Andy

Accountability Thread Always looking for help/support/suggestions/tips #edtwt #edrtwt HW - 292 lbs (2016) SW - 260 lbs (2024) GW - 120 lbs UGW - 110 lbs

Despite binging for three hours last night, I somehow managed to lose 1/2 to a whole pound. I think b/c it was such a shock to my body that I had diarrhea for like an hour after.

@cafeopen247 Those meals look good. I'm going to have to get some recipes from you sometime on some of these things you cook.

everything i’ve had today

@cafeopen247 Big difference! Looking good!

before vs yesterday bmi 32/33 → bmi 22

I’m just done with everything (except maybe X) Maybe I won’t wake up in the morning.

Things are going dark quick tonight - faster than normal. I don’t deserve love I don’t deserve friendship I am not liked by any1 I’m a mistake Nobody’ll care if I go I don’t deserve to be gay/gender nc Don’t deserve life in general #edtwt #edrtwt

Help! Something has triggered me. I’m binging and I can’t stop. In last 3 hours I’ve had 2 pieces pizza, 2 pizza rolls, ranch, 2 big blueberry muffins, a big bowl of grapes/blueberries/blackberries w/ cool whip/cheesecake pudding mix!!

@gr33kyogurt Those look good. I need to go back and see if I can drink energy drinks. When my ADHD got out of control and I got Adderall, later Dexedrine, I would drink caffeine like these and fall asleep soon after. But ADHD med = energy. Hopefully they'll work again.

why do i buy energy drinks from anywhere else

@gr33kyogurt Dude, they make sugar free Welch's fruit snacks? Did not know. I'll have to find some. Love the Pina Colada mix but didn't know they made SF.

fucking fire

@cafeopen247 Looking good.

the fit → the spread 🙂‍↕️

When mom insists on going to Kolache Factory for breakfast b4 church and you spend 45 min. Combing through calorie info & planning and you find a meat kolache for 260 calories. Then come home to log & find its 360 calories! Pissed!

@gr33kyogurt Can you buy coconut cool whip anywhere? I might regret buying the first container if I do.

i wanted to add coconut cool whip to this so bad but i resisted because i would’ve just ate the entire container 😭😭

@gr33kyogurt @Niarexiic My showers can be long. But I can’t stay in as long as I used to b/c I feel I’ll pass out - guessing low calories. I get lost in in my head. Unfortunately all dark/neg thoughts since that’s all my head contains.

@Niarexiic my showers take around 10 minutes and i’ve started to associate it with comfort instead of stress so that might be why it’s a bit easier for me to shower even though i often find it hard to get up 😭😭

no offence but i really have no idea how people shower every single day, or even more than that !! i shower every other day or every three days if i’m too exhausted/my schedule isn’t letting me shower

At church with mom. Feverishly reading through meanspo & thinspo so I don’t freakin eat donuts or anything.

@mooncatvivi Every damn day. And then questioning the one or 2 people that might want to be around that they’re only there b/c they feel sorry for you. Especially hard being gay.

it feels like everyone always has things to do plans and events and hang outs and trips and ppl who want to be around them and invite them places and i feel like the most alone isolated loser nobody in the world

@mooncatvivi I honestly ask myself that quite a bit as well.

i feel like i have to continue living and existing out of an obligation to those around me and not because i genuinely want to live for myself

@ontheflipsiide I’ve never been formally diagnosed with anorexia. But including it, I’ve been diagnosed with/ADHD, Anxiety, Depression. Bipolar disorder is another one that I can safely say is harped. I have that too.

the most larped mental illnesses/disorders 1. anorexia 2. depression 3. bpd 4. ADHD 5. autism 6. OCD 7. anxiety

I have no idea how the freaking heck I refused ice cream at Dairy Queen. I love ice cream. I guess telling & believing myself that I don’t deserve anything sweet/good/etc like that.

@Jaws4sam I often tell myself that. Or if I eat something I’ll crush him when rolling over.

Sam spotted

@cafeopen247 You're skinny now, in my opinion. But if you were to demand an answer: no more than 10 pounds. Maybe 15 the very MOST!

what would it take for me to be Skinny? 10 lbs? 20? 25?

@errorusernote I've always had a high BMI. In 2017, I was 292 lbs and had 47.1 BMI. In Jan. 2025 when things started taking off, losing/restricting/ana, I was 255 with 41.2 BMI. Today, 199.3 with 32.2 BMI. Goal BMI is 17.5.

where are my starting at higher bmi people at??? pls i need to not feel as bad about my gw being people's sw RIP