) so you're free to invent one.

@RandomBi7 Very nice. Hey ryan hope your doing ok. Havent seen u online in a while 🙋‍♂️

Jesus saved one of my closest friends last week. I'm so happy I feel like this gif.

@sola_chad I think this is something I did before. I used people.

Wes Huff when asked about the Bible and sexuality: “We used to use things and love people, but now we use people and love things.”

@Rogerr0718 I remember when you posted how much you hated yourself and I thought, "I think I know how this guy feels, I have to say something." The same God who made me also made you.🙂

Since I started venting on here around a month ago, I've only done it because I lost my closest friends who I felt comfortable talking to, and I couldn't handle bottling up my pain and just trying to "suck it up" anymore. I really just expected that it would go unseen or not be taken seriously. What I didn't expect is for a bunch of strangers to not just notice and take me seriously, but flood me with support, advice, and compliments which I am NOT deserving of in the slightest. There's no way that I can fully express my gratitude towards anyone who's sent any sort of positivity my way lately, but it's all left a mark on me. You're better people than I can ever hope to be. I'm very grateful. God bless anyone who reads this!

@Rogerr0718 I will pray for you too!

I pray that I feel like the real me again, one day. 🙏

@FDMurphy1635 Great now I’ll be scared of the cat. I shouldn’t be scared of a cat at 6’5 with a brown belt in BJJ…

@RandomBi7 I have a friend whose relatives, two kids, caught Cat Scratch Fever from kittens. One kid had a huge seizure and they couldn’t figure it out until a smart pediatrician diagnosed them.

My aunt asked how I’m adapting to married life. Honestly the only thing difficult to adapt to is the cat, which came along with the wife. He has super sharp claws. He attacks inanimate objects. He rubs himself on my feet at random times. Why did God create cats?

@Rogerr0718 Dude that's a decent take.

I wish that these right-wingers who are posting about surrogacy would put this level of energy into talking about how we can help children who have experienced real abuse and trauma, and how we can prevent it from happening to others so they don’t have to live with it for their entire lives and be forced to cope with it on their own. I think that sounds a lot more important than gay surrogacy.

@Rogerr0718 No! I know that foe! Let’s defeat it! I will pray for you, and you can talk to me!

My wife is so organized. My little house has never been in such perfect order before. The place feels different. More like… a real home.

@Hartlander_ Sure sounds like it

@RandomBi7 UCC is an apostate organization.

I don’t think she’s a Christian.