Sturdy McKee

There is a lot of talk around here about authenticity, including by yours truly (trulies?). It's a HUGE component of the mindset of successful leaders/entrepreneurs/sellers/friends/parents/people. BUT... There are boundaries to authenticity. Take journalist @AriMelber, for example. He’s a popular anchorman who's become well-known for quoting lines from rappers and hip-hop artists in his news stories. Even though this isn't typical newsperson behavior, it's authentic to Ari's love of the music he references. But he still wears a suit and tie when he’s on the air, even though jeans and a hoodie would probably be more his style. As is true with selling, of any kind, Melber’s credibility is critical to his success. He told us, “There are styles and habits we associate with objectivity even though they don’t prove it. Looking like your grandpa’s anchorman connotes objectivity. That doesn’t mean it’s true. Someone can deliver the news in a leather jacket or tatted up and still be objective. But in a visual or social medium they might be taking on additional complexity because they have to prove themselves that much more to the people they are speaking to.” In other words, sometimes it's better to walk the line between distinctively expressing yourself and conforming to valid expectations in order to make sure you and your message are received they way you want to be. Being our authentic selves isn’t about always behaving in some absurdly distinctive way. Every single one of us is a unique individual, but we also share a whole lot with one another, starting with 99.9 percent of our DNA. We’ve all learned lots of thoughtful behavior that society expects of us. Some conformity in life is key. The training we get growing up about social graces and proper ways of handling any manner of situations involves norms of behavior that are critical to functioning in society. If our natural inclination would be to act like an a**hole, to never express appreciation, to laugh freely at others’ expense, and to constantly judge everyone, we’d be far better off to evolve and grow out of those aspects of our authentic selves. Tailoring our behavior to positive social norms isn’t disingenuous, it’s a crucial part of personal growth. Hopefully, we come to accept those positive behaviors as part of who we are. Smiling at people we’re meeting for the first time is not a bad thing. Offering sympathy for someone’s misfortune, even if we can’t quite imagine just how they’re feeling, is a basic kindness. The question is why we’re acting in these ways — are we doing it to ingratiate ourselves to make a sale or get something we want? Or are we doing it to be good humans? If you're going to curb your authenticity for any reason, intent matters.

In response to a spate of coups by U.S.-trained military personnel, @RepMattGaetz has authored an amendment that would require the Pentagon to inform Congress about U.S.-mentored mutineers. interc.pt/3swqC2K