Widget Ridge

An unscheduled fire at Ward Manor has disrupted traffic until second noon. An investigation is underway, since the Wards usually schedule their fires.

Like to know more about the Articles of Emergence? kickstarter.com/projects/furio…

Reports of an explosion last night in the Sydney District have been confirmed. Several melted widgets were recovered at the site. We grade the explosion as C+

We will be bleeding some excess portal energy at exactly 3 and 13pm today. Please ensure your mouth remains closed during the procedure. Otherwise ghosts may come out of you and we dont know how to put them back.

A Mechanical Bison is loose at Fairbanks Observatory! If this is your bison, please come and claim it. It's very hungry and is scaring the Widget Wranglers.

Enjoy your pi today! (Victoria Grimard-Payne assured us that people would like this joke)

It's Thanksgiving in America today. Also we will be suspending prime numbers for the next twelve hours. Please use composite numbers unless absolutely necessary. We promise these things are not related.

We have received reports that ghosts have started chasing the zeppelins. Ghosts aren't real but their screams appear to be. As such the mail might be late.

Greetings again from Widget Ridge! We threw pianos at the portal generator until it started working again. They said that wouldn't fix it but here we are! (To be fair it did look pretty cool) Also: we still dont talk about Tesla so stop asking.

Your thrice-yearly warning that balloon-boating is fun and relatively safe. It also doesn't take a long time, unless you forget to bring a bag of sharp stones or a long, pointy stick.

Wait...someone else is fighting over spark? Someone should tell them that it's our thing. They should think of their own thing.

@Alucidus We still haven't mastered blood-free sugar.

@WidgetRidge Though if you manage to invent sugar-free blood I'd be interested.

I don't know why we have to keep saying this, but Widget Ridge is NOT under siege from a winter zombie horde. Winter zombie hordes do not exist. There are reports of minstrels near the south gate, but they will go away if you give them pastries or throw a piano at them.

@Alucidus Are you saying "lunch" wrong? Because that's more of a pastry thing.

@WidgetRidge Wouldn't propelling a piano through the air be more of a 'launch' rather than a 'throw'?

We have found a mechanical bison near George Street Station. If you believe you have lost your bison, please enquire at George Street Station lost and found. If you can identify it, we will return it to you, though you may be asked to replace the coal it ate.

There will be an unscheduled lava event at 2pm. Do you remember how difficult life was before we started scheduling the unscheduled lava events? This way is so much better!

The ticket machine at George Street Station has melted. If travelling to Stephenson Harbour, please have money ready for the conductor. If you melted the ticket machine, please come forward. We're not so much upset as we are curious.

Be aware of anyone trying to sell you magic beans. They are a scam. Science beans are ok though. As are baked beans. Toe beans are amazing, as always.

If a tree falls in the forest and nobody hears it, we can still find it by plotting the likely trajectory from Alistair Gaines' Tree Launcher (the one with chrome sides).

Lady Luna Ward owns several chandeliers, whereas vampires usually don't even own one. Would a vampire own several? We think not! (This message paid for by Francis and Maximilian Ward)