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@_UnStrTctureD
Unbiased | Unaffiliated | Unfiltered | Unemployed energy | Unapologetically honest | Uninvited opinions included | Unsolicited thoughts | Unbothered
lost Katılım Kasım 2023
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How Mysticism Became State Strategy??
کیا وجہ تھی کہ تاریخِ اسلام کے وہ جابر اور عیاش حکمران، جو خود دنیا پرستی کے عروج پر تھے، اکثر ایسے صوفیاء اور زاہدوں کی سرپرستی کرتے تھے جو دنیا کو لات مارنے کی تلقین کرتے تھے؟
بظاہر یہ ایک تضاد محسوس ہوتا ہے لیکن اگر ہم اس منظرنامے کا جائزہ لیں تو معلوم ہوگا کہ یہ محض عقیدت کا معاملہ نہیں تھا بلکہ ریاستی اقتدار کو طول دینے کا ایک انتہائی ذہین اور مائیکرو اسٹریٹجک مہرہ تھا۔
🔻Strategic Quietism and the Opium of Disengagement:
حکمران طبقے کے لیے یہ بات انتہائی مفاد میں تھی کہ عام لوگوں کی توجہ سیاسی مفادات اور دنیاوی معاملات سے ہٹا دی جائے تاکہ ان کے خلاف اپوزیشن اور حریفانہ سرگرمیاں کم سے کم رہیں۔
جب ایک مقتدرہ (Elite) کرپشن، ناانصافی یا اخلاقی زوال کا شکار ہوتی ہے، تو اسے سب سے بڑا خطرہ عوامی شعور اور بغاوت سے ہوتا ہے۔ ایسے میں اگر معاشرے میں ایک ایسا بیانیہ مقبول ہو جائے جو یہ سکھائے کہ
"دنیا ایک مچھر کے پر کے برابر بھی نہیں، سیاست ایک گندا کھیل ہے، اور اصل کامیابی صرف تنہائی میں بیٹھ کر روح کو پاک کرنے میں ہے"
تو جابر حکمران چین کی بانسری بجاتے ہیں۔
اسے عافیت پسندانہ سکوت
(Quietist Pacifism)
کہا جاتا ہے۔
زہد اور دنیا سے بیزاری کو بطورِ ہتھیار استعمال کر کے عوام کے غصے اور انقلابی توانائی کو مابعد الطبیعاتی دنیا کی طرف موڑ دیا گیا، جس سے تخت کو چیلنج کرنے والے حریف خود بخود ختم ہو گئے۔
🔻When Renunciation Endangers the State:
سیاسی مقتدرہ شدید اور انتہا پسند تصوف کے خلاف تھی یہاں تک کہ اس کے داعیوں کو جیلوں میں ڈالا گیا کیونکہ وہ پبلک آرڈر کو بگاڑ رہے تھے اور ایک ایسا نظریہ پھیلا رہے تھے جو اگر بڑے پیمانے پر اپنا لیا جاتا تو سماجی زندگی معطل ہو کر رہ جاتی۔
لیکن یہ کھیل ہمیشہ پرامن نہیں رہتا تھا۔ جب صوفیانہ تحریکیں انتہا پسندی کی طرف مائل ہوئیں یعنی انہوں نے معاشی سرگرمیوں کا بائیکاٹ اور سماج سے کلی علیحدگی کی وکالت شروع کی تو یہ ریاست کے لیے ایک وجودتی خطرہ
(Existential Threat)
بن گئیں۔
ایک سلطنت کو چلنے کے لیے ٹیکس دینے والے تاجر، زمینوں پر ہل چلانے والے کسان، اور سرحدوں کی حفاظت کرنے والے فوجی درکار ہوتے ہیں۔ اگر پورا معاشرہ ہی تارکِ دنیا ہو کر خانقاہوں میں بیٹھ جاتا، تو معیشت کا پہیہ جام ہو جاتا اور خاندانی نظام تباہ ہو جاتا۔ چنانچہ، ریاست نے صوفیاء پر تشدد کسی مذہبی دشمنی کی وجہ سے نہیں بلکہ انتظامی دفاع
(Administrative Self-defense)
کے تحت کیا تاکہ پبلک آرڈر برقرار رہے۔
🔻The Red Line: Cost-Benefit Jurisprudence
تاریخ گواہ ہے کہ مقتدر طبقے کا رویہ صوفیاء کے ساتھ کبھی بھی یکساں نہیں رہا۔ یہ رویہ ایک
Calculated Risk
کے تحت بدلتا رہتا تھا:
جب تک صوفی 'بے ضرر' رہا اسے سرکاری وظائف دیے گئے، مزارات اور خانقاہیں تعمیر کر کے دی گئیں، کیونکہ وہ عوام کے سیاسی شعور کے لیے ایک لوری کا کام کر رہا تھا جسے سن کر عوام سوئے رہیں۔
جیسے ہی کسی صوفی نے کوئی ایسا وجدانی دعویٰ کیا جس سے مروجہ مذہبی قانون (جس پر ریاست کی قانونی حیثیت قائم تھی) کو خطرہ لاحق ہوا، تو مقتدرہ نے فوراً اسے "غداری" (Treason) قرار دے کر عبرت کا نشان بنا دیا۔
🔻Internal Diversity and Cross-Civilizational Syncretism
بہرصورت، ایسے صوفیاء اقلیت میں تھے، اور وہ سب کے سب پرامن یا گوشہ نشین نہیں تھے، اور نہ ہی تصوف پر اثر انداز ہونے والے تمام عوامل خالصتاً اسلامی تھے۔
یہ تاثر غلط ہے کہ تمام صوفیاء دنیا سے بھاگنے والے تھے۔ ان میں ایک بڑی تعداد ایسی بھی تھی جو سماجی اصلاح، نظامِ عدل کی بحالی، اور جہاد (جیسے سرحدوں پر رباط قائم کرنا) میں پیش پیش تھی۔
