Sarah Lane

Fave moment of #theundateables ever

@IPhillips79 I can’t remember anything other than one of the characters putting someone’s (Delilah?) yoghurt down the sink….. I think about it way too often

This Life - BBC 1996-97 Running for two series, I loved this comedy-drama series which spanned 33 episodes. Who watched and enjoyed?

One of my all-time favorite type of videos is pre-fame bands playing their extremely famous songs to a tiny room of people, because they're not yet known. A thread of some examples: Bastille playing Pompeii in what looks like someone's living room:

@fesshole Genuine question- do you go down on her regularly? I have given my husband a million bjs and he’s only gone down on me once, when I begged, which understandably ruined the vibe. Can you DM me and let me know?

The only time my wife goes down on me is Father's Day, and while I appreciate the gesture something feels a bit off.

@ChristnNitemare Love how’s she slurring her words. Imagine waking up thinking “oh no, wjat did I do when I was hammered on booze” and then find this uploaded video of yourself. The embarrassment 😂😂😂😂

It’s as simple as that…

@fesshole You know you could do it for longer and have better rather than poorer oral hygiene

My little daily act of rebellion: I stop brushing my teeth before my electric toothbrush gives the two minute alarm. Not having no toothbrush telling me what to do.

@Charlimortis @ChristnNitemare I know…. That made me cringe too

@ChristnNitemare "That One Little Girl"???

Alleged rapist Russell Brand and proud Christian nationalist Sean Feucht baptized people together in Florida yesterday…

@ChristnNitemare Is it me or does she have a very masculine energy… Is she wanting to man up?

That’ll teach ‘em!

@TomHaflinger @ChristnNitemare You actually made me lol 🙌

Case closed…

@DevAndyZ @ChristnNitemare Thank you! I was thinking exactly that

@ChristnNitemare Who tf rinses off oranges before peeling them??

@ChristnNitemare Based on this, then I can only assume God didn't really want us eating coconuts...

@fesshole So um, where is this? Asking for a friend

Needed a wax, chose to try new local place. Woman offers me a happy ending. I say no, I have a husband, she says "now I don't get paid". So I tip her well, spend money to not get hand relief, and now I feel sordid like I've cheated on my husband even though nothing happened.

Ten years ago, my son used Thomas the Tank stickers and put them on people's garden gates. On the local Facebook group, people were saying it was dog thieves marking houses. I never owned up, but I got a load of abuse when I said the leader of the gang was the Fat Controller.

Boss of a small regional office decided that he liked the idea of everyone staying an extra 10 mins after their shifts to fill in an online form listing five things they did that day. He changed his mind very quickly after just one email from Unite the Union. Join a union.

@fesshole I love this on so many levels

I was an extra in a play. One of the cast was annoying me so I hid all his belongings on the ceiling with some double sided tape I found in the dressing room. Turns out it was 'toupee tape'. One of the bald actors couldn't go on because his wig wouldn't stay in place.

@fesshole Tell her - it’s so easy to communicate if you try

Wife thinks I'm cheating on her, I'm not, I'm just two years into writing an embarrassing smut novel and I can't let her know about it.

I once rigged the results of a charity dog show because I'd had a one night stand with the owner of one of the dogs and she was going to tell my girlfriend.

@pluralHaven @fesshole Thank you- I am relieved I didn’t Google it 😂

CEO of my company is a massive arsehole. So I have personally seen to it that the filename of his photo on the company website is named "hello.jpg". If you know, you know

Just watched #adolescence on Netflix- absolutely loved it, was initially surprised by there being only four episodes but in retrospect it makes sense to end where they have

A Bible-thumper with 90k followers says that Earth is flat and planets aren't real. This is your brain on religious indoctrination.