Shane (Like Alan Ladd) retweetledi
Predictions for the HBO Harry Potter series:
Harry’s mom will come back to life as a powerful witch who fixes everything.
Snape's backstory will be completely retconned to make him a victim of white supremacy.
Hogwarts will suddenly look like an LA high school.
Black female students will be front and center and way smarter than everyone else.
There will be at least one non-binary student or teacher.
There will be at least one handicapped student and/or teacher who teaches everyone how to appreciate their disablility.
Harry will no longer be the golden child and will be constantly put in his place by female teachers and students.
Ron Weasley will become an even bigger bumbling idiot and punching bag.
The entire Weasley family will be mocked and humiliated for being poor gingers.
Hermione will become even more overpowered, flawless, and an unbearable know-it-all.
Black Snape will get way more screen time than white Snape ever did.
Black Snape will make everything about race, oppression, and how evil whiteness is.
Every powerful male creature will have a strong female tether or handler.
Female teachers and students will dominate every scene and always lecture the males about their privilege.
The mean uncle will be replaced by the now-mean aunt.
The Malfoys will become obvious Trump surrogates and pure evil rich conservatives.
Dumbledore's gayness will be proudly portrayed.
Voldemort’s followers will be reimagined as a stand-in for MAGA and white nationalists.
All the house elves will be freed on-screen with heavy slavery analogies.
And the entire story will be about how Harry learns to shut up and listen to the women and minorities around him.
What are your predictions for this show?
English