اردو
Yar hum to miskeen log hain🙂...
Hamara 41C pay b Ac ni Chala abhi tk .... Hmara bill Km hi ata hai....
Phr 2 meter hain....
Or pora ghar DC py chal raha 😹 ceiling fans sy ly kr hr cheez..... Fridge AC tk ....
Lkn solar ni hai... Ab Wohi socha... Kiyo k agly month sy or Rate brh Raha hai....or ye agy b brhy ga....
My Khala just got a 45k (3 Ac) bill Boht aty hain yaha....but hyper-saving electricity is literally embedded in our DNA😹 Idk what it is but our entire extended family has this collective multi-generational obsession with turning off lightsa and fans...
Lemme tell you something funny about my baba....the moment he walks into the house, before anything else he starts observing which light doesn’t need to be on😂.... He does the exact same routine while leaving the house.. Turning off switches is basically his arrival and departure cue (that’s how we know Baba is home)
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I was visiting my Taya Abu and watching his routine (it was so funny) Every single time he gets up for Namaz from the moment he finishes his wudu to the moment he walks out the main gate he will systematically turn off 1 or 2 bulbs in his path
He will grab his bike keys click off one last light and leave....When he comes back and realizes the family turned them back on?
He immediately turns them off again...
Even though they have a complete solar energy system installed at their house! Solar panels change absolutely nothing about the habut....😒
I jokingly asked his daughter-in-law
Ye kya kr ry hain... She was like.. asy hi krty hain🥸 I said Didn't you lose your mind when you first got married and moved into this house?
She laughed said no I’m so conditioned now that when I visit my own mother's house I find myself policing them to turn off the kitchen lights the second they step out...
My Nana Abu is exactly the same....
I casually teased my dad today saying, Baba agr apny 50 plantain v install krlin na phr b you will still walk around flipping switches off....
He just burst out laughing and said... Yeah you caught us, it really is a massive trait in our entire family...
if I have to run downstairs for literally 2-3 minutes I’ll leave my room light on because I'm coming right back. But to them it’s a total glitch in the matrix.
They’re always like dubara on krny may Kitna hi time lgta hai? Turn it off and turn it back on later!
It honestly used to annoy me and now my dad knows exactly how to push my buttons. He will literally walk into the room where I am sitting switch off one of the bulbs right in front of my face, and just give me this smug, mischievous smile. Peak brown dad energy....🙆
Indonesia
I've always said this:
whenever he starts talking about feminists and constantly bashing them he has nothing to do with protecting islamic values.... but that is about his own cultural biases and misogyny shaped by a strong village or tribal mindset...
People assume that because someone criticizes feminism he must automatically be a guardian of Islamic values. That is a very naive assumption
Most of these people are quite liberal when it comes to the practices and values they personally prefer. The issue is that they often elevate cultural norms to the level of religion and then present them as if they are Islamic principles.
