The Bath Bird

The thermal memory foam mattress in this photo cost about £35. The dogs are currently squabbling over who gets to lie in an Ikea bag.

@TonyDarwall It is a worry 😳

@TheBathBird Its where that thumbs been that bothers me.....

@bricshirt Thank you! The dog would definitely agree with you.

FREE: 1yo theiving bastard lurcher Please collect before the incredibly overpriced Italian pastries he’s just eaten hit his colon

@kerrylmorgan Still waiting... 😬

@Mis5pelt @estellecostanza Haha!

@TheBathBird @estellecostanza beautiful timing

This is like how my little brother used to shake the board and yell “AND THEN THERE WAS AN EARTHQUAKE” every time he lost a game.

@richardallinson They should play that, that would be brilliant. Also much more satisfying to walk to.

@TheBathBird I’m playing Seal, Crazy. Sounds suitably dystopian .

The music in Combe Down tunnel. Just in case walking underground for over a mile in semi-darkness wasn’t fucking creepy enough.

@Clive__Horn Apology accepted. Let’s draw another line under the line we’ve already drawn under it.

@TheBathBird I humbly apologies, we had

@Clive__Horn I thought we’d drawn a line under that

@TheBathBird Not for the first time

@ladybnunney Hahaha, it’s properly spooky! Particularly when there’s hardly anybody else in there.

@Clive__Horn Oh yeah, I guess you have to pretend in the car park.

@TheBathBird You can’t even go in coz of the pamdemic

@Clive__Horn If you pretend hard enough they let you out the back way so you don’t set everybody else off.

@TheBathBird Yes, and you have to well pretend to be nice and and and pretend to cry in the vets. Pretend.

@Clive__Horn That’s excellent news. It’s so worrying when they stop being total arseholes.

@TheBathBird Cat update: he’s back to being a tosser again. Phew

@Clive__Horn oh god

@TheBathBird The things she could do with Avocados was remarkable

@scotland_ewan 😂

@Clive__Horn Yes, she definitely sounds like she’d know.

@TheBathBird There’s nowt so queer as folk! My nan would say that, she was very wise and she’d know, she had a thing about mariachi bands and ropes

@scotland_ewan Thank you. We’re quite fond of him tbh, despite everything :)

@ovationchris Yes! It comes out of weird glowing discs that look like something Stephen King might come up with. The only good thing about it is that it’s roughly in the middle, so when you hear it you know you’re halfway there 😬

@Clive__Horn I don’t know, I reckon you could find a corner of twitter where pissing razor blades is all the rage. Hope he makes a speedy recovery.

@TheBathBird aye, no one likes pissing razor blades. he'll hopefully be okay, waiting for test result. thanks

@Clive__Horn Poor chap :(

@TheBathBird gentlemans issues with his water works.