Susan Murray

#LockdownLipSync I couldn’t resist sorry @marcusbrig & @rachelparris #PJHarvey

Grab your tix for @mattforde & @thesimonevansx June 2nd @stowtradeshall hosted by @ThatSusanMurray wegottickets.com/f/20222 #comedy #walthsmstow #eastlondon PLS RT

@Irra_____ Or you couid just scramble 2 eggs in 1/10th of the time.

Americans are NOT ready for this Japanese egg technique!

@benonwine Stop playing Scottish music over these English racist thugs

What’s the FIRST thing that comes to mind?

Genuis.

June gigs @ Trades and a favour from you lovely peeps - mailchi.mp/redimpcomedy/f…

Final call for @Halcruttenden @CareyMarx & @ThatSusanMurray tix wegottickets.com/event/695232 #comedy #walthamstow PLS RT

I need 100,000 signatures to win a parliamentary debate about the ownership of the water industry. Do your thing internet. petition.parliament.uk/petitions/7626…

@RadioX coming from a Glaswegian family Im howling right now. And commiting acts off football based violence. Obvs.

Trump's Iran Downfall

I shall be stumbling through new material @Backyard_Comedy this Thursday. Im closing the first section so I can get home and lie down in a darkened room.

@McDonalds congrats to Koln for the filthiest restaurant Ive ever seen

RT @Red_Imp_Comedy: He’s back with us tomorrow Thursday Nov 20th @almurray Pub Landlord warms up for his forthcoming tour All You Need Is…

@TheFigen_ Chimp smoking a spliff

Apparently, if you can see a fish, you're left-brained, and if you can see a plane, you're right-brained. What do you see?

OK so more dates for the fantastic BRIDGET CHRISTIE are going on sale today at 18.00hrs to the mailing list. Sign up here asap tinyurl.com/ycy598t4 2 shows both at @stowtradeshall NOTE- they are both EARLY SHOWS and Bridget will be going on first and our fabulous support act @paulmccaffreys is on 2nd and warming up for his own forthcoming tour. Doors 6.30pm Show 7pm Ends 9pm-9.30pm Early start early finish, no one gets hurt. Jan 6th Guest MC @paddylennox Jan 13th Resident Idiot @ThatSusanMurray Jan 5th is already sold out.

@EssexgoonerMr I live there. You are a blatant liar. Our community would never stand for such a thing. If your mate’s son’s dog’s cousin 3 times removed give me the CAD number because you have no idea who I am or what I do eh @stellacreasy 😜

For all the Lefty Liberal wankers, accusing me of making this up. You have no idea who I am or what I do for a living. I happened to meet the nice lady through work. She told me plenty more and I felt very sorry for her. If you don't believe me politely go Fk yourself.

There is a road in Walthamstow East London where the whole street is lived in by Muslims. They don't allow any white people to walk down the street and especially kick off if someone tries to walks their dog down the street. The lady who told me this lived off this particular street told me her son gets attacked when he walks down the street to walk the dog. They are white. The police have been called out but will do nothing. London 2025.

This made me laugh so much ( i have to as the hatred is horrifically depressing )

Ill be in Cholsey on Saturday. Always a fun room to play cholseygreathall.co.uk/events/cholsey…

@BandQ your delivery enquirey phone lines are broken. How very convenient