That is why I'm never surprised when the same individuals who passionately defend certain cultural traditions eventually end up criticizing or mocking sha'air e Islam. Once culture becomes the standard instead of Islam that outcome is almost inevitable.
Saleem Speaks@saleemspeaks2
لو جی خلیل الرحمن صاحب نے بھی فتوی لگا دیا قربانی کی پیسوں سے لوگوں کی مدد کی جاے ۔ عید قربان پر دیے گے پوڈ کاسٹ میں فرماتے ہیں ڈیڑھ لاکھ کا بکرا خریدنے کی بجاے اگر ڈیڑھ لاکھ کسی گھرانے کی مدد کر دی جاے ۔۔ تو کیا یہ قربانی نہی ہو گی ۔۔ اپ لوگوں کو بھی اس مقصد کیلے اگے بڑھنا ہے ۔ مولوی کی بتای ہوی قربانی پر نہی چلنا جس میں بتایا جاتا ہے لیلے ذبح کرو ۔ اینکر نے سوال کیا ۔۔ قربانی کے گوشت بھی غریب میں تقسیم کر کے مدد ہی تو کی جارہی ہوتی ۔۔ خلیل میاں فرماتے ہیں ۔۔ جی بلکل وہ بھی مدد ہے کیوں نہ اک نیا راستہ چن لیا جاے ۔ اس سارے پوڈ کاسٹ کو سننے کے بعد اج پہلی مرتبہ میں کہونگا اس عورت نے اس کی درست ٹھکای کی تھی جسکے ساتھ رات کو وہ تنظیم سازی کرنے پہنچے تھے ۔۔ غریب کی مدد کرو لوگوں کے کام او یہ بھی ہمارا مذہب کہتا ہے ۔ استطاعت اللہ نے دی ہے تو قربانی اپ پر واجب ہے ۔۔ اس پر انکے پیٹ میں مڑوڑ کیوں اٹھتے ہیں ۔۔
English
The "Identity-as-an-Asset" Trap (Anti-Opportunism)
Stable systems require Ontological Integrity. When you allow identity (or truth) to be manipulated for social or political gain you create a precarious and unstable society. In modern terms this applies to the importance of authenticity in branding and leadership—if your identity is purely a strategic performance (like the adopted tribesmen), it lacks the foundation required for long-term trust.
Sociology of Structural Instability
Disown members → Replace with allies → Divided loyalties → Fragmented society.
The pre-Islamic tribe tried to scale by force-feeding external people into the system. This undermined the "kinship" bond which is the foundational unit of trust. We can say that growth at the expense of core cohesion eventually leads to system collapse. You cannot scale a brand or a society if you destroy the unit (the family/individual) that sustains it.
Institutionalized Universalism:
Islam replaced a closed-tribe system with an open-network system.
This is an early form of Universal Social Inclusion and It solved the problem of social exclusion not by forcing people into families they didn't belong to but by creating a broader institutional identity. It is a profound shift from Tribalism (I belong only to my bloodline) to Civilizational Membership (I belong to the society/Ummah)
The Cost of Divided Loyalty:
when you force individuals to compete between their natural ties and sworn political alliances you guarantee role conflict.
When a society rewards people for acting against their natural instincts (like disowning kin for political status) it fosters a culture of dishonesty and anxiety. A healthy system is one that aligns the individual's natural incentives with the social requirements.
English
In an era that often feels full of selfishness and emotional emptiness you are truly blessed if you have a warm social circle and meaningful family gatherings....
If you still have mamu, khalas, phopos, tayas and cousins dropping by without formality sitting together around one table laughing over small things, staying late into the night just because no one wants the gathering to end… then you are far richer than you realize!!
Today people live surrounded by others yet remain deeply disconnected. Genuine closeness has become rare. And that is why being able to reach your people easily, to live in the same city, to gather without scheduling emotions weeks in advance is something sacred.
Relationships are not sustained by blood alone. They survive through effort, softness, presence, patience and sincere intention.....
Sadly many people today protect their ego more carefully than they protect their relationships....
Sometimes people become so emotionally dry so consumed by themselves that even love standing at their doorstep quietly leaves unnoticed....
ہر خاموشی سفاکی نہیں ہوتی اور ہر فاصلے کے پیچھے نفرت نہیں چھپی ہوتی۔
کبھی انسان اپنے ہی وجود کے انتشار ، تھکن اور بے حسی میں اتنا ڈوب جاتا ہے کہ محبت اگر اس کے دروازے پر چراغ لیے کھڑی بھی ہو تب بھی وہ اسے پہچان نہیں پاتا۔
محبت اگر ان کے دروازے پر خاموشی سے دستک بھی دے تو وہ اسے محسوس کیے بغیر گزر جاتے ہیں۔۔۔
Yes some relationships are genuinely harmful and distance can be necessary
But .....some relationships do not need grand gestures. They only need time, humility, consistency and the willingness to keep showing up.
