Lee Jordan

@Johnprendergas @revengeofthese2 @ASFleischman whales, rather

@Johnprendergas @revengeofthese2 @ASFleischman pretty sure john and i disagree, amigo

Why do people think this is relevant?

@jenbegakis hummus features heavily in zohan. it’s a pretty cool biopic & is a good explainer for the region’s politics, if a little dry sometimes

Yes. Otherwise known as the Hummus Belt

@dumbbitchcap @bandit i can only imagine how many of these missives you catch that we never see. respek, brother

This is not sponsored &I have no reason to promote these BUT as a DUMB BITCH I have probably spent thousands$$ trying different maternity leggings, hating them all, to find on my second pregnancy that the Haynes $14 ones are INSANE. I am 5’2 and finding maternity clothes that fit me in the first place is a BITCH, let alone comfortable or cute. I am also extremely picky and only like the super soft lululemon fabric or a niche luxury brand called year of ours when I’m not pregnant. I am extremely annoyed to discover that by far the superior choice is these $14 Haynes ones from Amazon. They are incredibly comfortable, super stretchy soft like lulu align leggings, have POCKETS, and actually fit me length wise. So if you are pregnant please just trust me and buy these right now , don’t waste your time or money on other brands (Even if you are taller, these will probably be great do you because they just hit my ankles)

@LizzyStarrrdust @ShamashAran my cousin shane feels that somehow this is your husband’s fault

@TheRealLeejo @ShamashAran Not that I recall. I think it fell in there and snapped closed at some point.

AND ON THE 10th DAY, SHE FOUND THE KEY AND IT WAS GOOD!!!!!

@ClaireFosterPHD plus if they were serious about stopping the vehicle the only sure way is to take out the axels. targeting the driver obviously won’t stop the vehicle from running over ice

Suddenly all the twitter "gun experts" are scrambling to explain how hitting a larger target is more difficult.

@LizzyStarrrdust @ShamashAran was it the box you were using the last time you saw the key?! if so, what are the odds?

@ShamashAran An art pencil box

because they’re locked in cognitive dissonance having been hypnotized to believe that donald trump is coming to get them

BROTHERS AND SISTERS anytime you interact with an armed individual there is a non-zero chance you will be killed the more often you interact the higher the odds the more you antagonize them the higher the odds the more you do both at the same time the odds get pretty good

@garykoepnick @VP gosh i hope that doesn’t happen to you you delusional fucking pos

He shot her in the fucking head as she passed by him you delusional fucking POS. @VP

@valuations_ abaolutely nobody is saying that we are saying that if you make it your hobby or side-hustle to antagonize armed men and you get injured or killed, it’s not that weird

Insane amount of people who believe a reasonable penalty for disobeying law enforcement is immediate death.

@VanessaChaseOG @DonOftheDead80 that’s what no good roustabouts *do 😎 related deep cut youtu.be/u9v9fD0NjQ0?si…

@DonOftheDead80 The no good roustabouts are at it again.

Junkies no doubt and arguing over something trivial. 34 and 47 years olds scrapping in the street, They need a fucking reality check.

current politics: i wouldn’t do that if i were you i wouldn’t do that if i were you i wouldn’t do that if i were you i would NOT do that if i were you I WOULD NOT DO THAT IF I WERE YOU well, you did it…yes i’m a monster, yes i want to shoot you, yes yes you’re right go to hell

@EmbracingTara not at all, that’s not what happened, and you know it, so absolutely gfy

If your mom grazed a masked man with her car in a Walmart parking lot while trying to get away from them and the man walked away without a scratch - but then they shot her in the face - would you be on here defending the shooter or seeking justice for your murdered mom?

only a narcissistic monster would abandon her child in favor risking her life over performative nonsense she could have spoken to her elected reps who have the power to something instead of attacking the guys on ground who cannot

leftists get extremely upset when one of their meat shields gets hurt

@bigboatbruce war’s a bitch and this bitch is coming for you bigboatbruce

@TheRealLeejo She was a mother you piece of shit.

renee good’s life ended the same way many soldiers’ lives end. months of rah rah followed by a few instants of wanting a timeout the cold reality is she was a recruited enlisted & trained enemy combatant it sucks. it would be cool if they stopped, but enemies gonna enemy