ariel𓆙

thread of funny things my kids tell me:

it's literally so important to have a little cat to come home at night.

Being a cat owner is so easy. I just open a closet door and boom enrichment and the boy is occupied for like 10 minutes sniffing around

my toxic trait is telling my cat he is a good little boy when he has actually been committing atrocities all day every day

My office is committed to supporting adult literacy services. Please contact my office for assistance.

“Your 9-5 is not permanent, it’s supposed to fund your dream” Bro my 9-5 cannot fund my transport and rent conveniently, how is it supposed to fund my dream.

My Norwegian opinion is that If your country opens a department of war and closes the department of education, then you live in a shithole country 🖐️🖐️🖐️ 🖐️🖐️🖐️

Four white men have more wealth than half the planet… & you still think a brown immigrant is why you’re struggling? 😭😭 Explain that to me like I’m five.

always listen to those who worked with her not someone who’s never known her writing a whole think piece bashing her for giggles.

EVERYTHING JUST KEEPS COSTING MONEY

this swiftie shit is forever bro im NEVER clocking out

my life has significantly improved since I’ve kept it one hundred on the land, thе sea, the sky

Mama is hungry for that smash hit and I’m obsessed with her for making it an official trend x.com/jaidenodavis/s…

So real I need this song injected into my veins

2 Benson Boone tickets for 9/17 in Houston!! Section 418

I think this is the healthiest belt i’ve ever heard in my life what the fuck

HANNAH MONTANA: 20TH ANNIVERSARY. 2026.

You literally could not pay me to give a single fuck if people use food stamps to buy soda or candy.