Because at the end of the day there is a kind of exhaustion that only your own people can heal.
And perhaps the most beautiful families are the one where disagreements never become reasons to close the doors on each other!
And your family moral and empathetic values are measured by these gestures I swear....!!
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Ps:
If you are ever going to build friendships with anyone I learned this very early in life that observe how they treat their family and relatives. This reflects their empathy and also the moral values of their entire emotional upbringing and bloodline....
Most of my friends who have a strong social circle and strong family relationships stayed with me longer🤝 They are more expressive, caring and more trustworthy
Coz a person who has emotional warmth and depth within their family naturally carries that into other relationships as well.
And sometimes when you feel that someone is emotionally dry or overly complex it can come from the fact that they never experienced that emotional softness in their own family environment.
Not everyone but in many cases people from broken families or divorced parents struggle with expressing and giving consistent love in relationships. They are not always able to fully pour empathy and emotional stability into others.
It is just a self-observation pattern I have noticed over time nothing more🙂
🔻@_UnStrTctureD
Kya matlab itni garmi mein bhi ye log Eid get togethers rakh rahe hain 😭
English
ایکس پر ایسی کئی پوسٹس نظر سے گزریں جہاں لڑکیاں مومنہ اقبال کو کوس رہیں ہیں۔۔۔۔ کہ اس نے بے وفائی کی اور چدھڑ کے سارے پیسے کھا لیے وغیرہ
سب تو نہیں، لیکن ان میں سے اکثر لڑکیاں وہ ہیں جنہیں میں نے خود یونیورسٹی لائف میں دیکھا ہے۔۔۔۔
کیفے ٹیریا میں بیٹھ کر اپنی چائے، فرائز اور کولڈ کافییوووں کے پیسے کبھی انہوں نے خود نہیں دیے، ہمیشہ ان کے میل کلاس فیلوز ان کے بل بھر رہے ہوتے ہیں اور وہاں انہیں کبھی کوئی جھجک یا غیرت محسوس نہیں ہوئی۔۔۔۔۔
What kind of relationship do you even have with a guy that justifies letting him pay your bills?
This level of casual "frankness" is beghairati too okayyyyy....
And let’s look at the ground reality
how many of these university hangouts actually lead to marriage? Barely 1%
سچ یہی کہ ان کو ابھی تک کوئی چدھڑ ملا نہیں، ورنہ انہوں نے بھی کوئی کسر نہیں چھوڑنی تھی۔۔۔۔۔
کیونکہ انسان کے اندر غیرت ہو وہ کسی کا ایک روپے کا احسان بھی نہیں لیتا،
چائے کا کپ تو بہت دور کی بات ہے۔۔۔۔
اب کچھ کہیں گی کہ بھئی 500 1 روپے کا موبائل پیکج کروانا تو کوئی غلط بات نہیں ہے اس نے تو کروڑوں کی فارچونر لے لی ہے!۔۔۔
منافقت کی قیمت بدلنے سے اس کی حقیقت نہیں بدلتی۔۔۔۔
The hypocrisy is wild. If what she did on a massive scale is wrong, then doing it on a micro-level is just as wrong. Wrong is wrong, period.
You cannot condemn a millionaire-scale exploit while actively participating in a pocket-money-scale version of the exact same mindset.
It’s the same greed just a smaller budget!
