⚡️Self-Driving Car Instructor⚡️🐸💙

@Rockternal @itsqail This is the real issue.

@itsqail Humans in general suck at driving no matter what.

Worst drivers u can encounter on the road: 1. Teslas (all clueless) 2. Beat up Honda Civic/accord (suicidal drivers) 3. Any BMW (a different kind of douchebag/entitled) 4. Angry F-150 guys (no explanation necessary/they need therapy)

The Make America Great Depression Again of course

NEW: President Trump makes four false claims in a 43-word post about Tina Peters. Peters is 70 (not 73), does not have cancer, was sentenced by a judge in Mesa County (not the Governor), and did not expose fraud in the 2020 presidential election.

This is totally insane. A war correspondent just received death threats from online gamblers who wanted him to change his reporting on an Iranian missile strike so they could collect a payout. One bettor had $900,000 riding on the outcome. He told the journalist he knew where he lived and who his family members were.  This is what prediction markets on life and death actually look like in practice. This is exactly why I introduced the DEATH BETS Act with Senator @AdamSchiff. The DEATH BETS Act would ban contracts on assassinations, deaths of world leaders, and acts of war on platforms like Polymarket. This story shows exactly why that matters.  When you let people place million-dollar bets on whether a missile kills someone, you create a financial incentive to threaten journalists, manipulate information, and profit from human suffering. washingtonpost.com/technology/202…

BREAKING: Secretary of State Marco Rubio is promoted to Lord Helmet, Commander of the Space Force.

@Cuddles_1331 @PaulleyTicks OMG!!! 🤣🤣

Marco-marco-marco-marco-marco Rubiiiiiiiiiiiooooooooooooo... you come and goooooooo, you come and goooooo-oh-oh-oooooooooo...

@Want2RunAgain We were in the flow of traffic! 😄

Heading west on Hwy 82 out of Tuscaloosa FAD on the HW4 Model Y is consistently displaying the wrong speed limit (it's 65 here) but driving like it knows the correct limit. FSD hurry mode. 🤷‍♂️

@EastEndJoe Trump is so full of 💩 that he is clogging toilets everywhere.

This perfectly describes the current state of our country.

@thetrueshelby It’s going slower because the price of gas is really high right now and it’s too expensive to go real fast.

Fuck. Twitter is even slower today than yesterday. What the fuck is happening? Fucking fuck off, Elon.

@tendollardanny A new President. Thanks.

passing through the strait of hormuz if anyone needs anything

@spotted_model $400. 😬 I know, you only live once. And I could add it to my collection of 3 bottles of Tesla Tequila and 2 sets of Tesla shot glasses. 🤔

@Want2RunAgain Nice

$400 with the discount btw

@VictoriaZeev @SawyerMerritt Were you around when Tesla originally sold tequila in the Tesla lightning bolt bottle? People went crazy for it. The first batch sold out immediately, and owners were selling bottles for $1000.

@SawyerMerritt So the next big innovation from Tesla is… tequila discounts in your inbox? Not exactly the future of transportation people were promised.

Tesla has sent out a new email in the U.S. “As a Tesla owner, you can get $50 off Tesla Mezcal when you purchase by March 31, 2026.”

@WOLF_Financial Hold

Predict what Jerome Powell says tomorrow using just 1 word

@teslaloosa I see what you did there.

@Want2RunAgain Tes-Lee-Loosa

Officially my darkest joke ever online came in March of 2020.

@BrittanyinTexas Being someone who drives to Texas a lot to visit family, we always laugh when we see "Drive friendly, the Texas way" on the Welcome to Texas sign. That is hilarious in its untruth.

As a Texan, I approve this message.🤠😂

Watch the short video, as aggravating as it is to listen to the toddler-in-chief. So, Gavin Newsom (or Gavin Newscum, as DJT likes to say) is currently the President? Is dementia a "learning disability"? Asking for a nation.

@admcrlsn And Michael Dougherty??

For those that aren’t following the Colorado AG Democratic primary, remember the name David Seligman. David’s platform includes prosecuting ICE, protecting immigrants, taking on AI & Big Tech companies, and going after corporate polluters. His establishment-backed opponent, Secretary of State Jena Griswold, is trying to coast to the nomination. David’s got the juice. He’s got the grassroots support. He’s not a politician. He’s an experienced attorney who has spent his career fighting for working people and immigrants. Who genuinely gives a shit about Coloradans. An upset is brewing. This is just the beginning.

@BlisterPearl Marc O'Rubio

Good morning 🍀