Mau Rob

@Amer1can_Barbie 🫣😮‍💨

Gonna spend the rest of the day lying in bed reading all of the detailed accounts of how or baddest motherfuckers absolutely owned the shit out of everyone and brought our hero home… MURICA!!!!! FUCK YEAH!!!! 🇺🇸🥵🇺🇸🥵🇺🇸

@wiseconnector 90, no tattoos, ever.

80 for me. What about you?

@darren_stallcup Only the parts without liberals.

Oregon is awesome 🇺🇸🌲

@TalkWithSally Ahh what a bummer, I was hoping to live vicariously through a picture of said brisket.

Forgot to take a picture of the brisket. Oops.

@TalkWithSally Oh sigh 😮‍💨, would totally love to.

@Robthewolf1878 Hurry up.

It’s a great day to smoke a brisket.

@wiseconnector 17

I was 20. You?

@WorkElizab Ah yes I’ve seen one or two around my house, usually good for coin storage.

No way you know what this is… unless you've got a few decades under your belt!

@wiseconnector Yes they are.

What do you think? Are they?

@GavinNewsom @KenBurns When is your Trump baby due?

Americans are finally seeing Trump for what he is — someone using the office to get rich. The tide is turning. New episode with @KenBurns out now.

@IfindRetards That’s a tie.

Who is more retarded?

@wiseconnector Perfect 👌🏼

Is this perfect or undercooked?

@elonmusk I’ll take a few of those.

Inspiring new merch idea: rocket pocket underpants! 🚀 🩳 Underpants with a handy pocket for your rocket, which contains a real scale model rocket with an easy pull out ability. Guaranteed to be a hit at parties!

@darren_stallcup There’s a house in SF that I have seen with doors and windows secured like in The Purge movie, Zombie Apocalypse ready vehicles outside and Patriotic stuff out front, 2nd Amendment and everything else, warning signs etc, it’s fantastic.

BREAKING USA: AMERICAN FLAG FOUND IN SAN FRANCISCO 🇺🇸🚨📍

I’m on the road for work - so I’ve decided to start drinking now so that I’m warmly buzzed in time for the speech…which I will be live tweeting about from the comfort of my swanky hotel bed… Gird your loins…I will be holding absolutely nothing back 😂

@ksorbs Sounds like Kamala.

What is going on with Gavin Newsom?

@SteveHiltonx Haha good one!

🚨 Just spoke to Gavin Newsom. He agreed it's an insult to the intelligence of every California voter for Democrats to ask for four more years of one-party rule after the catastrophic failures of their last 16. Said he will urge Swallwell, Steyer etc to drop out. Thank you for your close attention to this matter.

@GuntherEagleman They’re not allies, they’re freeloaders

THERE ARE TWO MESSAGES FOR THE WORLD: Iran has been ESSENTIALLY DECIMATED and the allies America once had has revealed themselves to be DISLOYAL. We walked in, ROCKED Iran's world, politely asked for help, and MULTIPLE countries denied our request: DISGUSTING. When it comes to ground troops, WHY IN THE WORLD would our War Dept. or President provide CRUCIAL strategic plans to the media who would use it to HURT our chances of victory.

@gpatterson828 It’s the biometric scanner.

@PubWanghaf @CallMeK1123

Marco Rubio finding out he has to be Kristi Noem’s husband