اردو
@Irum_Fatimaa Okay BUT Please free her scalp from this oppression 😭 loosen her ponytails
English
وَ لَا تَتَمَنَّوْا مَا فَضَّلَ اللّٰهُ بِهٖ بَعْضَكُمْ عَلٰى بَعْضٍؕ لِلرِّجَالِ نَصِیْبٌ مِّمَّا اكْتَسَبُوْاؕ وَ لِلنِّسَآءِ نَصِیْبٌ مِّمَّا اكْتَسَبْنَؕ وَ سْــٴَـلُوا اللّٰهَ مِنْ فَضْلِهٖؕ اِنَّ اللّٰهَ كَانَ بِكُلِّ شَیْءٍ عَلِیْمًا
اور تم ا س چیز کی تمنا نہ کرو جس سے اللہ نے تم میں ایک کو دوسرے پرفضیلت دی ہے ۔ مردوں کے لئے ان کے اعمال سے حصہ ہے اور عورتوں کے لئے ان کے اعمال سے حصہ ہے اوراللہ سے اس کا فضل مانگو ۔ بیشک اللہ ہر شے کو جاننے والا ہے۔
اردو
شوہروں نے تو اپنے دوستوں پہ پیسے اجاڑنے سے پہلے یا ان کو دعوتیں دینے سے پہلے کبھی بیویوں سے اجازت نہیں لی۔۔۔۔
اجازت کیوں لینی ہے
اجازت تو ان کو بھی نہیں لینی چاہیے
لیکن انھوں نے تو کبھی مشورہ نہیں کیا( زیادہ تر نے نہیں کیا ) اور نہ ہی اپنی بیویوں کو بتانا پسند کیا ہے
Perhaps....
I have no problem with the idea of sharing or seeking advice. Even If I buy a gift for a friend I might ask another friend for suggestions or simply share my thoughts with her ... That is how trust and connection work. And the same natural flow of communication should exist in a marriage as well where there is partnership, transparency and mutual inclusion.
But In many relationships a husband keeps his personal life, decisions, friendships and spending separate, living freely within his own space.....
When a wife includes her husband in decisions, seeks his opinion and keeps him informed it is called good companionship.
Fist most of them never do But when a husband does the same why does it seem less common and less expected??
🔻@_UnStrTctureD
بیوی اپنے ہی مال میں سے۔۔۔۔ اپنی ہی ماں کو gift دینے سے پہلے شوہر سے اجازت لے لے۔۔۔۔ کسی دن ہم سنیں گے۔۔۔ بیوی سانس لینے سے پہلے ( Jo Kay hai b involuntary action) شوہر کی اجازت لے لیا کرے۔۔۔ اس سے شوہر کا دل خوش ہوا کرے گا اور گھر چلنے میں بہت بڑا کردار ادا کرے گی یہ چیز🙂 Ps: You’ll notice something very interesting like When it comes to bacho ki eidi these people immediately say: It belongs to the child. It’s their right. You cannot take it or use it even with their permission. But when the conversation shifts to a wife and her own money Then you start hearing things like: She should use her money with her husband’s permission. Maybe they don’t always say it strictly but why is this mindset so normalized in the first place??? The answer could have been much simpler and healthier: A wife has the right to spend her own money however she wants including buying gifts for her mother. There is nothing wrong with that.... Call me feminist if you want but a lot of these things genuinely sound misogynistic to me. I’ve seen too many examples of it at this point.... And honestly I think I’ll start writing more about these things from now on....
اردو
بیوی اپنے ہی مال میں سے۔۔۔۔
اپنی ہی ماں کو gift دینے سے پہلے
شوہر سے اجازت لے لے۔۔۔۔
کسی دن ہم سنیں گے۔۔۔ بیوی سانس لینے سے پہلے
( Jo Kay hai b involuntary action)
شوہر کی اجازت لے لیا کرے۔۔۔
اس سے شوہر کا دل خوش ہوا کرے گا اور گھر چلنے میں بہت بڑا کردار ادا کرے گی یہ چیز🙂
Ps:
You’ll notice something very interesting like When it comes to bacho ki eidi these people immediately say:
It belongs to the child. It’s their right. You cannot take it or use it even with their permission.
But when the conversation shifts to a wife and her own money Then you start hearing things like:
She should use her money with her husband’s permission.
Maybe they don’t always say it strictly but why is this mindset so normalized in the first place???
The answer could have been much simpler and healthier:
A wife has the right to spend her own money however she wants including buying gifts for her mother. There is nothing wrong with that....
Call me feminist if you want but a lot of these things genuinely sound misogynistic to me.
I’ve seen too many examples of it at this point....
And honestly I think I’ll start writing more about these things from now on....
اردو
Maybe I really do need a separate account... Should I permanently delete this one and start fresh?
Sometimes I just feel like writing out my random thoughts but idk for what reason it feels a bit weird to do that here. I feel like this account should remain dedicated to a specific theme or purpose.....
On the other hand I want to interact with various subjects and connect with different people but I always find myself hesitating on this platform.
Anyway I am taking a break from social media for a while especially for the upcoming month of Dhul Hijjah. I will be back later and perhaps I’ll create a completely new account without letting anyone know. Fi Aman Illah!
