Brett Anders

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Brett Anders

Brett Anders

@RubberBAnders

Perspiring comedy writer.

Portland, Oregon Katılım Ağustos 2016
3.9K Takip Edilen1.4K Takipçiler
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Brett Anders
Brett Anders@RubberBAnders·
Ruthless gang seeking new members named Ruth.
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Doug Ankerman
Doug Ankerman@myoddsock·
Today is World Redhead Day. Unfortunately it’s also sunny which means all gingers celebrate indoors to avoid getting burnt.
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Doug Ankerman
Doug Ankerman@myoddsock·
I wanna know how they got them in the bag?…
Doug Ankerman tweet media
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Brett Anders
Brett Anders@RubberBAnders·
I'm an only-child of an only-child. (Doesn't that mean I'm a Warlock or something?)
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Doug Ankerman
Doug Ankerman@myoddsock·
HOW OLD AM I? Old enough to be asked if I want my eyebrows trimmed during a cut at Great Clips.
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Brett Anders
Brett Anders@RubberBAnders·
After his talk with the Chinese president, I can't believe that Trump hasn't used the excuse "That's what Xi said!"
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Brett Anders
Brett Anders@RubberBAnders·
All Little Caesars pizzas should have seven slices on the Ides of March.
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Doug Ankerman
Doug Ankerman@myoddsock·
Breaking: Aaron Rodgers resigns w/ the Steelers and Ned still taking Otezla.
Doug Ankerman tweet media
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Brett Anders
Brett Anders@RubberBAnders·
The best way to stop the Zombie Apocalypse is by wearing a MAGA hat. They'll pass you by because they will see that you're brainless.
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Brett Anders
Brett Anders@RubberBAnders·
Being bipolar, my attention span is shorter than Fred Mertz's zipper.
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Brett Anders retweetledi
Adam Gabel
Adam Gabel@TheAdamGabel·
I read that the influx of FIFA fans to NY is likely to create a shortage of places for folks to relieve themselves, so when they say the World Cup is full they mean the actual Cup is full.
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Doug Ankerman
Doug Ankerman@myoddsock·
Happy 79th birthday to rock legend Iggy Pop. (L) Touring with his band (R) Touring with Body Worlds exhibition
Doug Ankerman tweet media
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Doug Ankerman
Doug Ankerman@myoddsock·
A truck with low self esteem…
Doug Ankerman tweet media
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Doug Ankerman
Doug Ankerman@myoddsock·
Air traffic controller shortage blamed for near-miss runway incident between two fashion models.
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Brett Anders
Brett Anders@RubberBAnders·
Can I still go to the acupuncturist if I'm feeling Pins and Needles?
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Doug Ankerman
Doug Ankerman@myoddsock·
Just saw a guy on his morning stroll. Cig in one hand & a Mountain Dew in the other. (aka Hillbilly Power Walk)
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Doug Ankerman
Doug Ankerman@myoddsock·
Who knew so many suffered from ED they’d have a waiting room!
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