Please remember me in your prayers; I am in desperate need of them right now.
Ps:
The thought of deleting this account also stems from the fact that I have posted things in the past that I no longer agree with myself. This account dates back to 2023 and over time a person's perspectives, mindset and ideas change completely or gradually!
My current followers probably connected with me because of my older content and opinions. Now ,I feel uncomfortable posting things that might alienate them or go against what they initially followed me for. It just feels like they aren't looking for this evolved version of my thoughts. So maybe it's best to move on from here... Plus there are certain individuals whom I no longer wish to share my space with....
I have learned a lot from this experience....it has been genuinely good and overall everything here has been quite positive.
Maybe I will keep this account and create another one for a different theme or maybe I will keep this one dedicated to a specific purpose....
I’m still not fully sure yet!
I respect all of you.....
your opinions and everything you share. I truly wish you all the bes and I always pray that Allah keeps us steadfast upon the right path and makes us beneficial for the entire Ummah
Ameen!
ngl.link/_thinkfr331
English
I actually wanted cross cheak my own calculations about household expenses and basic needs and how much income is realistically required for a stable life....
I feel like I already have an idea that if you have two or three kidsnhow much income is actually needed to live a healthy life in Pakistan.
That’s why I discussed everything with my father to cross-check my own thinking to see if I am exaggerating or expecting too muchnand to understand what the real situation is.
I don’t know his exact current income but I can still estimate things based on the expenses and savings I see in my home. I just wanted to verify my understanding of home economics and basic kitchen expenses as well because I often do grocery shopping myself with my mother...
I also strongly believe that men in a household should give women the opportunity to understand these things too so they can learn how household budgeting actually works.
If people have this real-life awareness they are less likely to get influenced by unrealistic (too low or high) social media narratives about money because they will understand what is actually needed and what is not....
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Whenever I open x I see a lot of discussions about marriage, age, income, salary, jobs and financial expectations, so I decided to talk and share people ideas about it properly with my father and understand it from a real-life perspective...
It was a very honest and realistic discussion based on true experience.
- We talked about how much income is actually enough
- what counts as basic needs versus materialism
- when we should chase money and when we should stop
- what is the right age to start financial struggle
- the role of business, degrees and jobs in financial stability
- and how difficult it really is to build a house today compared to earlier decades like the early 2000s or it's the same?
- We also discussed how stable it is to live a good life in Pakistan
- why a job alone is not enough
- what opportunities exist and even how spirituality plays a role in how people view money and struggle.
- How healthy is this decision really
leaving your family in Pakistan and going abroad for earning?
- What things in life are actually more important than money?
- And as a provider how strongly does a man feel his responsibility and how much pressure is there on him to support his wife and children?
- Is this generation actually more hardworking compared to the previous one or not?
- Do we have more opportunities today than people had before us or fewer?
Always I never get bored discussing all of this with him until we start disagreeing a lot 😆
Idk if I should share all of this because it might trigger some people.but I feel like many discussions online ignore real ground realities.
I might share only some parts of this discussion later!
🔻@_UnStrTctureD
100% agreed! Like seriously.... I was shocked and really doubting myself 😒 after seeing there reactions on 50k salary.... My own father got married in 2002 and he was already earning six figures back then yet he still considered himself lower middle class because he was building everything from scratch.... We are living in 2026 If a man is earning 50k or 80k in a city in Pakistan today how is he supposed to manage a household, pay utility bills and handle the kitchen? It’s not about demanding luxury or wanting a lavish life it’s about the reality of inflation and survival🙂 My father always used to say that one should not marry someone who only has a job and I used to strongly disagree with him. I used to get annoyed by this idea. But now, after observing people I somewhat understand his perspective(it's not about money it's about progressive mindset) .... When I see people on Twitter getting so triggered and angry because someone points out that 50k isn't enough to run a family in this economy, it just proves they aren't even willing to face the facts. If you call a girl a gold digger for wanting a partner who can actually provide the basics so I'm sorry but it says more about your lack of vision than her demands..... I’m not saying marriage should be based only on money I fully believe in tawakkul and Allah is the provider of rizq But people also need to stop pretending that love and duas alone build homes.... Families are built on foundations. Homes are sustained through effort, planning, sacrifice and responsibility.... Desire alone changes nothing. You actually have to build the life you want! We don’t live in the times of our ancestors where everyone had farms and their own vegetables to survive. Everything costs money now. I’m not saying don’t get married until you become rich but at least stand on your own feet first asap
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